For Me, For You, For Us(Completed)

Crush

PHIL's POV
A pair of hands cover my eyes as I'm walking down the hall towards my computer engineering class, I stop, breaking out into a smile as a voice leans up and whispers in my ear ,"Guess who?". I laugh and reach behind me to grab onto the wrists covering my eyes as I turn myself to face Troye. I release one of his hands, still holding the other, as I reach up with my free hand to lightly caress his face ,"Hhmmm I wonder who it could be...", I say as I dip my head down to his lips, claiming them in a sweet kiss, "I'm gonna have to go with... Troye after some careful consideration", I whisper in his ear. "Hey that's cheating!", he says, sounding out of breath. I laugh breaking free from his spell as we turn to walk down the hall, holding hands.

My phone buzzes in my pocket, alerting me to a text. I pull my phone out and read it as we walk down the hall. I suddenly stop, my brain faltering as I struggle to understand what has been sent to me.
"What's wrong?", Troye asks with a worried look on his face. "Nothing, my mom just texted me to tell me that this guy I used to go to school with might be transferring here after the semester and I just...", I cut myself off, still trying to absorb the information.
"But what's wrong?", he says again, staring into my eyes as he reaches on hand up to cup my cheek. "Nothing really...umm... It's a long story", I say, my voice breaking towards the end. "We have a little while", Troye says, leading me over to a bench.
"I don't know why I even said it was a long story cause it isn't really, it's painfully short", I say with a harsh laugh. "It's simple really, it was high school and I thought I was in love..."
It was my senior year of high school, I had a feeling I was into guys yet I hadn't come out of the closet and I wasn't planning too, I wasn't ready to face the judgment from other people as well as the judgement from myself. I was walking down the halls of my old high school digging through my bag, not really watching where I'm going(like normal) when I suddenly bumped into a warm body, all my books and all of theirs went flying all over the floor. "What the fuck!", says an annoyed voice. I look up and my heart stops when I see that I have run into Logan Paul and his gang, the most popular guys at my school. "I... umm... I'm sorry.. I just...", I stammer, backing away from them as quickly as I can. "Get the fuck out of here you loser", one of the guys says with a laugh. "Hey man lay off, lets just get out of here", says a guy towards the back with a tone of authority in his voice, even though he is part of Logan's clique. I lift my eyes off the ground to see the voice that somewhat spoke in my defense. It's a tall guy with an interesting accent, tan skin, and blonde hair. "Fine, whatever Caspar", Logan says as he leads his gang away from me. Caspar looks back giving me a crooked smile as he trails behind his friends.

"Did you have another run in with Logan's gang after that", Troye asks with a confused expression. "Kinda, but it's a lot more complicated than that", I say sadly.

The rest of the week goes by without issue and I start to forget about the whole incident at all, figuring I had made it out to be bigger than it actually was. I was walking home from school the second week when I felt a hand on my shoulder, I freaked out a little, not expecting anyone to touch me but when I turned around it was Caspar. Initially I thought he came to beat me up, to finish business or something, but all he wanted was to talk. Like we were old friends. It was so weird, yet our personalities just clicked and we could talk about anything. The walk home flew by and by the time we arrived at my house I felt like I had known him for years. He asked for my phone number and I held my phone out to him so he could put his contact info in.
After that day we texted everyday, we would sometimes meet up at my house and play video games, never his house, he would find the little excuses to touch me and it would make my heart pound like crazy, yet he didn't seem affected at all so I tried to act like I wasn't either. We would never hang out at school, he said it was something about protecting me from his asshole friends but honestly I think it was more about trying to save his reputation. Whatever, back then I didn't care, I had a new friend and that meant the world to me. We kept up this secret friendship for weeks. We would walk home together and text throughout the day.
It was the night of prom when things started to go downhill, I went to the dance with my friends while Caspar went with the most popular beautiful girl at our school, Eva Gutowski. My friends weren't really into the scene so we just sat at our table and watched everyone around us dance and have fun. Eva and Caspar were inseparable, they danced so close it should have been illegal. I sat there fuming, thinking I was jealous because I didn't have anyone to dance with the way they were dancing together, but then I realized that I wasn't jealous because of that, I was jealous because I wanted it to be me that was grinding with Caspar.
The realization shocked me and I left the dance immediately, scared and frustrated with my thoughts.
I ignored Caspar that whole weekend and all of Monday before the infamous walk home. He confronted me about it, asking me why I was ignoring him, I told him to leave me alone but he just kept pushing me the whole way home. I didn't talk to him the whole way home and when we got to my house I slammed the front door in his face. I knew I was being childish and it wasn't Caspar's fault that I had a crush on him but I couldn't help it.
After that he got the message and avoided me completely, I couldn't decide if I was happy about that or angry, maybe a little bit of both.
Eventually I guess he had enough or something because he confronted me a couple days later at school, which was totally out of character for him. He pulled me behind a building and said, "Okay I've been trying to give you your space but I just don't get it, I didn't do anything wrong so why are you avoiding me?"  I refused to answer, trying to push my way past him and get back into the hall. "Okay this is such bullshit", he said as he grabbed me and turned me to face him, tilting my chin up with his hand, "What did I do?", he asked with a confused expression on his face. But I couldn't breath, I was staring directly into his eyes and his face was so close to mine and before I could even think about it I had closed the distance between us and was kissing his lips. He was shocked and didn't move for a couple moments and my heart started to pound even faster, thinking I had made the worst mistake ever, when suddenly, he kissed me back, not majorly, just the slightest movement of his lips but it went all the way to my soul. I started kissing him in almost a frenzy then, both of us just so caught up in the moment that we didn't process anything happening around us until it was too late. "Casp, Yo Caspar, where you at?", called a voice around the corner. We both heard it at the same time and tried to break away before we were caught but we weren't quick enough. "What the FUCK?!", yelled Logan Paul as he stepped behind the building with his gang of friends, looking angry and confused. At first I was worried for Caspar, afraid that they were going to hurt him, my worry vanished a second later when Caspar pushed me away from him and said, "What the fuck are you doing faggot, get the fuck off me you little bitch". I stumbled backward, unable to keep my balance and fell hard onto the ground, scraping my palms when I hit. Caspar winched and his look turned to guilt for a second before Logan came up to us. "You fucking faggots", he spit, "Thinking you can just go around spreading your disgusting perversion", he growled at me, "Your disgusting", he said as he got up to go away with Caspar. "Fucking coward", I whispered under my breath, hoping Caspar would hear, he did and he paled, unfortunately he wasn't the only one who heard. "What the fuck did you just say to me fag?", Logan said as he turned around. I ignored him as I tried to pick myself off the ground. "Fucking say something when I'm talking to you you abomination", he growled as he came over to me and kicked me in my side, and pain spread through my ribs. I curled into a ball, trying to protect myself. Fuck you", I seethed at him, past the point of caring. "You do not talk to me like that fucking faggot!", he yelled before kicking me in my side again, the breath whooshed out of my lungs but before I could recover, he kicked me again, yelling curses and insults as he got his gang to join in, some of the guys stepped forward, hoisting me off the ground and upright while Logan went in front of me, he punched me in the stomach and I doubled over from the pain. I saw Caspar behind him, looking like he himself was in pain. He then grabbed my hair and yanked my head up. "You are going to hell", he said staring into my eyes, his blazing with fury. "Well then I'll see you there", I growled at him, maintaining eye contact. He roared and punched me in the face as his friends threw me at the wall, my back and head slamming into it as I saw stars and crumbled to the ground. That's when they started kicking me and stomping on me.
I was in a state of half consciousness when a teacher finally realized what was happening and called out, trying to stop Logan and his gang, Logan and his gang saw the teacher and ran away before he could bust them. I'm not sure where Caspar went, if he was with them or if he left before, I don't know.

I had to go to the hospital and get stitches along my ribs, none of them were broken, just badly bruised. My right hand was broken, which meant that I couldn't draw properly for two months. I was covered in cuts and bruises and in a lot of pain but overall I didn't have any major injuries and I was free to go home after the first night. My parents were devastated, at first I didn't tell them what really happened, only that some guys from school had beat me up, but eventually they got it out of me and I told them the whole story, starting from the beginning. I was sobbing by the end of it and my mom, dad, and brother came over to hold me in a giant group hug. I have never felt so supported in my life.
My parents refused to send me back to that school so I finished my senior year at a school not to far away and tried my best to put the issue behind me.
Sometimes I still get nightmares in the middle of the night and wake up shaking. I hate feeling like the victim and I promised myself I would never feel that way again.

"I'm so sorry", said Troye, with tears in his eyes, "I couldn't even imagine". I sighed. "It was over a year ago and I'm over it, I'm just happy to have someone like you in my life who can make me forget about the bad stuff", I said, resting the side of my head against the top of his as he cuddled into my shoulder. We didn't say anything after that. Just sat and enjoyed each other's company for as long as we could.

I got to engineering a couple minutes late and tried not to draw to much attention to myself as I slid into my seat. After a couple minutes I looked to my right, expecting to see Peej lounging back in his seat, his eyes dancing wildly across the room but when I turned to my right Peej wasn't there.