𝐍𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧 | 𝐂.𝐉𝐇 𝐱 𝐊.𝐘𝐒 ✓

𓆩25𓆪

Yeosang slowly started to get over Jongho, finally finding himself in things he likes to do to keep himself occupied and not think of Jongho. 

It has been successful so far. He hasn't spoken to Jongho in almost a month now, and every time he turns his head in Jongho's direction, he was caught by Wooyoung who turned his attention back. 

He really has been there for Yeosang through everything, literally from hell and heaven and Yeosang loved his best friend with his whole heart. Wooyoung was like his platonic soulmate. 

But he knows that Jongho is still trying to reach to him. He knows that he has been ignoring him and tried to get him to talk, but Yeosang never actually talked to him so far. Maybe that's for the best. 

Even if they haven't talked, Yeosang always knows that Jongho stares at him during the lunch and their shared classes. Yeosang noticed he has been quiet and that he looks a bit tired and just sleepy sometimes, but he never asked. 

He didn't want to know too. Yeosang just wanted to move on. 

"And yeah, the movie was great and San then bought me a cheesecake and coffee!" Wooyoung giggled as they walked to Yeosang's locker. 

He was talking about his and San's recent date they went on, and Yeosang just adored their relationship a lot. They were a perfect match and they just looked adorable together, and Yeosang knew to be jealous because he doesn't have anyone. 

He knew it was horrible thing to be jealous about, but he was just a hopeless romantic it seems. Yeosang hated that he would never have anyone that looked at him the way San looked at Wooyoung. 

"That sounds so cute. You guys are so happy together." Yeosang smiled. 

Wooyoung hummed. "Of course we are!-"

He suddenly stopped speaking about what he wanted to say and furrowed his eyebrows, instead focusing somewhere and making Yeosang turn around to see what was wrong too. 

Jongho was there, leaning against the lockers and making out with Iseul. They seemed so lost about it, and Yeosang suddenly felt so disappointed. He hated that he keeps seeing Iseul and Jongho and he was even more shocked that Jongho was still dating her after everything. 

Does that night and all those kisses mean nothing to Jongho at all?

Yeosang's face turned into a frown and he just looked down to his feet as Wooyoung snapped out and looked at him too.

"Hey, don't mind them. Let's just go-"

"Woo, I wanna go home.." Yeosang mumbled, fixing his strap of the bag. 

Wooyoung stared at him, noticing that Jongho parted away from Iseul who still kept her arms around him and nodded. Yeosang seemed so down, and just as Wooyoung was about to say something, Jongho turned his head to look at them. 

Wooyoung shot him a glare, literally saying that he will murder Jongho as the male suddenly shifted and looked at Yeosang whose back was turned around, suddenly feeling so awkward when he remembered that Yeosang was in love. 

"Yeah, okay. Let's go. Classes are done anyway." Wooyoung spoke, ignoring Jongho and placing his hand on Yeosang's back and leading him out to the exit. 

Jongho gulped as he watched them walk, feeling the guilt eating him alive.

► ► ► ► ►

Jongho stared at the wall with his hands behind his head, just staring into one dot and not moving for what seemed like years. He just didn't want to move and he didn't need to anyway, why would he anyway?

He doesn't have a reason to be happy and move anymore. It seems like his life was falling apart and he just couldn't do this anymore. All of his friends looked like they hated him, but Jongho wasn't too upset about that. 

He was mostly upset about the fact he cheated on Iseul and didn't feel any type of guilt at all. It was like he did nothing, like he was breathing, and yet in his mind he was blaming himself because of it. 

He was mad at himself, not at Yeosang for ignoring him when he had all the right to do so, not at Wooyoung for trying to protect him, and not on Iseul. Jongho was mad at himself. 

I mean, after all, he is the one who got so drunk he slept with Yeosang. Not the other way around, but he was mad that he was supposed to be feeling guilty and now he is feeling nothing at all.

He sighed, rubbing his hands on his face and suddenly sitting up.

He thought about Wooyoung's words a lot. He was dense about his feelings, but why? He didn't really think that he could be jealous of Yujin and the fact Yeosang and him have been seeing each other. 

Was he really jealous of Yujin? Was he really so blind about it and he instead just thought he was being protective of Yeosang and not actually jealous?

He ran his fingers through his hair before he suddenly grabbed his phone and started googling "how do I know that I like someone?"

Jongho licked his lips, clicking on the first link and starting to read. 

"Your thoughts return to them regularly - you can't stop thinking about that person, and you feel a tingle inside of yourself when you think of them. If they're having a hard time, you may worry about their difficulties and brainstorm ways to help...."

Jongho furrowed his eyebrows. He has been thinking about Yeosang a lot, and he really can't stop thinking about him too. He shook his head and read some more things. 

"You feel safe with them - When you see them, you might notice your tension relaxes, in much the same way as it does when you return home after a long day.."

Jongho does feel safe with Yeosang. Of course he does, he is his hyung. He feels a lot safer with him and trusts him more than anyone else mainly because he was just closer to him, but maybe that's because he is just liking him as a person since Yeosang is just so soft?

"You want to be together with them - You might leave their company feeling somewhat unsatisfied, as if the time you spent together wasn't enough. You may not care much about what you do together, simply that you are together..."

Jongho stopped reading, repeating the sentence over and over again. He loves Yeosang's presence next to him, but he is just feeling sad that he doesn't talk to him often anymore. He has been feeling down because he just doesn't talk to him often anymore. 

He threw his phone on the bed, sighing as he placed his face into his pillow and just lied there. He wasn't sure about anything anymore, not even his own feelings. He isn't sure what to do, and even worse, will Yeosang forgive him and he will he say it to Iseul?

And Jongho wondered even more, does he like Yeosang more than a friend?