The Rockstar Within Me

The Rock Star Within Me - Chapter 10

Copyright 2011

Totally shocked she would say that. 

"So where exactly do you stand with River?" Jess sat across from me, her features critical. 

"What do you mean?" I looked up from my book, curious about what she was thinking when we were supposed to be doing school work. 

She ignored her half written essay and shut her laptop. "Like are you actually together or are you still pretending to be together?" She clarified, her eyes watching my every reaction. 

I closed my book, Pride and Prejudice would just have to wait until later, my best friend needed answers and there was no running away from her. 

"I hardly think just because I kissed him while I was drunk means "we're seeing each other". I replied skeptically, rolling my eyes. 

"Well you guys are closer now-"

I sighed, cutting her off. "Sure, we've kind of banded together, but it's more cause we're always forced together that we're both like 'screw it'. We don't have a choice in this, no matter what happens... so might as well try and be civil towards each other..." I tried to explain to her. 

She wasn't buying it. 

"I saw you today. He kissed you and you pretty much jumped on him!"

I shrieked, totally shocked she would say that. . "I did not!"

Jess leaned over, covering my mouth. "Christ! No need to get defensive!" She giggled, poking her head outside the room andlooking left and right to see if someone had caught us. 

We had decided that we needed to get away. Impossible, since we're on tour with about 20 other people, but we were able to come up with something. Behind the stage we found a small hidden door that led to an old sound room that hadn't been used in a while. We figured it would be a great place to get caught up on the high school courses we were taking online. 

This was our little hang out and we didn't want some boys like Mason or Drew coming to ruin it. I didn't say River, because I knew he wouldn't care either way, but the others would want to hang out and maybe do their work too and basically our cozy little spot would be gone. 

"All I'm saying is that you guys look cute together." 

I grunted. "Ya right. Me and that jerk? As if!" I scoffed. 

Jess gave me a sarcastic look. 

"Tell me honestly, how has he been a jerk? I'm thinking you're just overreacting..." 

I opened my mouth to protest, but full words and sentences wouldn't come out.

"I..you...River...unbelievable..." I stuttered, anger visible in my appearance and voice. 

She laughed without humor. "See? He hasn't done anything! Sure he's messed up a tad and hasn't been overly nice, but still. River doesn't deserve this crazy psychotic lady you're giving him."

"I can't believe you Jess! How can you even say that!" I vented at her, rising from my seat on an old couch. 

She tugged my hand to pull me back down, but I pulled away, hurt that she would say that I was overreacting!

"Al, you're doing it right now! Calm down! I'm not fighting with you!"

If anybody has ever been told to 'calm down' before, they probably know that you do the exact opposite. It was almost immediate for me.

"Screw you Jess. You just date him then, cause I want nothing to do with you and him!" I shouted at her and walked out of the room. I made sure to slam the door shut after I heard her sigh and mutter something about the irony of the situation. 

How dare she tell me I'm being judgmental of River! He's a sick twisted, spoiled brat, who gets anything he wants. He expects everyone to bow down to him just because he can sing a few lines. And to prove it, he was able to brainwash my friend into thinking he was a nice guy! Ugh. He was far from it.

I was huffing and puffing as I crossed the stage when I heard something. 

Huge curtains separated me from it, and I stopped walking to listen closer.

"Thanks so much River, I'm you biggest fan!" I heard a voice say. 

"Why thank you darling. You're too kind." River replied. 

I got down on all fours and slowly lifted up the curtain to get a peak at what was going on. 

River stood with his back towards me, and a girl with her parents stood to his right. 

From the minute I saw her I could tell something was wrong. She was small and had a bald head. Her eyes had large dark circles around them and her whole face looked sickly yellow. The poor girl look like she was fighting a battle of cancer and it broke my heart. The parents of the girl watch from a few feet away smiling at their daughter's happiness, watching as River posed for multiple pictures. 

Soon the parents started to wrap things up and I saw Jeff stand off to the left, his face expressionless. 

"Love you River!" The girl exclaimed, her cheeks going red. 

"Love you too honey." He replied, giving her a big hug before turing away and walking towards side stage. I jumped up quickly hiding myself in the dark curtains, becoming a shadow myself. 

I listened until I knew the coast was clear and was able to pick up a few words from Jeff and River's conversation. 

"Good job kid." Jeff muttered. 

"I love doing stuff like that. Makes me feel like I'm actually making a difference, you know?" River replied quietly. 

"Ya well, I think your doing a good thing meeting all those wish kids or whatever that lady called them."

"It's for the make a wish foundation. If a kid's dying wish is just to meet me, I think I owe it to them-" 

The last part was muffled as they walked farther away. 

I looked down at my hands, feeling awfully bad about overreacting about River. I guess there was a possibility that he wasn't so bad. Actually he might be a little good.