Miss You

Chapter 28. Confident

I was due to leave for Paris in 2 days and I was super excited. When I told Nate, he was overjoyed and could not stop telling me how proud he was of me. Dreeana and Haven we're also coming to watch the show and my mom of course. I was chilling at Nate's condo and getting my stuff organized.

"How's my little designer doing?" Nate asked as he sat down next to me on the couch.

"I'm doing good" I replied. "And yourself?" 

"I'm great, you know I actually can't wait to see you model your stuff. You're just amazing Alaysia."

"Thanks babe."

"No problem, people won't be able to get enough of you after the show. You are pretty unforgettable." He said, as my smile faded.

"I don't know..." I said suddenly feeling anxious and nervous.

"What do you mean you don't know?" He asked with a confused look on his face.

"I just do not know Nate. What if people don't like my designs?" I asked quietly. 

"They'd have to be crazy to not like your designs. I like your designs and I'm a man." He chuckled. 

"Aw.. thanks, but I'll see about that. I have never been to Paris before, so that will be something new."

"Yeah, me neither. New is good."

"Yeah, that's true I guess...."

"Alaysia, why are you suddenly so nervous?" Nate asked and I could see the concern on his face.

"I don't know. This is a dream I have always had, designing my own clothes, but now it's a reality and I absolutely do not think I am ready." I said with a sigh.

"Alaysia." Nate said putting his arms around me as I rested my head on his muscular chest.

"Yeah?" I asked getting teary eyed.

I hate getting emotional.

"You are strong, beautiful, talented and more. You are definitely ready. I know it and I know you know it too."

"I know it, but I just cannot seem to show it." I said bursting into tears.

"Please do not cry." Nate said while wiping my tears.

"I'm sorry. I just feel so pressured now. Ms. LaBelle is expecting me to be perfect, so is Jean and Gigi and everyone else. What if I cannot do that?" I questioned, hoping he had the answers.

"Would you please stop with the 'what if'. There is not such thing as 'what if' anymore. It is 'when'. When you do a perfect job at the show." He reassured me as I came to a realization.

"Okay.. you're right. Why am I wasting time crying when I could be rehearsing or something?"

"Exactly! There is no time for negativity and tears. It's time to show people what you can do because you and I both know there is a lot you can do."

"Thank you Nate. Sometimes my confidence drops and I need some reassurance. So thank you, I love you so much." I said hugging him tightly.

"That is why I am here. I love you too." He said and kissed my forehead.

"Everyone is going to love my designs because I worked very hard. It's going to be great." I exclaimed with all the confidence I had within me.

"Ay... that's my girl. That is the confident and bold Alaysia I know."

"Thanks babe, Alaysia May Joelson is back in business!" I said and threw my hands in the air enthusiastically.

"Yes and I am very happy about that." Nate said with a huge smile on his face as we burst into laughter.

"Hey, you wanna play a game?" I asked since I wanted to do something else besides discuss my issues.

"Sure, what game?" Nate asked.

"I spy." 

"Okay, I will go first." He replied.

"I spy with my little eye something that is....green."

"Okay.."I said as I looked around for something green, " is it the plant?" I asked.

"Yes it is." He replied.

"Okay I spy with my little eye something that is very ugly." I said with a smirk.

"Okay I don't know." 

"It's you haha." I said jokingly.

"Oh you're gonna pay for that one." He said as he started tickling me.

"No, please stop..."I begged while laughing as he tickled me relentlessly.

"What do you have to say first?" 

"I'm sorry and you're not ugly, you're very beautiful." I said as I laughed and continued to try and hold his hands to stop them from tickling me.

"You're a lucky girl." He said as he stopped tickling me. "Now I know that you're ticklish."

"That hurt..."I said with my best pouty face.

"Aw poor baby girl,I am sorry. Do you want some milk in your bottle?" He asked jokingly.

"No. I'm good, but you won't be because it's your turn to pay."

"Oh yeah? What are ya gonna do?" He said trying to tease me. He looked so attractive when he was trying to be a tease.

"Nothing, just kiss me." I said as he looked at me with a surprised look on his face. "Kiss me Nate!" I said a bit louder.

"Alright." He said as he leaned over and placed his lips on mine. "Was that payback?" He asked afterwards.

"No, I just wanted to kiss you." I said and walked upstairs to pack for my trip.