Brown sugar and Lavender

Chapter thirty one: Tragedy becomes us prt.2

Meredith's POV:

"She's alive!" The words left my mouth, music to my ears. In seconds, paramedics were checking her out, feeling her pulse and loading her onto a stretcher for emergency transportation to the hospital.

I jumped in the back of the ambulance and immediately began barking orders.

"Get some warmed saline! She needs blankets! Someone run a central line and tube her! Put pressure dressings on the wounds on her legs! Check to see if her abdomen is rigid!"

The paramedics, terrified (rightly so) of me in my completely savage state, did exactly as I said, while I held her hand and kept a stethoscope on her chest to make sure the faint but present thump of her heart kept on going.

She needed to live for me, and I knew if she died right here in my arms on my table, I'd never forgive myself.

When we arrived at the hospital, she tanked. Her pressure went down, and her heart began to stop.

"Dammit Addison!" I swore "push ten of epi, get me the paddles!" Someone pushed the epi while someone else handed me some paddles. I coated the metal in cool blue gel and ripped her shirt apart to get to her chest.

"Clear!" I screamed, before pressing the paddles firmly against her chest and shocking her. The beep of the heart rate monitor went back to normal, and her heart began to speed up again.

"Alright, let's get her to Bailey, someone page neuro, we need to get her into CT and MRI and X-Ray NOW!" I demanded, as we rushed her off the ambulance and into the hospital.

I looked down at her, she was so so pale. Her hair was matted with blood and her eyes were shut. A tube was down her throat, because we didn't know how well she'd do breathing on her own. And judging by how well she was holding up since we left the docks, my money was on not very well.

Bailey, upon seeing me with my close to dead wife, demanded I go and wait in the waiting room while she took care of it.

"All due respect, Bailey, but if you don't get the hell out of my way so I can get her to CT, so help me god I will knock you down" I snapped.

She raised an eyebrow and gave me the 'look'. The look Bailey always got when she was being challenged by someone.

"Meredith Grey where do you get off talking to me like that? Now get in the waiting room before I have your job" she yelled, trying to take the gurney with my wife on it away from me.

"Jesus Christ, take my job I don't give a fuck! But take my wife and I swear to god Bailey I'll end you myself" I scream "now either help me, or have the nurses page someone who will!"

Bailey gave me a hard look, before taking in another breath to speak. I cut her off before she could even get a breath out.

"Bailey you have to understand. She's the love of my life, if she dies, I die. I can't live without her, I've tried and I've failed. I have to make sure she lives because if I hand her over to you and something happens, I won't forgive myself" I beg.

She takes in a breath before talking "if she does on your table, you really think you'll forgive yourself for that?" She asks, raising an eyebrow.

"If she dies on my table, I'll be miserable. But at least I'll know I did every possible thing in the world. I won't stop until she's okay and if it's impossible for her to be okay then I guess I'll have to figure out what to do then"

Bailey sighs, then moves out of my way.

"Bring me the results of her CT and MRI. I'm paging cardio and nuero and booking an OR" Bailey sighs.

Right as I'm about to rush off, she stops me.

"And Meredith?" She tells me "if she dies, I'll have you personally fired and charged with murder" she snaps.

I laugh "if she dies, I have no intentions of making it out of here alive"

~

After coding two more times and a slight delay in which a lung collapsed and I had to put in a chest tube, I finally had Addie's MRI and CT scans.

"She's got a brain bleed at the back of her head" Bailey murmured "it's small, probably won't do any damage, but it's there. She's got four broken ribs, a collapsed lung, her right hip and left elbow are both out of socket, she broke her elbow and her ankle and her wrist, not to mention all the internal bleeding and I've got no sweet clue where it's coming from" Bailey signed, as we scrubbed to go in the OR.

"Who's coming from neuro?" I ask, drying my hands.

"We paged-" suddenly, the door opens and Derek of all people walks in.

"I'm here" he says before starting to scrub in himself.

"Jesus Christ why is he here?" I demand.

Bailey shrugs "I paged the head of neuro, they sent the head of neuro"

"He's supposed to be in New York!"

Derek sighs "I got back today to pick up some things, I'm supposed to be leaving tomorrow night but when I came to the hospital Richard told me he needed the best of the best on this case"

"That" I say, looking him straight in the eye "is my wife on that table. The love of my life and the absolute apple of my eye. If she dies because you fuck up, I'll kill you myself" I tell him, before going in the OR.

~

The surgery was long; Derek, despite being the biggest asshole I've ever met, actually did a wonderful job fixing the first brain bleed and fixed the second one he found while fixing the first. It was small enough that a MRI didn't show it clearly.

Bailey had managed to fix all the internal bleeding right after Callie popped her hip and elbow back into place. Addie's small intestine, her liver, her appendix and one kidney were all bleeding into her stomach, but Bailey fixed it all, having to take out her kidney and her appendix. I didn't mind, though. Those were things Addie could live without, and Addie was something I couldn't live without.

The brain bleed was the worst.

The surgery didn't take as long as it could've, and Derek said it went smoothly. But it was terrifying.

I wouldn't let him shave her head; she'd have a stroke the second she woke up and saw all her ginger locks in the garbage. I knew Addie better than I knew myself; the hair stayed unless it absolutely had to go.

"Meredith, it would be easier to just shave it off" Derek said, as he prepped for the surgery "it won't get in the way then"

"The bleed is at the base of her head, almost down by her neck" I point out on the scan "you can pin it up and still be able to easily do the surgery"

"Are you saying this because it's what Addie would want or because it's what you want?" He muttered under his breath.

I wanted to punch him, I really did.

But that was Addie's job.

"If it was up to me she'd be bald and you'd be cracking her head right now" I try to keep my cool, knowing that freaking out on Derek right before he cut open my wife like a cantaloupe isn't a wise move "but Addie spends more time on her hair than she does on anything else. She loves it, it's her favourite feature about herself. I don't want to take that away" I sigh.

"Her favourite feature, huh?" He raises an eyebrow, and again, I want to sock him more than I've ever wanted anything in my entire life. Luckily I have some, very little but still some, self restraint.

"I like her eyes" I'd said, opening the door to the OR "they've always been my favourite"

A/N- so Addie's OKAY
Honestly did you think I'd kill off my favourite character? Hell nah

Thanks for reading!! Please vote and comment!!'

~Daisy