His Redemption (MxM)

Chapter 61

Luke

I could hear Stefano knocking on the door, I don't know how long he's been there, because I lost count of time, and I didn't have it in me to respond to him, he had been knocking and it was getting loud with each second.

But my heart was too heavy, my chest was tight with pain, I just swallowed the lump in my throat, I wanted to scream out loud, to cry like I was going to die any time soon, because that was exactly how I felt right now, like a corpse.

"Luke, buddy please open the door..." I heard Stefano's voice from outside, my eyes moved to the door, blurry and covered in tears, I didn't even know he had followed me back home, after I left Spade's place and headed here, I did it in hopes of being alone with my thoughts, but Stefano had followed me, and now he was banging on my door, making it hard for me to even cry in peace.

If I thought my heart had broke when Hewitt told me he didn't have feelings for me, I was fucking wrong, because now, my heart was shattering into a million pieces, it was as if someone ripped my heart out of my chest, and I was watching it beat and wither away.

I have never felt pain like this in my life, watching Hewitt and.... I can't even bring myself to say it, but my mind won't stop thinking about it, and I was losing my mind, the face he was making, knowing he was finding pleasure with someone else, knowing that in truth, I was nothing but another one of his hookups...

I sighed out, trying to block out my own thoughts, but that in itself was impossible.
I heard the door crack with a loud slam, making it open wide, I couldn't even react, as Stefano rushed towards me, his eyes filled with panic, I just sat on the floor, blank, emotionless and empty.

He cupped my cheeks, looking into my eyes "hey buddy, Luke, what happened, did he do something to you"? He rushed out, checking my body, but the pain I was feeling wasn't on any part of my outer body, and it was worse than any pain I'd ever felt in my life.

I just shook my head, willing my mouth to open but nothing came out, other than a whimper
"Shhhh... Buddy, talk to me, I'm scared" Stefano rushed out shakily, I didn't want him to be worried for me, I brought this upon myself, I gave myself this ..  this....
"What happened"? He asked and I swallowed hard, shutting my eyes briefly before I looked at him again

"He didn't do anything to me" I whispered out, if he wasn't listening closely, I'm sure he wouldn't have heard me, but he did "it hurts..." I croaked out, and he frowned, looking me over from head to toe, trying to find what I was talking about

"Where does it hurt"? He rushed out, taking my hand in his, I just clenched my jaw, feeling the tears brim my lids "look at me Luke, tell me where it hurts" he whispered out and I felt the tears leave my eyes

I took his hand and moved it up to my chest, placing it against my heart "it hurts here, Fano it hurts so much" I croaked out before I threw myself into his arms, he wrapped his hands around me and cradled my body close to his chest, running his hand down my back, I was whimpering and sobbing lightly, I didn't even care anymore if I looked and sounded pathetic, I just wanted to let it all out, I just wanted to cry, to let go.
"Why does it hurt so much"? I asked against his chest, he cooed still running his hand on my back, I felt him rest his chin on my head.

"Because it's real, what you feel for him, it's real" he whispered, still rubbing my back, I didn't know I could feel so much pain all at once.

I've seen people I hooked up with, hook up with other people, and it never hurt this much, hell I've even watched Stefano do things with Matteo, I even heard them have sex, but watching Hewitt and that girl, it broke something inside of me.
It broke a part of me, and I don't think I'll ever be able to fix it.