It Could Have Gone That Way; A Harmione Fanfiction

Chapter 17: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

"You'd better hope that Creevey doesn't meet Ginny, or they'll be starting their own Harry Potter fan club!" Ron chuckled.

"Shut up!" The last thing Harry wanted was for Lockhart to hear the words 'Harry Potter fan club'.

Harry and Hermione had just joined Ron in Defence Against the Dark Arts class. They had explained exactly what had happened with Colin and Lockhart to him, so Ron seemed to have lost all anger towards Harry whatsoever, thankfully, as an angry Ron was not something that anyone would want to deal with. Each student had on their desks a seven-book-high mountain of Lockhart's 'successes' as he called them.

"I," Lockhart's snooty voice flooded the room, silencing everyone,"am Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defence League and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most-Charming-Smile Award - but lets not talk about all that. I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at her!" He waited for a laugh that never came. Shaking it off, Lockhart continued,"I see that you have all managed to bring my complete book set - well done! Alrighty then, I thought we'd start today off nice and easy with a little quiz, just to see how much you have all taken in." He strode elegantly around the room, passing out thick wads of parchment, his sapphire robes billowing behind him at his speed,"You have thirty minutes. Begin!"

Hurriedly, Harry flipped his paper over and read the first few questions.

1. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favourite colour?

2. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?

3. What - in your opinion - is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?

"That pompous little prat!" Harry heard Hermione exclaim under her breath. She was right; the paper seemed never to end. On and on these questions went, until:

54. When is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday, and what would his ideal gift be?

Half an hour later, Lockhart sat at his desk, flipping through the papers in front of the class.

"Hmm...tut tut - hardly any of you remembered that my favourite colour is lilac." He drawled. Lockhart went through each question, telling the class what they should have put and exactly where to find the answer in his books,"Oh dear, it seems you could all have read my books a bit more thoroughly...that is, of course, except from Miss Hermione Granger. She knows my secret ambition is to rid the world of evil and market my own range of hair-care products - good girl! In fact...full marks! Miss Granger?"

Hermione raised a hand.

"Excellent!" Lockhart beamed,"Truly perfect! Take ten points for Gryffindor." After quickly passing the marked papers out again, Lockhart scurried over to his storage cupboard to get some extra things out for his lesson.

Ron and Harry both turned and shot Hermione incredulous looks.

"What?"

"I thought you couldn't stand Lockhart!" Harry said, bemused,"You called him a pompous little prat!"

"I do hate him, but that isn't going to stop me from trying to do well on his quiz, is it?"

"Well," Ron shrugged,"I dunno. I just thought that, maybe, if you hated him so much, you wouldn't try so hard to learn about all of the things he's done. Especially if you think they're fake."

Hermione cocked her head to the side,"I really do hope you realise, Ron, that this test will count towards our overall grade." She sniffed,"Even if it is complete and utter rubbish."