Slice ng Life

Pang-apatnapu't Dalawang Slice

Jet's POV:

Hours have passed since that very unlikely and unexpected confrontation I had with Richard. And every ticking of a second that passed me has nothing but a repeat of that fateful moment he unleashed. Over and over again, his voice keeps on telling me his narration and most of all, his confession.

Wiping my tears, "Tsk!"

When I hurriedly stormed out of the restaurant, he pleaded that I stay because he cannot seem to understand the reason why I'm reacting in such a manner. But to no avail, I left him. I felt as if I'm gonna explode that instant if I do not take my self out of there, I just can't stand it.

He kept on calling and texting me during my drive home - all ignored. "I don't even know how I got myself home thinking that my mind was all a blur ever since I left that table." And as soon as he got here, he kept knocking on my door, pleading that I go out and talk to him. But all of that, I answered with silence...stupidly crying on my bed, I kept my silence until he stopped. 

Asking my self, "Do I want that? - Ignoring the guy who's pleading and crying for me to face him? No. Not at all...But I just can't get myself to face him or even talk to him right now...I can't."

Tears kept going out of my eyes for reasons unclear to me. My heart's beating fast in a strange way. I just can't really explain, but my inside sucks, it feels awful. It's the first time I've ever felt this way, "As if I'm humiliated or what, confused but for what?"

Turning on my side for the nth time, I don't think there would be any sleeping for me this late at night. Within the darkness of my room, my soul is anguishing. As a tear drop make its way out of my left eye I whispered, "Richard! Why do this?"

Nainis ako sa sinabi at inasal ni Richard. I felt like he was mocking me with his statements. Just because I'm being natural and honest with him, to the point of even exposing my vulnerable side, doesn't mean that he could make fun of it nor take it lightly. 

"He should know his place and not play with my fragile self." Mukha yatang masyado syang naging familiar sa akin that he's crossing his line. Honestly, I felt like he was looking down on me, he hit my pride. "Tsk! Is he making fun of me?"

"But this is Richard I'm talking about," I sighed as I bury my face on my pillow.

Richard's one, if not the most honest and sincere person I know. And, hindi naman nya siguro gagawin sa akin yun to belittle or mock me. 

Now, my mind is split. With that thought comes this big part of my heart that's telling me that what I did, what I'm doing, was and is plain wrong. 

"Gosh..."

Hindi ko yata sya dapat sinabihan ng ganun, di ako dapat nag react ng ganun. "After all his kindness?"

"Pero kasi...bakit naman nya biglang sasabihin yun?"

Could he really be serious? Richard's not the type to conceal whatever it is that he's feeling. He's honest to the bones. Talking to myself, 

"So yung mga remarks and jokes nya these past weeks, are those true?" How naive could I get? 

"But do I see him in that light? Could I reciprocate those honest feelings of his?" He is a guy after all and not the type to be in my state.

"This sucks!" I shouted as tears continued to stream down my face.

Suddenly, a thought from a not so distant past quickly came rushing back. "And that kiss?" That intimate moment we shared in brief.  "What was that then? That feeling you felt after clearing your thoughts about it? That beating of your heart you've experienced for the first time - you know what it is, yes you do."