His Redemption (MxM)

Chapter 29

Hewitt

What happened between Luke and I, shouldn't have happened, I shouldn't have let myself go like that for him, to the point of us having sex, not once, not even twice, and that's a first for me.
I've never had sex with the same person twice, but I've had sex with Luke, 3 fucking times.

And it's not because he's special or that I like him, I don't like him, I don't think I ever will, it's just that sex with him was different, it felt different.
There's something about the way his body wraps around my dick that's unlike anything I've ever felt.

Sex with Luke doesn't feel like sex with other hook ups I've had, they don't stick to my head like sex with him does, that day when he came to my apartment and asked why I hated him, I didn't plan to do what I did, it was the drugs I took and the fact that the more he stood there, the less control I had over my body, his presence was literally turning me on.

I couldn't stand to see him, because I hated how he was making my body react, no one should have that much sexual power over someone, especially not someone like Luke, and he shouldn't have such power and effect over me.

I'm not gay, I'm as straight as they come, I've never been attracted to another man, sexually or otherwise, so why him? And why now.
I don't even like him, if I had probably an incline of likeness towards him, it would have been justifiable, but I don't even like this guy, everything about him infuriates me, so why does he affect me so much?
So much that I can't even control myself around him

I want to have sex with him just as badly as I want to punch him in his face, he annoys me and he turns me on.
It's strange, fucking strange and weird.
And I noticed that ever since I started hooking up with him, I've not hooked up with any other girl.

Yesterday at Spade's shopping trip, I didn't think I would have sex with him, that too in the bathroom, but the more I kept trying not to think about it, the harder I got and at a point I just wanted nothing than to rip his clothes off and destroy his body.

This is all my fault, this started after the first time I touched him, I was blinded by anger, and now I'm being punished for it, cause I can't seem to stop myself.
I've tried to tell myself that I'm not gay, and that I hate him, but it would seem my body has a mind of it's own

"I've decided that I will go see him tomorrow" Stefano's voice broke my chain of thoughts as I turned my attention to him, for a second there I had forgotten he was here with me

"Who"? I asked and he just made that face that made me realize who he was talking about, I clenched my jaw and narrowed my eyes at him

"Are you sure"? I asked and he just sighed out heavily and nodded "you know you don't have to do this, you've got nothing to prove to anyone" I added and he just nodded

"I know I don't have to, but I want to" he whispered, I know he's been wanting to go see his father's grave since he got out of the hospital, but it's not been an easy choice to make "I've gotten an explanation and a ton of closure from Luke, I think it's time I get some from him too" he added, causing my mind to once again sway to Luke, the one person in this world that I want to keep as far away from me as possible, but it's proving difficult to do that.

Not when everytime I hear his name I get sexually excited, my dick seems to recognize his name, I sighed out and adjusted myself on the chair.
I bit my lips, studying Stefano, maybe I should ask him, I mean he's more gay than anyone I know, he knows things like this, he understands them

"How'd you know"? I blurted out and his face pulled up into a frown

"What"? He asked and I swallowed and rephrased my question