paper cranes | ✔️

xxiii.

wow.

i like you so much that i end up having dreams about you.

technically, about us.

the "us" that'll never happen, obviously.

i can't help but wish it was true,

but dreams are dreams for a reason.

everyone tells me to follow my dreams,

but this is out of reach.

✕

It was the ring of the doorbell that broke Mae out of her trance. She was busy baking a red velvet cake, needing some sugar to spice up her life (even though that's a rather contradictory statement). She ran as quickly as she could to the door, opening it slowly. Mae's breath caught in her throat when she saw who was standing in front of her.

"Hey Mae," he said as he walked into the house and took off his jacket.

"Jasper. Where's Jasmyn? Is she having her study group again?"

"Yeah," he said, taking a minute to assess Mae's current state, "you look kinda cute," he laughed into his fist. Mae looked down, seeing her teal sheep pajamas.

"...thanks." She took his jacket and his parents' jackets to the closet as they walked into the kitchen, politely greeting the rest of Mae's family.

"Jiejie! We're having guests over!" her younger brother yelled and his eyes enlarged when he saw Jasper in the kitchen. 

"...I could tell, Jiao," she replied and she ran up the stairs to get dressed up. Meanwhile, her younger brother took Jasper downstairs to the basement and were aggressively playing Mario Kart, when Mae walked to the basement and beat them both with an extra controller. 

"Aww! Jiejie, again!" her brother said, and she turned to face Jasper, who only gave her a heart-warming, butterfly-inducing smile in response. But Mae ended up beating them again.

"Julien, Mae, Jasper! Please come up for dinner!" Mae's father yelled and they all walked up to the stairs, taking their seats at the dinner table. 

"So, I heard you've accomplished quite a bit," Mae's father said as they passed around the mashed potatoes. 

"Um...I suppose so," Jasper replied, his voice wavering. 

"No need to be nervous!" he said, laughing heartily. As everyone continued to eat and the parents chatted about what they would normally talk about, Jasper reached for Mae's hand and squeezed it tightly. 

"Your hands are really sweaty...what are you so nervous about, Jasper?" she whispered quietly as she held onto his hand. He turned towards her, his eyes displaying a message of not now, I'll tell you later. Mae finished her meal and detached her hand from Jasper's to rinse her plate and she ushered him to her bedroom, while her younger brother stayed in the dining room with the parents. 

"Mae?"

"Yes, Jasper?" she asked as she laid her head on his shoulder and held his hand.

"I-I really like you, Mae. And I'm sure you know that already. But I'm scared that your parents will never accept me, or rather, us," he mumbled. His eyes got glassy and Mae turned his head towards hers.

"They may not accept us, Jasper, but we won't know until we try," she replied softly. He leaned in a bit, their eyes closed, and their lips touched. She didn't peg him as the emotional, crying type, but she knew that he was crying both tears of sadness and exhaustion. His hands reached around her small frame, their foreheads touching each other.

"Dessert's ready!" they heard and ran down the stairs, their cheeks red and flushed. She grabbed a bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream and sat down together with everyone. Dessert was over before she could even say anything—and she knew what that meant: he was leaving. He grabbed his jacket and hugged Mae and Julien before stepping out the door.

"Thank you for having us, Jiaying and Lewis. It was nice meeting you. Good luck to the both of you, Mae and Julien. Good night!" Jasper's mom said and walked out, closing the door behind her.

And then Mae woke up.

✕

so i actually did have this dream. to be honest, i guess it was kind of heartbreaking, only because i like him so much and i'm probably head over heels for him (which he doesn't know).

currently, i guess i just have to try and get closer to him in real life (at least that's the advice that i've received).

i must seem very depressed and disappointed. i'm not depressed thought...i'm just sad, i guess.   

lots of love,

daze