ODDS OF LOVE - SEASON THIRTEEN

Episode 158

That afternoon a good sized crowd gathered at the Shady Haven Cemetery in Frederick County, Maryland in the Kendall family plot for the burial of Dr. Gordon Kendall.

Representing Barrington Academy was Gerald who stood erectly next to Alfred with his walker. Gerald had his arm slung around his fiance's stooped over shoulders, uncaring of who might see them and judge.  Near them in the moderate gathering of people in dark suits and dresses were DuBuis with Theodore and the Duncan family representative Jeremiah with his fiancee Bliss.

Near the front stood Ariel in a demure black dress and elegant dark veiled hat , sunglasses to hide her eyes. The new widow was between Nicholas and her older son Jeff who kept looking suspiciously at Nicholas. Alan had been at the Montgomery county Catholic church where the funeral had been but since his manual wheelchair hadn't been able to make it through the grass and mud from a brief rain he remained in Spencer's handicapped accessible minivan with Spencer for the actual burial.

The priest read one final prayer over the closed bronze casket that was covered with his white lab coat and Jeff's old high school football jersey as per Ariel's instructions. Then as he finished Theodore stepped forward with his beloved violin. Theodore looked towards the parking lot across the expansive green lawn lined with stone tombstones  , looked at the minivan with Alan sitting in it. With a unsmiling young face that had shielded blue eyes behind his glasses Theodore began to play the most hauntingly beautiful version of Amazing Grace anyone present had ever heard in their lives. As he played his eyes drifted closed and he pictured his grandfather in his head.

Ariel felt her breath catch suddenly as her mind flashed back to her wedding day so long ago when she and Gordon had once been happy. Happy and in love. She began to sob quietly and both Nicholas and Jeff put their arm around her shoulders , pulling her closer to each of them.

Alan sat in the passenger side of the car , staring out of the window and listening to the music drifting along on the wind it seemed. He said quietly," He beat me. "

Spencer was startled at the soft words but not really. He knew DuBuis had suspected as much. " I'm sorry. "

" So am I. I tried to be so good. If I was good enough maybe he would love me. That's what I thought. I wanted him to love me. " His voice cracked. " Because I loved him. He was my father. Jeff hates him but I love him. I'm stupid, right? "

Then the tears he had been trying to hold back overflowed from his brown eyes as he heard his boyfriend's violin and he began to cry like his heart was breaking. For himself and his useless legs. For his mother. For his brother. For his father.

Spencer reached over to touch the boy's shoulder in an awkward sympathetic move and patted it a couple of times. " You're not stupid. You're human. Your father was not perfect. But I'm sure down deep he loved you. In his own way. " Spencer didn't know how true that was really. He knew math and languages. Numbers. Logic. What did he know about emotions and feelings and love really?

As Theodore played the final notes of the song the very faint image of Dr. Gordon Kendall appeared beside the minivan looking at the young son who cried before him. His hand reached out to touch the boy's hair through the open window. Alan flinched slightly as though he felt it.

Gordon murmured," I'm sorry I was an awful father to you. To Jeff. I'm so sorry for everything. I do love you, son. Be happy. For you. Goodbye. "

Then he slowly disappeared and faded away just as the violin playing did.