Why Me? (the gaga diaries)

Twenty-Five

Chapter 25-diary entry 9

When I got up this morning, Gaga was in the kitchen making waffles. I got up and went into the bathroom to brush my teeth before breakfast. When I looked in the mirror, I didn't like what I saw. All the weight I'd worked so hard to lose was back. All I could see was fat. I started crying, and I just sat there for a long time, staring at the mirror in agony. After a while, Gaga knocked on the door, and I told her I'd be right out. I finished brushing my teeth, and went out into the kitchen. When Gaga saw me she smiled, and handed me a plate. I got a small waffle, and sat at my usual spot on the couch. She came over and sat next to me, and started eating. I pushed my food around, pretending to eat it, taking a bite here and there. Gaga didn't seem to notice at first, but when she finished, she looked at my plate and raised an eye brow. "What's the matter? Why aren't you eating?" She asked.

I looked away from her and set the plate down. "I'm just not hungry." I whispered. "Bull. What's wrong?" She asked, scooting closer to me. "Nothing." I mumbled, looking at my lap. "Amy, don't shut me out. What's going on? I'm here, I understand." She lifted my face up to level with hers. "I just.. I've gained a lot of weight lately." I murmured, trying to avoid the subject. "How do you know?" She asked. "I can see it.." I answered. She shook her head, "You are not fat. You haven't weighed yourself. You don't know how much you've really gained." She led me into the bedroom, and pulled a small scale out of the closet. "I do not support this, but I just want to make a point. And after this, the scale is getting trashed." I looked down at the scale, terrified. "Step on it." Gaga ordered sternly, yet gently at the same time. I took a deep breath and stepped up on it. "Good god Amy.." Gaga whispered, almost to where I couldn't hear her. I looked down. 97lbs. I closed my eyes and fought back the tears. "I gained 3 pounds." I mumbled, stepping off the scale. "You GAINED three pounds?" Gaga asked, almost on the verge of yelling. I looked at the ground, unsure of what to say. 

"Amy.. I.. Come here." She said, taking my hand.