Begin Again [Wattys 2013 Finalist]

Chapter 52

 In September, four months after we found out that I was pregnant, I wake up in the morning in bed with Peeta, warmed by the soothing feeling of his rhythmic breathing on my neck. We've been to the doctor a couple of times before, but today we go to find out the gender of our baby. Peeta has one arm draped over my body and I whisper, "Good morning," to him with a sweet smile to wake him up slowly.

He flashes me a smile back and we go to get dressed. I open my drawer and grab my favorite pair of Capri pants. I pull them up and after struggling with the top button for a minute, I let out a sigh and give up. They don't fit my waist anymore. I pull on a pair of yoga pants and a tank top with a cardigan instead. As I stand in front of the fulllength mirror, braiding my hair, it become obvious to me that my belly is showing for the first time. I turn to the side and I can see a small bump protruding against my tight shirt. I'm immediately frightened at the idea that a human is growing inside of me, but I recover quickly.

"Peeta!" I say excitedly.

"What?" He asks, spinning around.

I gesture down to my slightly larger stomach with my hands.

"Oh my god Katniss you're showing!"

He runs over to me and is immediately down on his knees with his head on my stomach. I giggle and say,

"I know! I'm fat!"

He looks up at me and puts his hands on either side of my belly.

"You're beautiful," he responds.

I run my hands through his shiny blonde hair and drop to my knees to kiss him lightly on the lips. We end up sitting on the ground together. Peeta has his back against the footboard of our bed and I sit in between his legs with my back on his chest. His arms are wrapped protectively around me and his hands rest on the small bump on my stomach. It's small, but big enough to tell that I'm definitely pregnant. We haven't told anyone yet, but we're going to have to now considering that I'm showing.

"Wanna tell Haymitch and Effie after the doctor?" He asks, reading my mind.

"Yeah. We can have dinner with them. We should invite Delly too."

After breakfast leave early so that we can stop and buy maternity clothes for me. After shopping, we arrive at the doctor's office and sit down in the waiting room, nervously anticipating the moment when we will find out what gender out baby is. Peeta wants a girl. I want whatever he does. This is all for him. I hate doctor's offices, all of them, and he knows it. He takes my hand in his and rubs his thumb across it, numbing my thoughts ever so slightly. I still can't shake the thoughts of my mother and memories of the days I spent in hospital beds attached to a morphing drip. We finally go in to see the doctor and I get up on the examination table.

"Are you two ready to learn the sex of the baby?"

Peeta looks down at me questioningly and I glance up at him before smiling at the doctor and saying yes. I lift up my shirt and Peeta squeezes my hand as the doctor squirts on the blue ultrasound gel.

As the doctor rubs the ultrasound wand across my stomach, we see the video come up on the screen in front of us. This time, we can really see the form of a human displayed in front of us. I gasp and Peeta's smile widens.

"See the head?" The doctor asks, gesturing to the screen.

We both nod.

"Okay, well everything looks healthy and normal. And congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Mellark, you're having a girl."

I didn't think it was possible, but Peeta looks even happier. His smile stretches ear to ear and his eyes are sparkling. I sit up and he hugs me tight. I'm happy, but nervous. Always nervous. Nervous about being pregnant, because I never could have anticipated this and I'm still not used to the idea. When we walk out after thanking the doctor, the nervous feeling still lingers. I'm having a baby girl. Peeta's incredibly happy, which makes me happy in turn, but I can feel my heartbeat pounding in my chest. No, not just mine, the other one too. The heartbeat of my baby.

~

"I can't believe we're actually having a girl," Peeta says as we sit on the couch after preparing dinner. My back is resting up against one armrest and his is against the other. Our feet touch in the middle of the couch. I smile slightly and Peeta says,

"You're still nervous about it aren't you?"

I nod my head, staring down at my belly.

"I just don't know how I'm gonna be a mom."

"You'll be perfect," he says.

I'm not convinced, and no less scared. Peeta comes over to my side of the couch and squeezes in right next to me. He puts his hand on my stomach and says,

"I know you'll be perfect because you'll love this little girl with all your heart, just like I will."

I look into his eyes and I know that he's right. I'll love her like I've never loved before. But that's what scares me.

"Don't be scared. You're too strong for that," Peeta says.

I cuddle up next to him and press my back into his chest. He wraps his arms around me, leaving his hands on our baby. Resting his chin on my shoulder, he looks down at my stomach.

"Hi baby girl," he says to our unborn child.

I laugh, but he continues.

"It's your daddy! I'm so excited to meet you in five months. I bet you'll be just as pretty as your mother is."

I don't even let him finish. All of a sudden I have the overwhelming urge to kiss him. So I do. I press my lips to his and for a second he's stunned, but soon he kisses me back. We're sitting on the couch kissing when the doorbell rings. I let out an annoyed groan.

"Hormones much?" He asks.

"Oh, that's why." I say, slightly annoyed at the realization that my pregnancy hormones are sure to drive me crazy for him.

"I'm not complaining," he says with a smile.

"I am," I say as I roll my eyes and get up to answer the door. I'm wearing a long skirt with a shirt that's tight enough to make my stomach visible. Peeta comes up behind me as I open to door for Delly, Haymitch, and Effie. They can tell right away that I'm pregnant. Everyone's shocked, considering they've seen me recently.

"Oh my god Katniss!" Screams Delly as Effie wraps her arms around me so tightly I can't move.

"Surprise," I say.

"Wow! You're pregnant for real this time!" Says Haymitch.

"Yep," I say, smiling at his joke, which is rare.

"Congratulations," he says as he pats Peeta on the back.

I realize that I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be when we told everyone. As we eat and talk more about my pregnancy, I reassure myself in my mind that I shouldn't be scared. By the end of the night, I'm purely happy that I'm starting a family with the man who I love.