Think Don't Speak (BOOK ONE)

C H A P T E R 15

I quickly turned my head in the direction of the door and saw Tyler standing there twiddling with his thumbs looking at me with a sad frown on his face. "Oh i didn't know you were there." I stumbled my words out to him. "Yea i figured since you started to sing." My cheeks felt like they were on fire as he began to walk in, making sure to shut the door without taking his eyes off of me. I moved over onto the side of my bed to make room for him to sit as he sat down next to me.

He sat there next to me in silence for a minute before speaking. "You have a really good voice." He said hiding his face in hand knowing that he was blushing from being nervous. Why nervous? Especially in front of me. I gave him a short and sweet smile knowing that he couldn't see and replied. "Thank you, your voice is amazing though." I said remembering when i had heard a sneak peek of his voice. "Oh, you um, you weren't suppose to hear that." He said lifting his hand away from his face and looking at the floor in embarrassment. I let out a soft giggle before questioning. "Why?" He gave me a smile, "Um well, i don't sing much." He said trying to come up with an excuse, "But you were writing a song." I argued but with a smile. "Just trying out a new hobbie." I didn't believe him but still went with it anyways. I saw his smile slowly fade as he let out a long sigh. "Why didn't you tell us?" He asked. I was confused by his question so i just stayed silent. "I mean how could someone like you ever want to do that to yourself?" I could hear the crack in his voice as he asked me the question.

I knew now what he was talking about and thought about it for a second. "It was a while ago, i don't want to talk about it." I complained shrugging and turning my attention towards the floor. i could tell he was frustrated by the tone in his voice, "Well somebody has to know about this." Tyler said getting up from his spot and walking towards the door. "Like who? Ollie?" I said with a nervous tone. "Yes." Tyler said opening the door. "Wait no please Tyler don't tell him! Ill tell him! Just please!" I pleaded to Tyler. He let out a sigh. "Fine you better tell him!" I felt a tear run down my face, why was this so hurting for me? Why did I feel like if I showed Ollie that i use to cut, something terrible would happen? Would he hate me? Would he punish me? Would he think I'm insane and send me to a mental hospital? All these questions ran through my mind when I realized that Tyler left and Ollie was now in the room.

Ollie looked at me with a worried look and rushed over in aid. He sat down next to me and pulled me into a hug. His hug was gentle but yet tight as he squeezed the juices out of me as I gasped for air. "Sorry." He whispered letting go of me. I nodded my head. "What's wrong? what happened?" He asked wiping tears away from my face. "Nothing just thinking." I said with tears in my eyes. "To deep into bad thoughts?" He asked as if its relatable. I nodded knowing I was lying to one of the most trust worthy people I know. "Hey how about I go get you a snack?" He asked, I was pretty hungry actually so I nodded my head wondering what he would bring back as he left the room in a snap. I laid back in my bed while taking deep breaths until I felt much more calmer and less emotional. I stared at the ceiling thinking about what Tyler had said. When would I tell Ollie anyways? When would be a good time? Maybe when he's in a happy mood? wait no then his mood will turn sad and it will be my fault! maybe when he's upset or not In the mood? But then Maybe that will make him scarier. I don't want that.

I took another deep breath after my last one when I heard Ollie walk in. "I made you some tuna and crackers." Ollie said handing me the crackers and tuna while taking a seat on my legs. The thought of tuna made my stomach growl in hunger. I quickly munched down while Ollie played with some of my stuffed animals that were laying around. "What's their names?" He asked looking up at me with his curious Green eyes. I looked over at the stuffed animals he held and answered, "Sofie and Tiger." He gave me a smile and scrunched up his face while hugging the toys and doing a dance at the same time. I gave him a giggle when he stopped. He sat the animals down on my floor when he heard Tyler's yell for him, "Oliver! Come on we gotta go get ready!" Ollie rolled his eyes and blew me a kiss before leaving the room to go do what ever Tyler and him were going to do. "Bye!" I yelled to Ollie down the hall. "See ya!" Ollie yelled back before I heard Tyler's door open and shut. I laid back on my side and stretched my arms before turning my lamp off that was sitting in my desk beside me. The room soon went dark and all I could hear was the sound of Tyler's voice and Ollie's voice talking. I rested my eyes feeling that I might get a good night sleep that night. I felt my body relax to the peace all around, but then I heard something. This something quickly made my eyes burst open to how loud it was, I knew I heard drums coming from the other room.