"Apollo."
I heard her voice and I was once again alive. They say you could never love a woman more than you could ever love yourself but I beg to disagree. The love I have for this girl is beyond me. It was as if, if it ever comes a moment where I was to be given at least a chance to choose whether I'd want to be with her in exchange for my life, I'd choose her. I'd be much willing to accept death than to see her love another man. I'd choose her over anything and I won't mind as long as she stays with me.
I'd ruin my life for her even though she already had.
The moment I saw her, I was confused. Who are you? What have you done to me? They say only fools believe in magic but what kind of sorcery is this? She has fated my soul to hers without even casting the spell. The moment I saw her smile, it annoyed me. Annoyed me to the point of cursing the guy who made her smile and why wasn't I the reason for it? I wanted her every smile. I'm no possessive because I make sure there's nothing to be possessive for but her smile, her smile is mine. I'd kill for that smile. The moment she glanced at me, I stopped. I caught my breath. For a second, I witnessed before me a work of heaven. She was breathtaking. She was beautiful.
So beautiful. It happened for a second before she gave her attention to the person she was talking to. I couldn't take it. I had to look away. Nobody would want to know about a man found dead with a smile. That's too much. But then I couldn't take it. I had to look again.
God, who is this beauty?
She sensed me. She glanced at me again. For the second time. I looked down. I bit my lip to stop myself from grinning. Fuck, did everybody see that? I looked around me. Did everybody fucking see that? She looked at me! She looked at me! Twice! Twice! Man, I'm fucked. I licked my lips and counted from 1, 2, 3...
I looked up again and saw her waving to her friends. Is she leaving? My shoulders hunched. I felt this hollow feeling inside me. It ached me. I hated this feeling. It was the same feeling I had when my mother left me. Is she going to leave? When do I get to see her again? I don't want to feel this again. Don't go. Please? Don't leave me.
Why is everyone leaving me?
Why won't anyone want to stay with me?
-
"Apollo, nasa'n ka ba? Kakain na tayo. Iinumin mo pa yung mga gamot mo. Apollo?"
I walked to the dining room as I hear the floor creaks each time I step on it. It's amazing how this old house can support my movement because I am quite big. I could reach the ceiling by tiptoeing, it was that quaint. I made a beeline to the kitchen to get my medicine before I went to her.
I smiled as I saw her fixing our plates. She looked up at me and smiled.
Just like before.
