Save Me From Myself

Chapter 30-Goodbye My Lover

Danny's POV

"My hands are cold, my body's numb...I'm still in shock, what have you done?"

I arrived at the mortuary in Tuscany half dead, half alive and drunk. Well, drunk was an understatement. I was intoxicated with alcohol and there was nothing Mark could do.

"Are you sure you don't want to go get some sleep? You can do this later...you know first some sleep and a shower and then do this...", tried Mark to convince me.
"No, I'm okay.", I said putting on my sunglasses.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes...let's get this over with."

Glen was already there waiting for us. Between the two of us you couldn't figure out who was more broken. Either me or him. Liv was right, I bottled up some feelings and they were surfacing right now with the speed of a bullet shot from a gun.

"They wouldn't let me in...they said you should come and..."
"Ok...", I said gripping on Glen's arm and shaking it vigorously.
"Dan...are you..."
"Drunk, yeah he is drunk...", said Mark.
"Quit acting like I'm a fucking baby! I'm fucking okay!", I retorted.

Just as I was about to curse a little bit more a police officer appeared followed by a coroner. He looked at me a bit panicked. After all, my expression, even with the sunglasses was fierce.

"Mr. O'Donoghue?"
"Yes...that should be me..."
"Giuliani Pazzo, chief of Police. Care to follow me?"
"Can he come?", I pointed out to Glen.
"As you wish...follow me."

Me and Glen followed him through the dark corridors until we were shown to a poorly lit, cold room. In the middle of the room was a steel table with a sheet that covered what I assumed to be what was left of Alexis. Right next to the steel table was another smaller one covered with utensils and having a plastic bag filled with something that seemed to be her belongings. The doctor stepped towards the steel table and uncovered the body.

The second Glen saw the lifeless body he fell to the ground, screaming like an animal. I stepped closer to her and took off my glasses.

"Is this your wife Mr. O'Donoghue?"
"Yes...this is Alexis O'Donoghue or at least what's left of her...can you give us a few moments?", I said making a short gesture towards Glen to hold it together.
"I must add that your wife died straight away...in the moment of the impact.", added the coroner.
"Of course, but is your friend alright?", asked the officer.
"He will be."

As we were left alone with her I got closer to her and gently started to pat her head.

"What did you do to yourself Alexis? What did you do to us?", I whispered in her ear as if she could reply back.
"What did you do to us? Dan!! She was with me, she was my responsibility, I let her..."
"It wasn't your fault. You didn't know...she was right, I should've fought for her...I shouldn't have let her go...But I thought she was going to be happy...it's no one's fault. Even in death she kept her smile...her patronising smile. As if she is defying us..."
"What will I do without my angel? What will I do without my life?", asked Glen kissing her cold hand.
"You will do what she would've wanted you to do. Move on. You will drum your ass out and you will go on tour and you're gonna cherish their memory by singing songs and doing what you're best at. Now let's get this over with!", I said hugging Glen tightly.
"Get what over with? Dan she was your fucking wife! Don't you have any feelings?"
"I do, I'm drunk as fuck right now, I'm trying to keep myself composed because if I lose it right now I might beat the shit out of somebody. I loved her Glen, she was my wife. Even after all this shit she died carrying my name. She was a fucking O'Donoghue!"
"Is Liv with you?"
"No, I want to be alone right now."

The funeral was kept quiet. Her body was cremated and the ash given to Glen. I didn't need too many witnesses and Glen agreed. I went to the hotel room holding the bag with her belongings. The only memory me and Glen had from her. The last things she touched before she died. Glen thought it would be a good idea for me to hang onto these stuff, just to have a reminder. I opened the bag and downloaded the content of it on the bed.