His Redemption (MxM)

Chapter 21

Luke

"I...."

"You ..." We both started at the same time and stopped, he closed his mouth and looked away from me

"You go first" I whispered out but he shook his head and looked at me

"No, you go first" he muttered out, okay this is fucking awkward, things have never been this awkward between us, not even when that thing happened

Things have been intense and rage filled between us, but never this awkward, I tapped my hand on my body before I finally sighed out and looked at him
"They told me you were shot" I muttered out, I almost face palmed myself, way to go Luke, that's very subtle, of all the things I had to say, I had to mention the one thing I'm not supposed to talk about, I came here to say goodbye and not to make myself look even more worse than I am now

"Uhm yeah... Winston shot me" he muttered out looking at me, why am I acting so weird about this, and why is he acting so weird, this is not how I expected my goodbye to go.
I should just rip the band-aid off and just tell him, I'm going to tell him anyway, no need to drag it longer than necessary, and plus, I kept a cab driver waiting outside for me with my luggage.

I looked at him and he was looking at me, I sighed out and took a step closer to him "I'm leaving" I blurted out and his gaze on me hardened, not in the usual anger kind of way that I was used to, more like shock and surprise, why would Stefano be surprised that I'm leaving

"What"? He asked looking at me "but you just got here, what do you mean you're leaving"? He asked and I just frowned, he thinks I meant leaving the hospital, I just shook my head

"No, I mean I'm leaving New York, I'm going back to Italy" I finally explained and I didn't look at his face, I don't know why but I felt like if I did, it'll make this even harder for me "Hewitt is right, I shouldn't be here, I shouldn't be around you, I always end up hurting you and you don't deserve that, you never did" I rushed out and I was expecting to hear him agree with me, tell me how bad of a friend I was to him, how it is my fault that he's in the hospital, but when he opened his mouth, it shocked me again

"I heard you" he muttered out, causing my gaze to cut through to him, he was looking at me softly, his eyes tender and calm "two days ago when you were talking to me, I heard you" he added and I just stared back at him, he's talking about my apology when I was here two days ago, when I thought he was unconscious

"But I thought....." He cut me off

"That I was unconscious? Yes I was but I could still hear everything and I heard you" he whispered, I just clenched my jaw and looked away from him, I didn't know how to feel, I wasn't exactly ecstatic that he heard my apology, it doesn't change anything, I know he thinks I'm just making excuses and trying to justify what I did.
"I've spent so long blaming you for what happened, to the point that I didn't bother to listen to you, like really listen, I didn't want to believe that it wasn't your fault" he started and I just let my eyes rest on him, what is he saying, his eyes were soft and calm, I couldn't fathom where this conversation was going "I guess I just wanted someone to blame for what my father did to me, and knowing you told him, made me just.... It made me put everything on you because that way it was easier than accepting that my dad never really cared for me like a father should" he rushed out, I didn't know how to react, I was just...  Just looking at him, I didn't want to jump into conclusion yet, but deep down my heart was pounding fast, my brain was making up different ways this conversation could end.

"I guess I'm just saying, maybe I've been too hard on you and it's time for me to move on from all that, bury it in the past" he muttered looking at me, is Stefano saying what I think he's saying, or I'm actually having one of those dreams again?
"What happened may have been your fault, but I don't think you meant for me to get hurt, at least that's what you said two days ago" he muttered chuckling out nervously, I swallowed and looked at him, I didn't know what to say, was he expecting me to say something?
"Luke" he called and I just bit my lips "say something" he whispered out.