Goodbye Kiss

62. Dear Abby

Dear Abby
Season 10 x 03
August, 2003:

it was a couple days after i heard about luka's death.
i worked one night shift during that time. however, my mom made me stay at her house for awhile because she was scared i might fall into a depression.
the days didn't get better they just sort of blended into each other. only now, instead of feeling like crying, i was numb.
my mom saw me walk down the stairs in my scrub pants, and got angry.
"you're not going to work" my ma shouted
"i have to"
"says who?"
"it's a short shift" i reassured
"leave if you need too" she pointed
"i will" i nodded
"and thank you"

i got out of my car and walked toward the ER. however, everyone was weirded out by my appearance.
"what're you doing down here?" haleh said
"i work here" i smiled
"he's upstairs"
"who?"
"him" she smiled
my face dropped and i immediately headed for the stairs.
there's no way in the world that i heard that right. in fact, as i got into the elevator i could already feel the tears well up in my eyes.
i finally made it up to recovery.
"can i help you gianna?" the receptionist smiled
i knew her back from my travelling days
"i'm looking for luka kovac" i nodded
"yes, malaria, he's in room three"
"thank you" i whispered
just hearing that, that he was alive made me so happy.
malaria, though?
i walked down the hall and stopped in front of the door. i took a deep breath and wiped away a fear from my face.
there he was. alive. only, he didn't look good at all. his skin was ruddy and tan, a beard lined the bottom of his face, his hair was sweaty, and he had blood and cuts all over his cheeks.
i walked closer toward him and he opened his eyes. they were all red with dark circles surrounding them.
"don't cry" he whispered, smiling
that only made me cry more.
he was so weak lying in that bed his voice was all raw and raspy.
i've never seen him like that.
"i'm so glad you're okay"
he took his hand and wiped a tear away from my face.
"i love you" he hushed
i took my hand and stroked it against his face
"i love you too, luka"

a couple minutes later, lukas saline drip ran out so, i went to go get a fresh bag.
"gianna?" a voice said from behind me.
she had a french accent.
i turned around to see a very smiley lady who had long brown hair.
"sorry" she shook her head
"i'm gillian"
my eyes went wide and she let out a little laugh.
"i've heard a lot about you" she added
i shook her hand.
"really?"
"luka wouldn't stop talking about you"
"and i promise i didn't do anything with him"
"he loves you a lot" she smiled
i wasn't worried one bit of luka cheating on me.
"yeah, i heard about you and carter" i smirked
"he's a charming guy" she shrugged
"thank you for finding luka"
"he's an amazing doctor" she nodded
"you work in the ER?"
"yeah, i'm a nurse"
"if it's okay i'm gonna stay a couple days before going back to africa with john"
"i'm sure luka would like that" i smiled
she nodded her head.
——
i got called not one but three times to the ER.
"what's up?"
abby was out of breath
"first off, i'm really happy for you about luka"
"and i'm sorry to ask you this"
"but there's only four of your nurses now"
"what?"
"they didn't want to tell you but i'm swamped down here"
"i can work tomorrow" i nodded
"that's fine"
"i got it from here with malik"
"but i'm gonna need some sleep tonight"
"i know you're grieving and im sorry" she added
"i'm okay knowing luka is okay" i smiled
"thank you" she shouted, running down the hall
i walked the opposite way and found malik.
"gianna" she exclaimed, wrapping me in a hug.
"im so happy you don't even know, malik" i grinned
"i know you are" he smiled
"my g is back again" he exclaimed
"i was worried about you" he added, pointing at me as he walked down the hall.
"i'll be on tomorrow" i smiled
———
luka slept for an hour before he wanted to stretch his legs.
i held his iv pole behind him as he walked down the hallway.
abby came through the doors with a smile on her face.
"welcome back"
luka have a little wave.
"i met gillian" she added, nodding her head
"yeah, she went to a hotel to get some sleep"
"did you read my letter from carter?"
"no" luka smiled
"you two are the only ones who haven't"
"i think he just wanted to let you know why he stayed"
"he dumped me" she shrugged
i was kind of shocked myself
"he found someone new or something"
"it was doomed from the start i guess"
"at least one of us realized that"
"i don't know what to say" luka shrugged
i stood beside him, silent.
"i'm happy you're okay"
"and i'm happy you two are together again" she smiled
"have a good night, abby"
"you guys, too"
i turned to face luka.
"ready to sleep again?"
"yeah" he whispered
i held onto one of his hands and helped walk him back to the room.

it was dark outside when i sat in a chair next to lukas bed. gillian went off to go find some food and i had called my mom about luka. she was really happy too.
i've never been so happy and relieved in my life. i was on cloud nine.
"you look tired" he whispered
"everyone told me you were dead, i haven't slept in awhile" i smiled
"how was africa?"
"it was great"
"sad"
"but the reality"
"all these starving mothers and children"
"they couldn't care less about the politics that go on"
"they just want their children to live a good life"
i looked down.
"makes you feel really bad, huh?"
"even though there's better hospitals or whatever out there"
"at least we're living" i added
he nodded his head.
"there was a moment i was praying for my life"
"all the other westerners were captured with me, getting killed"
"if god hadn't been by my side, i don't know what would've happened"
i held onto his hand and squeezed it.
"it brought me back"
"how much i took advantage of my life before" he smiled
"of us"
"i'm so glad you're okay"
he smiled
"it's late"
his voice was still raspy
"you should go home"
he closed his eyes.
"i'm not leaving you, luka"
"can i get you anything?"
"you can lay next to me"
with his eyes still closed, he moved over and opened his arms.
i got onto the bed and put my hand on his chest.
"i love you" he whispered, kissing my forehead.
"i love you too, luka"

a/n: i made y'all think it was over but it AINT! this is just the beginning.. i'm so glad luka is alive and i'm so glad gianna and them are reunited. i remember watching these eps and let me tell you,, i was in shambles when they said THE luka kovac was dead. lots of people hated this africa arc but i like it. for now... this part of it was good but it's gonna get worse. not this fic though! that's only getting better. stay tuned for the good stuff. i hope you enjoyed, and as always;
xx.