English Love Affair// Calum T. Hood

Her

A/N don't worry this is the picture from Australia Day.They haven't been seen together since or verified a relationship, but CALUM HAS NEEDS OKAY HES 19 FFS.

Just thought I'd get that of my chest
Anyways hope you enjoy xo

Calum PoV:
I've ruined everything, Alex might not even want me to go on tour now after that.All because of her.

Jess still hasn't got back yet I know Luke ran after her so I'm sure she's safe.I really hope she is.

I should have just dropped it and stopped being a jealous idiot.I was drunk and in a bad mood which is not a good mixture.

When she went to get drinks with Alex I couldn't take my eyes of her.The way she: smiles with him,her laugh, the way she stuck her tongue out a little when deciding what to get.Jess was mine and I've ruined it all, I've probably ruined her it's sure ruined me.

You see while I was watching her this girl came and sat on my knee, I don't even know who it was.Although she was not my type at all, she seemed like one of those really annoying girls.The way she was talking in her squeaky voice really pissed me off.

She kept asking me things till I turned around: "do you have a girlfriend?", "is she hotter than me?" , "is she here tonight?".The answer was always "YES" but she didn't seem to get the point.

As soon as I turned around to tell her to get off me she moved my hands of my lap and put them around her waist.I was pretty drunk at this point so didn't see what was going on, although I kinda new it was wrong but didn't know how to stop it.

She leaned in and I didn't want to kiss her ,never mind how drunk I was I love Jess.
I pulled away immediately but I new someone had saw when I heard a glass smash of the floor a couple feet in front of me.

"Alex no"i heard Jess shout and as soon as I saw her crying I wanted to run to her and hug her and not let go ever.I knew that wasn't going to happen though when Alex lunged at me his fist hitting me straight in the nose.

"You cunt"he said shaking of his hand.I tried to tell her I'm sorry and that I love her, because I do.But when I was about to walk over to get Alex told me to "save it" and Jess ran.God knows where she ran but I knew she was safe because Luke glanced at me then ran towards her.

Now I'm laid on the bed crying because I've fucked everything up again.I haven't moved for about an hour so I decide to check the time.

3:00am
The door cracks open a little and I here a familiar voice mumble at almost a whisper.
"Cal"Jess mumbled.
"I'm sorry"i told her and I could here she was still crying.

"Why did you do it?"she asked still standing in the door way.
"Can you come sit down?"i asked patting the bed beside me.
"I suppose but I'm not sleeping in the same bed as you"

"Okay but can I explain?"
"Please do"

"Well I couldn't take my eyes of you earlier when you where at the bar and you looked amazing.Then when I was caught up watching you that girl come and sat on my lap.

I know I should have moved her then"

"But you didn't Calum this all could have been stopped if you moved her"Jess cut me off.

"I got jealous okay, when that bar man was flirting with you I could see it across the room.I know I shouldn't have let her kiss me okay.
The truth is I just wanted it to be you ,I love you Jess."

"So you got jealous again Calum, this needs to stop.Either you give me a good enough reason as to why you've been so jealous.Or....or I'm breaking up with you."

I can't tell her about the dream, not now.Maybe not ever because I don't want those thoughts putting into her head.

"Jess I can't ,not yet I'm so so sorry, this is all my fault.I love you so much"
"And I do love you Calum but I guess this isn't the right time for us to be together right now."

"I'll sleep on the couch"i mumbled standing up and grabbing a pillow.
"What about your nightmares?"she asked shyly.
"I can't tell you about them yet."i mumbled heading towards the door.
"I meant that but won't you have them tonight"

I thought for a while and shrugged"probably, and look I don't want you to be alone in case you do anything."

"So where we gonna sleep tonight?"
"Alicia's your step sister right?"
"Yeh"
"I'll go sleep in there room with Ash and she can sleep in here"
"Okay"she smiled weekly and I walked to there room.

I knocked on the door but no answer.So I tried again,i heard shuffling and Ashton popped his head out of the door.

"Alicia's just fell asleep"he sighed catching his breath."sorry"i mumbled realising why they left early when Ashton walked out into the hall way in his boxers.

"Bro what's up?"he asked tapping me on the shoulder.
"I've hurt Jess pretty bad, you weren't there but I guess you're busy so just leave it."

"No I'm not gonna just leave it ,what made you come and knock on our door at half three in the morning?"

"Jess doesn't want me to be on my own cause of my night mares.But she won't sleep in the same bed as me.So I was thinking me and Alicia could switch."

"I'm sorry but I think you've gathered why we left early.So this is kinda of a bad time to switch because she's asleep now.Why don't you ask mike, I know Caitlin fell asleep earlier."

"Thanks Ash"
I continued my search for someone to swap rooms with trying Luke who was asleep until I got to Michael's room and he wasn't there.

I got back to our room and Michael was sat on the bed and Jess looked asleep with her head on his shoulder.
"Why you in here?"i asked rubbing my eyes from tieredness.

"Jess told me what happened, so look bro she's asleep now and you know I won't make a move.So why don't you go in my room, Caitlin knows what's going on."

"Thanks bro, look after her"i sighed admiring how beautiful she was sleeping, even with tear stained cheeks.

"I will, just don't try anything on Caitlin.In Fact I wouldn't even try talk to her she's so pissed of with you right now"

"I get it"i said walking of to Michael and Caitlin's room.

Caitlin was half asleep when I got there but still managed to put me in my place straight away.
"You've fucked up Calum"

"I know"

"You can sleep on there"she pointed at the sofa by the bottom of the bed."I'm only letting you sleep in here so you don't have those bad dreams things and that Jess is safe.I know how much those nightmares scare her."

"I know Caitlin"
"It's a good job I love Mike and Jess or I wouldn't be talking to you right now"

"I get it, goodnight anyway"
"Night"she bluntly said but it wasn't a goodnight for me at all, I didn't sleep one bit.