Shawn Mendes Imagines

Breakdowns

Shawns POV

I wish I could be normal.

Even if "normal is not a thing".

It really is.

The people who have enough money and play sports. The people who have tons of friends or are really smart. The people with the fine family. All of these things. Are the normal things.

Instead I am the one who tries to hide. The one who the second they leave the house, they already regret it. The one who doesn't smile and laugh. Instead of the diamond in the ruff. Everyone is the diamond. And I am the ruff. 

I sat in my room, my hands on my head. Tears soaked my face. 

What am I doing?

I was panicking. 

I needed to stop. 

But I couldn't. My breaths were short. And none of them were more than just gasps for air. 

I grabbed my phone. 

"Hello?" I heard her light voice ask. "What's up babe?"

Your POV

"Y/N. I am s-so sorry," He choked. 

I sat up from my laying position on my bed.

"Wait. Shawn is there something wrong?" I asked. Nerves climbed up my spine. I started to feel anxious. I knew something was wrong. I also knew I needed to move. He was not okay at all. I grabbed my coat quietly, trying not to freak him out more. 

"Y/N I didn't mean to."

"Shawn mean what? Here love I will be over in a few minutes okay. Stay on the phone with me the whole time okay? I love you. Breathe slowly  Shaw-"

"No no, I am okay."

"I love you, Shawn. But that is a complete lie. I will be there in just a couple minutes okay and we can talk about whatever is wrong o-"

He hung up the phone. 

"No. Oh my gosh." I dropped my phone and sprinted to the door. My mom jumped up. 

"Sweetie where are you going?"

"It's Shawn. I have to go!" I hurried, grabbing my shoes.

"What is wrong?"

"I don't know he is in trouble!" I yelled. My eyes started welling as I got really scared. 

"Slow down honey. Let's talk," My mom insisted. 

"I am sorry, I have to go!" I ran out the door and to my car. I tried to open my door, my whole body shuddering. 

I shouldn't be freaking out. But I am anyways. 

Because I love him.

Because the person I was dating was always happy. Never sad. And when he was sad it was never extreme. And if even ever was I would be the first person he would tell. 

And that is what happened. 

There is this thing. 

Basically, I have heard many times that breakdowns are not just crying. That they happen when someone has been staying strong for long. 

I love him. 

And I was terrified about anything happening to him. 

I know he is home alone both of his parents work. 

I was driving well over the speed limit. 

But there no limit for the person I needed to get to.