It's Complicated

Chapter 36: You Promised Me Forever (KIM POV)

4 AM rolls around & I instantly wake up. It's my last day in Maryland, after today I won't be waking up in this bed or even going to this job here. Instead, I'll be waking up in Utah, finally finding some actual peace of mind. It's a bittersweet day really, I'm glad to be going home but I'm sad because I don't want to leave my girls.. Well really, I don't want to leave Annie.

We'd gotten so close in such a short amount of time. I kind of thank God that she entered mine & dans life because without her I wouldn't be able to talk about Arabella the way I do now. There's so much she's taught me, so much I've learn from just having her around & I'm not ready to let it go. I wish I could take her with me, man that'd make things easier for me. I know Billy & Katie would let her in a heartbeat, but I can't do that to them. They need Annie & Annie needs them, it's what's best for everyone right now.

I shut my eyes & open them, I partially expect it to be 8 AM & time for me to head out the door but it's only 4:30 AM. I lay in bed going over so many things that my brain feels like it's going to implode. I roll over & cuddle up to Dan, who then pulls me closer. As I lay my head on his chest, I can't help but shed a few tears, as much as I hated the drama going on, I know I'll miss Mary. It kills me knowing I'll be leaving on bad terms with her, but she hurt me far worse than I ever expected.

Before I realize it, it's time for practice. Dan drops me off being that he's off today since we're leaving. As he drops me off at the gym my emotions quickly overwhelm me. I stand outside the doors & exhale deeply when Katie & Annie walk in & greet me with "good morning". This is it. My final day at 1st class until the month is over. I walk in & my heart feels instantly heavy, I don't know how long I can keep this secret from everyone.

Practice drags & it doesn't help that Mary keeps coming up to me asking what's wrong. I know we should make up, I get that. But it's too soon, I'm so hurt by Mare, I just don't know if it's worth trying to salvage this broken friendship. I keep trying to push her away, but she keeps coming back. I just need to make it through lunch, then I can drop my news & be done with all the tension I'm dealing with. Maybe then Mary will leave me alone for a bit.

About a half hour later, Mary comes back to me, this time it felt more aggressive but I didn't want to deal with her. I needed time to deal with this on my own.

"Leave me alone Mary, my gosh! How many times do I have to ignore you before you get the fucking memo? I don't want you near me!"

"Why won't you just talk to me? You're being rude for no reason Kim!"

"If you truly believe that, you're deranged!"

"What did I do to deserve this Kimberly? Do you even have a valid reason for this?"

"Do I have a reason for this? Yes, yes, I do. Do you not remember the party last night? You literally treated me like shit Mary! I can't do this anymore! I'm done with you! I'm done with this!"

"But, I don't remember last night!"

"Sounds like that's a personal problem Mare. I'm over this! This is goodbye! You won't see me anymore!"

I storm out of the gym & leave Mary in tears, I didn't mean for things to get out of hand, but she seriously couldn't take a hint. I JUST WANTED TO BE ALONE!

11:00, it's finally time for school & lunch. Typically this is mine & Mary's lunch break, but today's different. I know I'll be stuck in the gym dealing with crying girls, but I need to put my own happiness first for once & leaving back to Utah will do that for me, or so I hope. It isn't easy watching all the girls file into the school room knowing it'll be the last time I'm here for a while. "Girls sit down, I have some big news to give." I nervously fidget with my hair & avoid making eye contact with any of my girls, especially Annie.