Shawn Mendes Imagines

Because I Had You.

I was sitting on the balcony, the midnight sky surrounding me. The void was filled with stars and the sound of cars racing down the street rang through my ears. I was holding onto my phone, staring at the contact photo blankly. 

"Shawn?" A voice called from the sliding door behind me. I turned my head to see Lindsey behind me, leaning on the door frame, a small smile on her face. 

"Yeah babe?"

"Are we going to get started soon?" She smirked and lifted the wine bottle that I hadn't noticed was in her hand. I stared for a second, then shook my head out of my daze. 

"Yeah, yeah of course. I just have to call my- mom, then I'll be in," I smiled as a goodbye and she closed the door. I looked back at my phone and ringed the number. Listening to the tone vibrate my phone over and over, my hope of her answering lessened. Until I heard her voice say "This is my voicemail box, don't fill it up too much, bye!" Then I heard an automated voice tell me to leave a message after the beep. The beep came too fast for me to comprehend. And I had to gather myself. I took a long exhale and gulped.

"I think it's time that I be honest," I said in quiet tone. I glanced back inside, seeing Brandy cuddled up on the couch watching a show on the television. 

"Should've told you not to go. Thought I knew just what I wanted." Brandy was laughing, covering her mouth with her hand, even though no one else was in the room to get self conscious around.

"I didn't know myself at all. You're with somebody I can't be, yeah. But I can tell that you're happy," I was looking on my laptop at the new picture she took, with him on her side instead of me.

"It's time for me to finally meet somebody new." I gave a sad smile back at Lindsey, then looked at my laptop again. The picture was at our favorite restaurant.

"Take her to all the places that I took us to." This time when I glanced at Brandy, she caught it, giving me a thumbs up with a giddy smile. I returned the thumbs up, and lost the smile when her attention got stolen from the T.V.  "but loving her is something I could never do. Because I had-" gulp "Because I had you"

The voicemail was cut off. I quickly re-dialed her. And got sent to voicemail again. 

"Hey, remember when I told you that you and I, we'd go down in history together, yeah?" 

She didn't respond, obviously. I waited a second before I started to fall apart into a mess of questions.

"And does your sister ask about me? You and I, what we had, is it gone forever?" I was rambling, getting worked up. Tears were starting to brim. 

"You're with somebody I can't be," I said, staring at the guy in the photo. She was smiling big as she tried to hold in the laughter. 

"But I can tell that you're happ-" 

The door opened, and I quickly clicked out of the browser on my laptop and hit end call. I stood to face Lindsey, an excited expression on her face. 

"Ready?" 

"Ready."

It's time for me to finally meet somebody new

I kissed her on the cheek and walked into my apartment. 

"First, I was thinking we could run to that liquor store and grab some wine. Okay?" I suggested, which of course Lindsey quickly agreed to and we were walking down the sidewalk to see Roberto and the store. And of course he waited to see her walk through the door with me.

Take her to all the places that I took us to

She didn't, but Lindsey still made Roberto smile. When she walked out the store, he held me back. 

"She is lovely, you should've kept Y/N though," he said with a sad smile. 

"It wasn't a matter of us not wanting each other Roberto. Just life not letting us. But yes, she is lovely." I waved him off the rushed through the doors to grab my girlfriend's hand and hurry back to my complex. 

By the time we got back, we were giggling and telling the most ridiculous childhood stories. She closed the door gently, then turned to me with a grin. 

"Should we open this up?" 

"We should."

4 cups later, we were tangled on my bed, staring at the ceiling. 

"I love you," she whispered.

And she might help me forget, but loving her is something I could never do

"You do?" I asked. She turned to face me. 

"You do? That's your response," she muttered, frowning. 

Because I had you

"No no no I mean-"

There's nothing left to lose

"I know silly," she kissed me "I know you love me," she laughed and rolled onto her back. 

"Yeah, of course."

Because I had you, babe

"I think you are my person," she admitted, barely awake. 

"My person?" 

"Yeah. Don't you have one?"

There's nothing

"I guess."

Nothing that I could do

"Who is it?"

I wish I had you

I sat in silence for a minute, then glanced at Lindsey. 

"You."

I lied. But.

I think it's time I finally found somebody new

"Awe, you are so cute," she leaned in and pecked my cheek. "Goodnight babe."

And tell myself that she's the one to get me through

"Goodnight love."

Then I got a call. I sneaked out of the bed and walked back to the balcony. 

And she might help me forget that loving her is something I just couldn't do

"Hello?"

"Shawn?"

Because I had you

"Y/N."

A/N 

I am not leaving Wattpad, just needed to take a break for myself for a little bit. But I will try to get as much out for you guys as possible, because we all need some imaginary love with a celebrity sometimes right?