The Fault In Our Minds

Fault 12

I hit his nose. He reacts the same way a dog would. It's just more adorable.  "You are a liar. Why would you ask of that one precisely?"
"It's just really vague. You come off asexual. And sorry if I'm offending you."
I shrug. "Not at all. I never went on play dates or anything above that. All this sexuality stuff is new to me."
    A part of me wishes Ash and Stacey would call. This moment is utterly unbelievable. I might never get this opportunity again. This probably a message from some cloud screaming at me for avoiding so much of what Josh brought.
"I dislike you for the moment. Just because you're the cliché guy changing that corrupted girl."
    Even with the lights out I can still feel like those eyes are swallowing me. I must have said something to upset him.
Josh uttered, "Ryan, you're the one doing the changing. I probably can't change you. Maybe you're just doomed to be a desperate suicidal teenager. I'm just not the one who step into your life redecorating everything." It was much more than an utter. I lay on my back.
"It's no fair. There wasn't supposed to be a prince charming. I hate all this cliché stuff. I want to meet my parents but they don't want me."
    I pull myself under the covers and pout about unnecessary emotions. Josh kisses my forehead and describes his crush. From what he said she's a blonde, just inches taller than me, gray foggy eyes with a petite frame. I was convinced it was me but I'm not petite and I don't have blonde hair. Not to mention she's optimistic which is by the farthest not my personality.
    It slaps me like a hardcover book. The person he was describing was not only my associate but old friend. I beat him with a pillow. "Stacey really? She's unworthy and not even trust worthy."
"You're probably just jealous," he says back. I cover the pillow with hope of him suffocating. Josh only pushes my chin away and my body falls back. I cover my face and scream. Am I really throwing a tantrum over something like this?
"Ryan you can't be throwing a tantrum like this. We're only friends."
   I hate that sentence. 'We're only friends.' For the most part it was true but nothing is true when my emotions are all in the wrong slots. I push Josh out the bed, his body thumps against the floor.
"Ryan knock it off. I'm not going to try anything any way. She already likes someone. But it's nice to see you care."
"I hate you."
He mouths, "Tell me another lie."
"I hate you."
 
I make it seem like I went to sleep. Josh went on with a conversation about my toddler behavior. When I feel the bed sink I use his arm as my pillow again.
    Truthfully I wanted a lot of attention but not to the point I'd do something completely irrational. It's probably best I stay single. I'll probably debate on trapping them in a spider web for all their days. I roll over and put my head on his chest. It takes him by surprise by his sudden jump. The arm that was once my pillow is now rubbing the top of my head.
"You know I was lying when I said that. Stacey wasn't even close."
"Good I would have killed you. I hope you're prepared."
Josh askes, "For the fact I was talking about you that entire time."
I'm asleep.

Josh does take up my advice and finish up the remaining interviews and we head for the road for the next place. I tell Josh Stanford, Connecticut. Ash and Stacey were deeply sleeping. Our next bathroom or food stop we'd need to pick up water. Ash needed it drown out the taste of throw up. Both of them was nauseous; lucky the road was smooth. I nor Josh had said anything to each other. This silence was better than awkward silence. My awkwardness clashed with Josh's angry facial expression. What a nice fusion?
"Interesting isn't it?"
"What is?" I ask and look around for anything I missed.
"You are. This will be strange but I want to make a suicide pact with you." The words sound sound honest and ignore it. I wouldn't be making a suicide pact with anyone. If I wanted to take my life it would be my decision.
"You aren't ignoring this."
"Oh I am" I say.
"Ryan." Josh picks up the speed.
"Josh it has nothing to do with you."
"Yes it does" he snaps. "Who wants to come into second period and have Mr.Issac explaining how you killed yourself? That you won't be sitting in that same seat and some exchange student is going to sit there all happy with their head in the clouds."
    What does he want from me? This car ride is my trip to hell. I must give Josh a coin for taking me through rivers I'd have to face. We aren't even close to hell.
"Sometimes the best type of love is the incompatible one," and he continues to drive now. I'm acting like I don't find him adorable. Feelings are such a pain. Especially these feelings. Of course I get what he's saying. But I might not want to accept it.

We stop for a bathroom break. I stay in the car with Josh. I hope one of them gets water. I find myself very dehydrated. Dehydrated and sweaty. The possibility of me getting sick I'd unmistakably large.
"I'm sorry," Josh states.
"Don't be. You're only trying to help sort of."
"Yeah sort of. I like you. I don't met people just because I want to manipulate them. Sometimes I speak to people and hope for something inside of them that makes us similar."
     I don't think we are similar. Every part of me has only been telling me our differences. I never cared to look for his similarities. I mean out similarities. I will apologize later.

We reach Stanford at three thirty. I go inside a supermarket. Neither Ash nor Stacey had bought water. Or anything we can eat and drink for the ride. One should not be able to go to the store with twenty dollars and come out empty handed. I pick up a case of water. Josh pushes the cart. It felt like we was going food shopping. I had no food what food to get. We'd stay in a hotel for three or fours days.
"Someone is watching you,"Josh says. I turn around and look for them. He slaps his face.
"I don't see them."
"Make it less obvious" he mutters. Josh turns my head slightly to the left.
     I still don't notice them; not right away. She was holding a pineapple and staring at me like I was a celebrity. I blushed and looked at some chocolate cookies. I can still feel her eyes and they was outstandingly familiar. Because they was the same color as mine.

Author's note: I hope everyone loved this chapter. I don't have an expected schedule for me to upload a new part but I probably won't be able to post next week because I have a lot of school work to catch up on.