His Redemption (MxM)

Chapter 20

Luke

I moved closer to his bed, I was afraid to touch him, I don't want to hurt him, he looked peaceful and asleep, I know he couldn't hear me, I looked at the monitor screen and it was steady, moving at the normal rate a monitor would move.

I swallowed hard and shoved my hands into my pocket "hey" I whispered out shakily "Hewitt told me you were shot, Winston shot you" I paused and frowned, this is fucking harder than I thought "he said you were fighting to come back, but you know you have to come back right"? I asked shakily, looking at the monitor again, it was still the same "you have to come back for him, he needs you, they all do" I whispered out moving closer to him.

"He's dead, but I guess you probably already know that" I said with a light chuckle, humorless one "it took us 16 Years but we finally got rid of him, even though I didn't do much" I said with an uneasy smile "he caused us a lot of pain" I said swallowing hard, this is not about me, no, it's about Stefano, I came here to talk to him, to apologize for what I did to him.

I sighed out heavily "I didn't mean to make you suffer" I whispered out shakily "...when I told him..when I told Winston about you, Stef I did it to protect you, I didn't know.... I didn't know he was going to do what he did and there's no day that goes by that I do not regret it" I croaked out as I looked at him, he didn't react and I didn't expect him to, he was unconscious.

"I'm sorry.... Stef I'm so sorry, I didn't mean for you to get hurt, ever" I whispered out clenching my jaw tight "I didn't know.... I didn't know how much what I did hurt you, I thought I did but I didn't, I couldn't possibly understand how much I hurt you, but I do now, and I'm so sorry" I sobbed out, feeling the tear drop from my eyes, I sniffed and used my hand to wipe my eyes away.

"I know You're probably not going to remember hearing this, infact I doubt you can even hear me now, but I'm really sorry and I came back to mend things, I came back to apologize to you and make things right but I only made it worse and now you're here, unconscious and I don't even know what to do" I whispered out huskily, the chunk of emotions in my throat, blocking me from being able to speak well "I'm scared Fano, I lost you once and I don't want to lose you again, even if I know you hate me now"

I ran my tongue through my lips and swallowed hard again "I wanted to come a long time ago, I wanted to be there for you, but he threatened me, Winston.... He threatened me with you" I whispered out "he knew how much you meant to me, so he threatened that if I ever made contact with you or told anyone what he did, that he would bring you back and hurt you even worse" I choked out with a sob wrecking through my throat "I couldn't let that happen Stefano, I had to stay back, I had to stay back because of you"

I swallowed hard and looked at him, cleaning the tears away from my face, I sighed out heavily and shoved my hands into my pocket "I have to go now, Matteo would soon be back and he wouldn't be happy seeing me here, but I'll come back, I promise you Stefano I will come back" I told him before I looked at him one last time, and walked out of the room.

I tried to clean my face so I wouldn't freak any out on my way out, I rushed past the front lobby and made my way to my car, I sat inside and broke down into tears, uncontrollably tears, how did he manage to do it, I've been a mess since I got here, how did Stefano manage to go through all that and he still.... He's still so strong and positive, if I were him I probably would be dead in a ditch somewhere.

I hiccuped and tried to calm my racing heart, the last time I cried like this was the day he left.
Even though he's not on talking terms with me, I can't lose him, he can't just go like this, after everything he's been through, he deserves to have a happy life, a happy ending.

*****

I looked around the living room of my hotel suite and I swallowed hard, am I really thinking about this?
I mean I know I already made my decision but it's still kind of...weird and sad.