Creepy Experiences

Wolf Came Back

November 19, 2024

Even though I'm human, even though I wanted to kill Wolf, he still hasn't let go. He's been coming every night in spirit form ever since the last chapter. At first, I thought he just wanted to correct some of the claims I made in the last chapter. He told me that he never hated me because I was human and that he did love me. I didn't want him to come back, but he did anyway. 

When I asked him about the curse, he responded that if he were in my situation, he would do the same. If someone took away someone that he loved, he would want to kill them. He also got the impression that I was regretful about my actions which is incorrect. I did the spell impulsively, but after the event, I was confident that Wolf's feelings were gone and that I had pulled the last straw. 

My feelings toward Wolf are complicated. On one side, I see Wolf as ferocious, sadistic, lustful, possessive, obsessive, jealous, and aggressive. He pisses me off. Especially when he tries to control my life or people around me, or puts spells on me. I checked today and found a bruise on my thigh and I asked him if he did that. His reply was yes. I hate it when he leaves marks or touches my private parts. 

I can't stop thinking about him though. Sometimes when he's around, I feel weak. It's easier to give him what he wants even though I hate it. He was also there for me when I wanted to do something bad to myself. Though I wonder if his other actions undo this single good act that without him I might have died. Sometimes I empathize. I am lonely. After I got involved with cps, I had many experiences that proved to me that I could never talk about that side of my life.

It is hard for me to be emotionally or physically intimate with anyone, so all the past relationships were short. Wolf has stuck by me after all these years. It's natural that I would be easily coerced and manipulated by him. He has stalked me for years. He knows how to wear me down, what motivates me, and my weaknesses. I know that this isn't healthy. I wish I could make him stop. It feels hopeless though. He didn't want me to return to this book, but now I've disobeyed him. I guess this isn't the end.