For Me, For You, For Us(Completed)

Dirt

DAN's POV
"Daniel Howell, please see me after class," says my Advanced Literature teacher as he walks away. I groan pulling my head up off my desk, my poorly straightened hair falling over my eyes.
Fuck this is one of the worse hangovers I have ever gotten.
I groan when the bell rings, making me feel like my head is going to explode as I grab my things to walk up to the teacher.
As I start to walk up the isle I hear laughing and look around the classroom to identify the sound. It's that one guy, Travis or Troy or something and he's laughing at something Phil said. My heart clenches as Phil walks over to Troy or whatever and throws his arm around him as they leave the classroom.
I don't even realize that I'm frozen halfway between my desk and the professor until he clears his throat.
I force my limbs to unfreeze and move me forward. Feeling sick for a reason completely unrelated to my hangover.

I walk up the the Professors desk, waiting to hear what he has to say.
Professor Kelling, or at least that's what his name tag thing on his desk says, clears his throat for the fucking zillionth time and asks me to take a seat.
"Okay Daniel, I'm just going to get right to it", he says in a straightforward voice," these past couple of months your work ethic has gone from exceptional to dangerous. Your almost at a point where you won't be able to make this up anymore and you will have to retake the class this summer, now I don't want to have to get your father involved-,"my hear stops",-for many reasons, unless you manage to change your work ethic and quickly than all of this can be avoided", he says in a calm voice, unaware of my inner turmoil, "I know it's been a rough couple years for you Dan, which is why I'm talking to you now when normally I would have stayed out of it, I want to give you your best chance," he says in a much softer tone, I look up, curious at the change in tone, only to shrink back when I see kindness in his eyes, kindness and knowledge.
'Fuck he knows', I think. 'How the fuck does he know!' I jump up from my seat and the chair flies to the ground.
'I can't breath, I can't breath', my mind screams as I bring my hand up to my chest, clenching my shirt.
"Daniel?", Mr. Kelling says in a worried tone, "Are you okay?".
I can't answer, I can't breath.
I grab my stuff off the floor and flee the room. Caught between the feeling of fainting and the feeling of throwing up.
Somehow I stumble into my room, struggling out of my constricting clothes that feel like they are choking me, suffocating me, touching me.
The sight of my body disgusts me, covered in bruises and cuts, so dirty, so broken, hideous.
I start rubbing at my arms, trying to rub away the dirt, It won't come off, It's never coming off, It's inside me and It won't get out.
"Filthy useless faggot," my dads voice rings in my head.
I stumble my way to the bathroom, sit in the tub and turn the water onto full blast, not caring as it starts to burn my skin with the heat, maybe I can burn away the dirt, I grab a washcloth from the counter and start scrubbing my body, trying to clean it, trying to get rid of the dirt, I don't even notice when the cuts on my arms and legs reopen and start bleeding again. Turning the water a pale pink.
I keep scrubbing at my body, till the previously unbroken skin is red and raw and bleeding.
The dirt won't get off me, it's inside me, I need to get ride of the dirt. I keep scrubbing, tears running down my face until the pain becomes to much and by body just stops, everything goes black and I drift into unconsciousness.