Thg one shots

All this time

KATNISS POV

I sit on the window sill in the living room watching the clouds slowly float across the blue sky. My eyes threaten to droop shut every now and then because of loss of sleep. My forehead rests against the glass and my knees press gently upon my stomach. My hair is falling in curls past my shoulders. The house is silent other than the small patter of buttercup roaming the empty house moaning for Prim. If only her method worked. All of a sudden I hear the door open and shut again a few seconds later. I don't even bother to turn my head. It's either Sae or Haymitch checking if I've killed myself yet. Both of them continually encourage me to go hunting or to go outside and see 12 as the new rebuilt 12 but I refuse them every time. I wonder if there will ever be a day when they give up on me. Or maybe they are waiting for my body to give up on me, waiting till I slip away before giving up completely. All of a sudden I hear his voice behind me. I haven't heard it as calm and peaceful in over a year. He says standing In my hallway

"Hey Katniss"

PEETA POV

I wake up the sound of someone knocking on the door. I groan and sit up and rub my eyes to clear my vision of that wake up blur. I get up out of bed and throw a t-shirt over my head. I make my way downstairs almost stumbling on the last few steps, still half asleep. The sun is streaming in through the two windows on either side of the door so I know its not necessarily early for most people. I open the door and find Haymitch, a surprisingly sober Haymitch.

"Hey boy"

Are you serious? What the hell is so important that he had to wake me for? I lean against the doorway and ask him the first thing that comes to my head
"What time is it?"
He laughs a bit and says
"I woke you? It's 10:30. Why aren't you up already?"
I reply almost coldly
"What's the point in getting up if I'm not getting up for anything or living for anyone either?"
He sighs and gives a quick shake of his head before saying.
"You shouldn't be thinking like that"
I say back quietly not looking at him
"I don't see how it makes a difference to you what I think"
I look at Haymitch. He's about to say something until I stop him
"Why are you here Haymitch? You usually don't call unless you're looking for liquor and that's usually in the evening when you've drank your daily supply"
He says
"I need someone to watch her for the day"
He nods his head to the house across the way. Katniss, he's talking about Katniss.
I say quietly
"I'm sure she's fine by herself Haymitch. Doesn't Ms Everdeen stay with her anyways?"
Haymitch shakes his head. I feel a lump form in my throat. Her mother left her. But then I remember that her mother was never the same after her father died. Now that Prim is gone she has nobody......nothing
"She's probably just upset Haymitch"
I say. I feel the lie almost scraping my tongue. Of course she's not just upset. She's worse.. He says to me
"Peeta that's a total understatement. She's depressed and on the verge of dying. She won't sleep,she won't eat, she doesn't move from her chair other than to shower or use the bathroom. She's refusing to accept she's gone, instead she wants to join her. Sae has been checking on her everyday. We're scared for her"
I feel my eyes sting slightly. The rebellion has burnt her out. The world is now a safe and peaceful place, and she wants out of it. I look down at my feet and say
"I really don't think her seeing me is going to improve her state"
I'm part of her pain. What I have done to her. The ways I've treated her. I feel sickly thinking that I've tried to kill her. Haymitch says calmly
"Boy, she needs you. You're all she has left"
I shake my head
"She doesn't want......"
He cuts me off
"You have to try"
I sigh. She doesn't want me.........She wants Prim. She wants her family back. I ask
"What about Gale?"
Haymitch gives me a small look of sadness when he says
"Didn't think twice before taking the opportunity to leave to district 2 for work"
I nod slowly. I guess I really don't have a way out of this. I respond quietly but Haymitch somehow picks it up
"What do you need me to do?"
------------------------------------------
I take a deep breath before slowly approaching her house. I hold a plate of warm cheese buns in my hand. I feel my sweaty palms desperately grasp the plate, hoping for it not to slip. I'm shaking slightly and feel uncomfortably nervous. I haven't seen her in months and most of our encounters from thirteen to the Capitol have mostly led to me having a flashback. I don't know what's more nerve wrecking, the guilt or meeting katniss herself. I haven't seen her in three months now. Not once has she left her home. I now stand directly in front of her door. I quickly Glance over at the primroses I planted a few months ago, in memory of prim. I once again inhale a deep breath and open the door as Haymitch told me that she won't dare answer the door. I walk in and shut the door behind me. I place the plate of cheese buns on the counter and walk around looking for Katniss. I eventually see her in the sitting room sitting on the windowsill, watching the world go by with her face blank of emotion. I decide its best to stay at the doorway. I gather up the courage and say
"Hey Katniss"
She glances at me and then turns back before asking hoarsely
"What are you doing here?"
It's harsh but I don't take offence to it.
I clear my throat before continuing
"Are you hungry? I brought cheese buns"
She just gives a slight shake of her head before leaning back and closing her Eyes for a minute. I sigh and walk back into the kitchen. I decide to clean it up a bit. I pull out a rag and wet it with some water and scrub inside the kitchen cabinets. As soon as that's done I put some washing up liquid on a sponge, wet it then start scrubbing inside the drawers. Then When I am cleaning the final drawer I come across something small and shiny. I pull it out and place it on my palm. It's a pearl. The pearl I gave Katniss in the quell. For a minute I stand still in the kitchen as the pearl sits on my palm. It feels warm, as if it has been held not long ago but at the same time it still has that cold sensation as if it is still possessed by the icy cold seawater it came from. She kept it. This whole time. I walk into the living room where she still sits almost lifeless. I approach her and sit across from her on the large window sill. I say softly
"Katniss"
She turns to me staring at me with those beautiful grey eyes that enchant me every time I gaze at them. I say
"You kept it.......all this time?"
She gives me a confused look until I show her the pearl resting on my palm. Then a small smile crosses her face. She looks out the window again and nods, the smile still sticking. It's small but still something. I ask her concerned
"Why? It's just a pearl?"
She continues to gaze outside while she says softly
"It's not about the pearl, more about the giver himself. Something to remember you by, during the times where I would see you on the TV and...."
I gulp. She means when I was in the Capitol. She continues with the smile growing smaller as sadness strikes her eyes yet she forces the tears away.
"The endless nights of crying myself to sleep and every dream of you holding me turning into a nightmare that was reality. So day and night I had the pearl. In my pocket during the rebellion and even in 13. It would give me hope, that even if you and I could never reach that friends point we were hoping for that I would still have a part of you. A part that Snow couldn't take.
It made me feel the smallest bit of safety, hope..........trust."
I'm shocked. It meant that much to her because I gave it to her?. I mean that much to her. I say quietly
"I never knew it meant that much to you"
She replies back even quieter
"I never knew until then how much you meant to me"
For the first time I can't find any words in my mouth. I mean something to her. She stirs a bit and then says quietly
"I'm gonna go"
She then gets up and starts rushing out of the room. I start to run after her. I let her go once I'm not letting her go again. I place the pearl on the counter. Just as she is about to open the door I say
"Katniss!"
She turns around. I do the first thing I can think of. I open my arms widely. For a minute she just stands there but then she smiles bigger then ever and starts to run towards me. And I run towards her. She jumps into my arms and wraps her legs tightly around my waist. Then I crash my lips against hers. Once we pull away for air we press our foreheads together. She smiles and I smile back. Her eyes are glistening with tears. I just need to know now. I whisper softly
"You love me? Real or not real?"
She smiles even more and as the tears flow done her face she whisper
"Real"
Then she crashes her lips against mine once again. She said real. It's finally real....