Daddy Issues

78 - Roger

'Will you sit down? You're making me nervous,' Dan says when I make another frustrated lap through his apartment.

'No!' I yell out. 'I can't sit still. Tonight is going to be a disaster.'

'It will just be a few short hours. You'll get through it.'

'I wish you could be there with me.'

Dan snorts.

'I'm sure that would go over well.'

It wouldn't. Tonight's the night that I'm meeting mom's boyfriend Roger, even if neither me nor my mother wants it. But she doesn't want him to think that she's not taking the relationship seriously, so tonight, we're having dinner at our place together.

And I'm freaking out. Everything is already so tense, I'm sure I'll do or say something that will piss her off. She won't like it if I'm rude to him. But she won't like it if I'm too nice to him either. I don't want her to think I'm trying to mess up her relationship again.

Uttering a frustrated sound, I walk over to the kitchen counter where Dan's preparing us some lunch. He's just about to cut up some avocados.

'Can I help?' I ask, to distract myself. 'How do you cut those? I never managed to get it done without throwing away like half the avocado.'

Dan gives me a bit of a side-eye, once again surprised by my very limited cooking skills. Even if they have grown substantially in the last few months. But then he hands me an avocado and a knife.

'Here, I'll show you.'

I take them both into my hands and watch his demonstration. Only half-paying attention because my mind is still on the disaster that tonight's going to be.

'The trick is to cut it in half, so you can just take it apart.'

I've decided I'll just be nice and answer whatever questions this Roger has for me, but I won't show any more interest in him than necessary. I'll just let him decide whatever he wants to tell me.

'Then you've got two halves, see? So to get the pit out, you just jam your knife into it, so you can pluck it out.'

I focus on Dan again and follow his movements. Then I smile at him proudly when I've actually managed to get the pit out without any mess. Who knew this could be so easy?

Dan laughs when I show off my pit to him and moves on to the next part.

'Then, I find it easiest to cut the avocado into slices when it's still in its skin. And then you can just scoop it all out. Be careful with the knife, though.'

What Dan's doing seems easy enough, so I copy him and cut the flesh of the avocado into nice little slices.

'I just think it would be easier if I never had to see this Roger-guy. I don't need to have some sort of relationship with him, it never goes well, does it?'

'I mean, if they stay together, you'll meet him at some point,' Dan says. 'Maybe it will be better to just get it over with.'

'I prefer to just stall things for as long as possible,' I say, slicing through the avocado a little more agitatedly. 'Forever, if I can.'

'Careful, Emma,' Dan says, frowning at the knife in my hand. I ignore him.

'I already know I'll fuck up. She'll get under my skin and then I'll say something I shouldn't and she will- Fuck!'

I should have listened to Dan. Distracted, I cut straight through the skin of the avocado, into my hand holding it. A little shocked, I drop the avocado and stare at the blood that's quickly welling up from the cut. The deep cut.