Crown of Thorns ||BVB a.u.|| (DISCONTINUED)

XIII: Confront and Avoid

{Andrew}

That was... Less than satisfactory. The sex with that girl was great, as sex always is. But it didn't help how I'm feeling. I feel worse actually. The void somehow feels larger.

I continue to lie in bed and stare at the ceiling while the girl makes herself presentable and gets back to work. My crimson sheets draped over my lower half just so, and the glimmer of sunlight peaked through the window. Night was drawing near as the sunset was wrapping up the show. I appreciate it while it lasts though. The sun, it shone over the kingdom and mountains, and danced across the ocean. It couldn't be possible for anyone to not that the time and sit and watch. To appreciate...

Yes. To appreciate... Which I haven't been doing, have I? My god, I must be an imbecile. No wonder I feel like this heaviness on my heart is too much to handle. I'm not appreciative of what I have— who I have. I'm an absolute idiot to not want to marry. These nerves are nothing but what they are.

I toss the sheet off of my body and put my trousers and tunic on. I struggle, hopping around, trying to put my boots on. After falling on my ass and pulling them on. I clumsily stumble my way out the door and go on my search. Up and down every hall and corridor, peering into every door, looking high and low.

I turn a corner and see her walking by herself. "Arabella!" She turns, facing me, then back around just as quick. "Arabella!" I quicken my pace, as does she. I stop. "As your future king, I command you to stop!"

She stops dead in her tracks.

I come around her, holding her shoulders. "What is the matter?"

"Unhand me," she mutters, looking down.

"Pardon?"

"I said, unhand me!"

"What have I done? Was it because I've been cold? I am sorry, really. I was going through a bit of a crisis about marriage, but I had a revelation: I'm in love with—" she's still looking down, and I don't appreciate that. "Look at me when I'm speaking to you," I say through gritted teeth as I  grip her chin and force her to look into my eyes.

Her eyes were glittering in the dim candlelight of the hall. Her cheeks were puffy as well as her eyes, as if she was crying. "Let me go, or I'll scream."

Without thinking, I pull her close and kiss her. I feel her start to sink into it, but she immediately pushes me off. She was hurt for some unknown reason. I can tell by the way she's just staring at me. She shakes her head and runs off once again, leaving me alone in the dark.

{Arabella}

"He did what?!"

"Alexander, calm down. Please," I rest my hand on his shoulder.

"I am sorry, dear sister, but I can't stand idly by. H-He fucking servants— not even discreetly, might I add— and he makes your lips impure by force! No, I won't stand for this!" He exclaims, pacing my room.

"Alexander, please!"

He sighs and looks at me. "You really want me to do nothing?"

"Well," I shift, "he was rambling to me about... About how he was nervous but realized he supposedly loves me."

He scoffs, laughing at me. "You don't believe that, do you?"

"What is that to mean?" I frown.

"Never mind. You're too simple minded to understand." He sits on my bed and looks out my window into the darkness of the night. "You don't love him, do you?"

"I don't know," I say quietly. "I didn't think I did, I just thought we were good friends. When I caught him, I don't know why I was so...hurt."

"Don't be so naïve."

"What is the matter with you?" I groan. "Just a week prior, the two of you were acting like brothers."

"I had a change of heart, so to speak. But no matter! Do what you want, it's your life. Just know I'll do what I please as well." 

"You sound just as stubborn as Father," I roll my eyes. 

He frowns and looks down at his feet. "I am nothing like Father."

I sigh and rest my head on Alexander's shoulder. He reaches up and begins to stroke my hair. "I haven't the slightest idea on what I am to do... I just want to go home."

"This is your home, Arabella... Besides, you always know what to do. Just listen to your gut." 

He kisses my forehead and stands to leave. I stop him before he reaches the door. "Tell Hamish to meet me outside in the gardens. I must speak with him." Alexander nods and leaves. Once I'm alone, I rush to my trunk and start to gather my gear. I need to clear my mind. I need to train.