Band imagines

Alan Ashby imagine

TRIGGER WARNING; SELF HARM

ALAN'S P.O.V

"WHO'S READY TO CRACK OPEN THESE JACK DANIELS?" I hollered, holding both bottles in each of my hands.

"Shut up and let's turn up." Austin responded. I didn't wait a second longer to get to partying. My girlfriend,Y/N, wasn't exactly 'the party' type. Even though her and the band were close, she's still pretty shy when it came to socializing with them. She was in our bunk, most likely scrolling through Tumblr. I pulled out my phone to text her.

'Y/N come out! Please?'

'Babe whyyyy? You guys are having fun. I'm fine right here.'

'Come on you never come to our parties. It's just me and the guys so it's not really a party but still. Honey you'll be fine.' She always caved in when I called her pet names.

'Alright alright I'm coming damn it.'

I smiled to myself and put my phone back in my pocket. She hopped out of the bunk and joined the rest of us in the front lounge.

"Nice of you to join us Y/N." Austin announced, taking another sip out of his vodka.

"Yeah um, thanks Austin. So...what've you guys been up to?"

"Waiting for you." I admitted. I feel like she never really spent time with the guys, so this was the perfect opportunity to do so.

*A couple hours later*

Y/N'S P.O.V

You witnessed all the guys asleep on either side of the bus, including Alan. Alan pretty much knew everything about you, except for one thing.

Your scars.

You've struggled with self harm for the past two years now and it's gotten out of hand. You had cuts pretty much everywhere; stomach, thighs and most of all, your wrists. You began to get undressed for bed. since the guys were all asleep, you decided to undress right in front of them. I mean... no one will catch you right?

ALAN'S P.O.V

I opened my eyes slightly to all the guys knocked up and Y/N beginning to change into her PJ's. Hey I can enjoy this view. She removed her shirt and her jeans. Wait. something's not right. I witnessed scars practically everywhere on her body. Why wouldn't she tell me about this? She looked in my direction so I shut my eyes as fast as I could, making it look like I was asleep. A few seconds later, she turned around and hopped into our bunk. I really have to have a talk with her in the morning.

Y/N'S P.O.V

When you woke up, all the guys were off to the studio, except for Alan. He was right where you left him last night. He looked a little...uneasy this morning. You finished brushing your teeth and sat next to him. Concerned, you asked him, "Is everything alright?"

"Y/N...why?"

"Huh? Why what?"

"Don't play stupid. I saw them yesterday."

"I really don't know what you're talking about Alan." He took a deep breath before replying again.

"Y/N I saw those cuts on your body yesterday. I just wanted to know why you never told me. But then again, it's all making sense. Why you never wear shorts that go above your knees, or why you never want to go swimming...I mean did you think I'd judge you?"

"...Kinda." He looked at you with sadness in his eyes. You couldn't help but let the tears roll down your face. "I'm so s-orry Alan." You sobbed. Alan wrapped his big arms around you and whispered in your ear. "Sh, it's okay."

"Y/N listen to me. There's nothing to be ashamed of. I know your past. I understand how hard everything's been. But you don't have to resort to this anymore. You have me. You have the guys and you have your fans. Please please please promise me you won't cut your beautiful body anymore."

"...Alan I-"

"Please."

"I promise." You whispered. You crashed your head into Alan's shoulder and let him rub your back, just the way you like it. "Can we flush them down please?"

"Of course baby girl." You walked into your bunk and gathered your blades together. Each blade represented something different. You threw one in;

"This is for making me feel ugly."

You threw another in.

"This is for making me feel useless."

You threw the last one in.

"Most of all. For making me feel unloved." You flushed them down as Alan had a tight grip around your waist. You turned around, facing him.

"I love you Y/N, don't forget that."

"I love you too Alan."