//Rafe Cameron\\
"You don't make deals with the devil, not unless you want to dance with him and maybe I did"
Lily Grant has spent her whole life slumming it with the pogues, being that she is one.
They're her day ones, her best friends. Life coul...
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Trigger warning: Rape
I slump out of bed, blinking my eyes repeatedly to rid them of the fuzzy layer of blur. Disoriented and nauseous.
My eyes are sticky from the eye makeup I finally fell asleep in. Most of it melted around my eyes from sweat. A thick layer coating my skin making me feel even more filthy. A low grumble of discomfort echos up my throat. Catching a glimpse of myself in the shattered mirror of the ugly teal bedroom. Smelling of weed, cigarettes and some cheap cologne. Along with some rotting smell or maybe it's mildew.
Kade's room always disgusted me. I myself am a messy person but he's just gross. Clothes scattered around the floor that haven't been washed in weeks. Ashtrays overflowing with ashes, cigarette butts and lose weed. Trash and old cans of beer stuck on every shelf and surface. It should disgust me and it does but the feeling of the filth surrounding me has nothing to do with the filth consuming me from the inside.
The reflection I catch of myself only adds to the hell burning beneath my flesh. My red hair lies in tangled waves. Scattered across my shoulders, still crimped from the braid it was in yesterday. The black smeared beneath my blood shot eyes blends sickeningly beautifully into the deep purple and green shades tinting my cheek.
Swollen with broken blood vessels painting a colorful bruise. I knew better than to tell him no, just like I knew better than to ever even contact him but I was too high to understand why I did it, or even remember it. But by the time I had awoken it was already morning, and it was already too late. I don't know if it was the pain or the drugs that took over but it doesn't really matter.
I can't get away from him now that he knows Rafe and I are over and that Rafe is out of town for now....or maybe he's gone forever. He's an adult, he's rich. He could up and leave and go where ever he wanted whenever he wanted to go.
Is he ever coming back?
What's your favorite color?
Green....
My lungs burn with every small attempt at a deep breath. Irritated from the smoke that consumed them last night. Oxy is a lot more potent than the smoke from weed..It's trace of use lingers lingers.
I think part of contacting Kade was in attempt to get more drugs. I was already so high that it didn't take much to tip my brain to the side that will do anything to get a fix. But I don't remember, I wouldn't know.
I don't remember much anymore, time passes slower than before, if I'm not high, I'm drunk. Both hindering the quality of my memory. The whole month feels like a blur and to make things worse, school starts next week.
