I Want You Here - (Steggy and Romanogers!)❤️❤️

What Could Have Been

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Peggy's POV.

I was siting in Steve's living room waiting for him to finish ordering our pizza when I saw a black book sitting on the end-table. I picked it up and opened it. It was a journal.

There was drawings and writings about the war . One drawing was very familiar. It was of a monkey on unicycle with a shield. I chucked softly remembering back.

I flipped through the book then I came to a page that was odd. It wrote about Steve waking up, but he said he was all alone and that he missed me. I flipped to the next page and read. He talked about how he saw me at a home for older people and how I had dementia. "What?" I said under my breath.

I then turned a few more pages. He talked about SHIELD falling and how he and Natasha were being hunted by the winter soldier. "Natasha? That was me not her." I whispered. Then it talked of how she was very special to him and how he thought he might love her. He talked of how they kissed and then how she told him she wasn't good enough for him. And how he was hurt. My eyes were filled with tears. I was so confused. He talked of how he was jealous of Bruce and that he still had feelings for her.

Then I came to a page that said one sentence that frightened me most and made realize what this was. 'She's gone. Forever. Goodbye Peggy.' I looked up realizing. "I died? Wait this was what would of happened?" I thought. 'This is what he went threw if I wouldn't have come with him on the plane.' I thought. I sighed with relief.

I turned the page again. He talked of how he was going to travel back in time. He talked of how Bruce had come back and he and Nat were together again. He said how he was jealous he was of him. That he really wanted to be with her. He also talked about the last thing she had said to him before he travel back.

'I looked over to see Natasha with her sideways smile. We both greeted each other. She smiled then she got serious. "I want you know I'll never stop believing in you and I um..." She shook her head. "Good luck." I was confused by the way she was acting. She was almost acting...afraid. Then I told her I was coming back.  Because it seemed as if she thought she was going to loose me. I don't know why she would care though having Bruce back now. "I know. It's just... Don't do anything you'll regret Steve. She told me, then she stumbled over her words. She said. "I need you- we need you...here. We always have." She said. I was confused and still am. I thanked her and hugged her. Was she saying she needed me? Before letting go she leaned up and kissed my cheek softly. It made my whole body shiver. I pulled back and looked into her eyes. 'I finally realized that she was afraid of loosing me, but again why? She didn't love me. I smiled at her sweetly. Then walked away. I wonder what she's doing right now while I'm here in my past?' He wrote. I sighed. "He loved her." I spoke aloud sitting down.

"What?" I heard from behind me. I quickly jumped up and turned towards him hiding the book behind me. "Steve!" I exclaimed. He looked oddly at me. "What's up?" He asked. "Oh! N-nothing just ummm...looking around." I said. I didn't want him to know I read his journal. I was hurt deeply that he wanted to be with her, but I had to hide it. "Okay?" He sat down. I sat down also placing the book down while he wasn't looking. "So the pizzas on its way." He said.

"Good. Steve?" I asked. "Yeah?" He said. "Was there a girl?" I asked. "What?" "Umm... What I mean is when you had been the only one frozen in ice and I was old... Was there another girl you were inlove with?" I asked timidly. "Of course not." He said shaking his head. "Why?" He asked. "Well...you never moved on?" I asked. "I never really moved on Peggy. I always loved you. I did care for people, but I never fell inlove again." He answered. I nodded. "Who did you care for?" I asked.

He got up. "Aww, Peg. Why are worrying about this?" He said shaking his head. I stayed sitting down. "Because... I just am." I answered me eyes flicking over to the journal. He followed my eyes. He looked at the journal then back at me. His mouth dropped. "What did you read?" He asked. "Steve! I would never read your journal!" "Peg. What did you read about?" He asked raising his voice slightly. I sighed.
"Natasha."

He nodded. "Peggy, Natasha was special to me, yes, but I wasn't inlove with her." He said. "Did you ever have the chance to be though?" I asked. He through up his arms shaking his head in disbelief. "Peggy! I love you not her!" He said.

Tears started falling down my cheeks. "I know that, but did you ever have the chance to be in love with her?" I asked. "I don't want to be Peg. I have you." He sat down and held my hands. I nodded knowingly.

"I know, but of what I read, she loved you and you loved her. If I wouldn't have changed everything by coming on that plane with you...you would have been with who you were actually meant to be with. Natasha." I said crying.

"Peggy! She was with Bruce and she didn't love me. I'm glad you changed history now I have you." I stood up shaking my head. "She did love you. The way you said she acted and her last words to you before you left to travel back....she didn't want you to leave Steve because... she didn't want you to change time. She didn't want you to decide to not crash the plane." I said. He shook is head in confusion.

"She was inlove with you! She thought you might because of me change history making it where you and her would never meet!" I yelled. I then sat back down. "No way." He said. "Yes way! She said 'I need you' right?" He nodded. "She said that because she actually did. And now Bruce is gone and you're with me. She's alone and your destiny didn't play out." I said realizing I had messed up his true life. I started sobbing. 'I was never meant to be with him.' I thought. 'She was.'

"Peggy." He spoke softly and sat down beside me comforting me. "I don't care. Your my destiny. I love you." He hugged me. Then I hugged back. "Did you love her?" I asked. He pulled away and looked me in the eyes. "And don't you lie to me." I ordered. He took a deep breath. "I don't know ." He answered. I shut my eyes. "But I know wasn't inlove with her yet. Not like I am and have been inlove with you." He said pulling me to him.

"No Steve." I said pulling away. "I can't. We...can't. Not right now." I said getting up and getting my jacket. "What why?" "Because... I need to think. I know you love me, but I don't know how I can live with knowing I messed up your true life." I explained. "But Peggy you didn't you made it perfect." He yelled. "I can't Steve." I said and walked out.