Homecoming Pt. 1

Enzo 79

I drove around the city lost in my thoughts, every time someone would call my phone I would send them to voicemail.  Khalil.... voicemail, Devin..... voicemail, Legacy...... voicemail, my mom.... voicemail, Legacy again...... voicemail. I had too many thoughts swirling around my head to talk to anyone right now especially him, hell he was the main thing I thought about, the only thing I thought about. Why was I getting close to this little dude? I knew how I was, I knew I'd probably fuck his life up if I let him get too close to me. I should probably just cease all contact with him even though I was really feeling him, I knew there could never be anything real between us, I wasn't the relationship type all my past relationships lasted only six months, I always ended them at six months. Don't ask me why six months because even I don't know, no matter how the relationship was going I always ended them. Good or bad, I still ended them and I didn't want to hurt Legacy like that. After driving around all night I finally decided to go back to my mom's house, I pulled up around nine in the morning to see my mom, Marcus, his mom and Tonya all sitting on the porch, that really threw me off but I was too tired to cared. I walked up the stairs about to go inside when I was stopped.

"Lorenzo sit down." My mom said looking at me, I started to argue but then I remember there was no point she probably would've followed me all the way back to my room. I sat down and yawn letting her know I was tired. "I don't care about you being tired you should've thought about that before you were out ignoring my calls last night." She said rolling her neck.

'How do ya'll know each other." I said pointing at her and Marcus's mom.

"We go to the same bingo hall, now quit interrupting me. Khalil called and told me what happened last night and...."

"Dafuq he do that for?" I said pissed, she raised her eyebrows and I immediately backtracked. "I'm sorry, that was disrespectful." I said quietly.

"He called here looking for you since you didn't want to answer your phone and he gave me a brief rundown of what happened besides I've known Khalil since he wore Power Ranger underwear and he knew if anyone could talk some sense into you it was me. Now I don't know why you're always walking around with that damn wall around your heart but I'm about to help you tear it down." She said and I felt like walking away because this isn't a conversation I wanted to have with my mom.

"I don't have a wall around my heart." I mumbled.

"Lorenzo you must've forgot who you were talking too. I know you better then you know your damn self, hell I knew you were bisexual before you did. Now what is your problem? You've never been in a solid relationship that I know of and I'm starting to think you want to be alone for the rest of your life." She said and I tired really hard not to roll my eyes. "Go ahead roll your eyes and I'll knock them out your damn head. Now answer the damn question." She said staring a hole through me.

"I don't know.... I just...... I don't know. It's like I'm scared to get hurt and every time I feel myself getting close to someone I pull away before I can get hurt. I start looking for ways out, and with the person I'm talking to now it's different I'm not worrying about me getting hurt I'm worried about him." I said.

"But where is this fear from getting hurt coming from Lorenzo?" My mother asked. I sat back and thought about it even though I knew where the starting point was.

"Because of him....." I said pointing at Marcus. "Back when we were in high school and you and Khalil got together, I felt betrayed I found it hard to trust people after that I didn't want to feel that every again and even though I've forgave Khalil a long time ago and realized the most me and you could ever be is friends, those scars on my heart never faded." I said truthfully.

"Lorenzo...... how many chances have you had to approach me?" Marcus asked, but I knew it was a rhetorical question so I didn't answer. "If you had approached me first things may have been different but you didn't.... you never did, and now ten plus years later the only person you've hurt is yourself. You need to get your shyt together and not only give Legacy a chance but yourself as well." Marcus said.

"He's just so damn young and....." I started to say but Tonya interrupted me.

"And you're worried that people will judge you?" Marcus said.

"You act like he's in middle school or something, that boy is all the way legal. That boy is on his way to college and from what I hear he's really mature for his age, and most importantly he's sexy as fuck, if I wasn't engaged and in love I'd be all over him." Tonya said and Marcus rolled his eyes. I sat there thinking about everything they said and some of it started to sink in, but I was tired and ready for bed.

"Look I'm too tired to have this conversation with ya'll so I'm going to sleep and I'll see ya'll later." I said getting up, I entertained them long enough and I hated the fact that they were all in my business. "Nosy asses." I mumbled as I walked inside the house.

I hated having dreams where I knew I was dreaming and couldn't wake myself up, I was sitting at a long table tied to a chair and on both sides of the table were all the men and women I've dated through the years. I couldn't look any of them in the eyes. They were all mumbling the same word..... coward. I tried to get up but couldn't move, like I said I knew I was dreaming but for the life of me I couldn't wake myself up. They all stood up and started walking towards me, there words getting louder and louder, coward..... Coward..... COWARD! My heart started racing in my chest, they were closing around me I felt myself suffocating.

"LORENZO WAKE UP!" Somebody said shaking me from my sleep, I opened my eyes and couldn't see who had woken me up but as my eyes came in focus I noticed Legacy sitting on my bed with the sun shining behind him like some kind of chocolate angel.

"What the fuck?" I asked groggily. Legacy smirked slightly and shook his head.

"Your mom asked me to come check on you, she heard you up here yelling and got worried..... we all did. Here you got a little something on your mouth." He said handing me a paper towel. I wiped the slobber from my mouth and stared at him.

"Damn..... I didn't realize I was yelling in my sleep. I didn't say anything too crazy did I?" I asked sitting up.

"Nah man just something about being a coward you must have been having one helluva dream." Legacy said laughing.

"Yeah you could say that, who's all downstairs?" I asked stretching.

"Damn near everybody, we're just waiting on Marcus and Tonya to get back with Marcus's brother Khalil wants to go out to eat with everyone." Legacy said.

"Why do we always have to do what Khalil wants? How about this me and you say fuck lunch and we go do our own thing?" I asked standing up completely forgetting that I was only in my boxers. Legacy looked at me wide eyed and started to blush.

"We could do that..... only if you agree not to freak out when I try to kiss you again." Legacy said, I smiled and pulled him to his feet and kissed him, we stood like that for what seemed like eternity when we finally pulled apart he smiled at me and I smiled back. "Damn what was that for?" He asked.

"Truthfully I'm not sure..... but I feel like I'm letting my own demons keep me from being happy, after talking to my mom and Marcus I realized that I worry too much about what other people think. I'm not saying I want to be in a relationship but I do like spending time with you and I want to get to know you better, I guess what I'm saying is I want to be friends first if you can handle that?" I said pulling some basketball shorts on.

"Hell yeah I can handle that, let me go tell them that we're doing our own thing." Legacy said getting up to walk out the room.

"Wait before you go..... are you gonna kiss me or not?" I said smiling, Legacy smiled back and gave me a kiss. "One day at a time aight?"

"Aight." Legacy said kissing me again just as the door flew opened and Khalil walked in.

"Oh shyt my bad." He said looking away, Legacy started to back up but I grabbed his hand and pulled him closer to me.

"Ayy bro I'm going to have to skip on lunch." I said looking at him. Khalil shook his head and smirked as he walked out the room. "So yesterday we got to do what I wanted so today is all about you what do you wanna do?" I asked, Legacy looked at the bed and smiled. "Nah little dude you ain't ready for all that yet." I said laughing and for the first time in a while I started to feel complete.