I slept in, it was about 12:39 in the afternoon when I woke up, I didn't like this, I crept downstairs, no one was here, even Jeff, Grandma Tracy and my uncle were gone, I was alone, I was so cold, I decided to return to bed, I slipped under the covers, Lady Penelope won't mind, she's probably out, why didn't anyone wake me, am I that unimportant, I started crying, why does no one want me.
"And you're super amazing boyfriend is back" I jumped when Virgil opened the door suddenly "baby, what's wrong, are you hurt, is anything broken, are you alright."
I cried harder and I hugged him when he sat down next to me, I felt so lonely, I was never included in anything.
"I thought you left me, I thought you and your brothers went out without me, you could have woken me, you useless sh*t" I sobbed and hit his chest repeatedly with my shaking fists "don't ever do that to me again."
"I was kinda forced to look after Grandma when she went shopping and Scott and Alan needed to respond to a distress call, your uncle, dad and Lady P went to do some International Rescue business and Gordon, well I have no idea where he went, he's probably out somewhere, spying on Dad's meeting because of his crush on Lady Penelope and all" Virgil explained quietly, trying to soothe me "you know I would never leave you on purpose, I'm sorry I scared you sweetheart."
"You better be sorry, I didn't mean to hit you" I whispered and nuzzled him.
"Hey it's cool, I'm mainly used as a punching bag whenever Kayo is on her period, to be honest" aww he's so cute.
"Wow, maybe that explains why she can kick your ass so well" I laughed.
"Shut up, right are you getting up or not" why do I have to answer him due to the way he treated me yesterday.
I slapped him, there that's for yesterday.
"I'm not talking to you, why do you always flirt with other girls when I'm around, the least you could do is spare me the decency and do it when I'm not there" I huffed and crossed my arms.
"I'm sorry, it's fun to be honest, and don't think I haven't noticed it when you check other guys out" Virgil replied with a frown, rubbing his cheek with his hand.
"That's the thing, I don't check other guys out because I'm too busy staying faithful to your stupid manwh*re of an ass" I growled.
"Well it's not my fault you're frigid and don't respond to my advances!" Virgil yelled at me.
"I'm sorry, I should go" I whispered quietly and left the room in a hurry, how could he call me frigid after he knows that I can't do that with him anymore, he practically forced himself on me in the shower.
I sat down in one of Lady Penelope's chairs, Sherbet ran up to me and he sniffed me, I picked him up and placed him on my lap. I felt violated and upset.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that" it's too late now.
I ignored him, if he doesn't understand that his words hurt me then why should I even protest, he sat down next to me and he pulled me closer to him, I could feel the heat radiating off his body.
"I know you don't love me anymore, just break up with me if your needs aren't satisfied" I whispered, I struggled out of his grip and I went back upstairs, I roamed the empty large halls, I felt sh*tty, like usual.
"Olivia wait, please don't, it's not about that, I mean I can sacrifice that-" I cut him off, I kissed him.
"That's the problem, you can't, you're not the sort of person who can live without it honey, I'm sorry, you'll be better off without me, plus you should find a girl you can have sex with that won't burst into tears during it because of her past" I mumbled and walked away.
I opened the door to the pastel rose coloured room I was staying in, I felt awful.
"I'm still your boyfriend, no matter if we have sex or not, I might become your husband in the future as well, I actually notice when you seem upset, I always ask you if you want to keep going and you keep saying yes and forcing me to continue, I don't like seeing you upset, just please be honest with me, I'm always up for cuddling instead, kitten" ugh why is he so stubborn and persistent.
*3 hours later*
Lady Penelope has her own private beach resort thing, she's officially the coolest person I've ever met, I felt a little self conscious about my scars but I was wearing a really cute swimsuit so what the heck I look adorable, I forgot to put sunscreen on, it was really sunny today, suddenly I felt two hands on my shoulders.
"Can I help you" I asked whoever it was.
"Yes, put sunscreen on or sit in the shade with Alan" Virgil muttered, I decided to put some sunscreen on, I couldn't reach my back so he helped me.
"Thanks" I smiled slightly.
"No problem, you look really cute in that swimsuit by the way" Virgil returned the smile, he went to go and talk to Scott, if I follow him around he'll get annoyed.
I placed my hands in the sand, I felt so lonely still, I just wish that we could spend a whole day together, no sexual feelings, no distractions, just us being able to talk, there was so much I wish I could tell him but I swore to myself that I'd keep quiet about it, I don't want to hurt him. I decided to go indoors, I felt sick, when will my misery end, when can I just forget about my past.
I poured myself some water, I turned my wrist to see the scars I had inflicted on myself, I'm just nothing but a weak and measly little coward, I can't handle anything, I should just stick to what I'm good at, just being a girl who sits there quietly adding no valid input to any conversation, I finished my drink and I slammed the glass down on the side, Kayo is perfect, she's everything I wish I could be, at least Scott and Alan admire her, they look up to her because of her perseverance, no one looks up to me, no one admires me for anything, oh what the heck who wants to admire a girl who can get through a thick hardcover book in two days and study for 36 hours straight, let's face it, I have no purpose in International Rescue apart from standing there and looking pretty, I wanted to punch something.
"You're such a dork you know that right" I heard Kayo laugh.
"I know I've been told that numerous times by Olivia" why is Virgil talking to her.
"To be honest I think she's a tiny bit annoying, she always cries when something goes wrong, I just don't understand her" Kayo sighed.
"Don't say that, you don't understand what she's been through, if I wasn't the way I am now I would have cried about that mission failure" I heard Virgil mutter
"Yes but you're not like that anymore, with a little bit of training she can learn not to cry" those words stung, I should have become emotionless long ago, why can't I do anything right.
*See? Even your sister makes fun of you* the voice in my head growled
"Shut up" I muttered, I clenched my fist.
Why can't I end it all now.
[I'm gonna be taking a small break for a few weeks I'll be back when I have a few new ideas, sorry]
YOU ARE READING
Painful pasts and terrible truths
Fanfiction[sequel to The Tracy Family Feud] Olivia finally plucks up the courage to tell the brothers about her past and her family life, could this have devastating effects on her relationship with the one person who cares for her and looks out for her
