Luke Hemmings Shorts

BSM - The W O R S T

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY! AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE GREATEST COUNTRY ON EARTH! GOD BLESS AMERICA 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

I fEeL sO pAtRiOtIc

OOOOH SAY CAN YOU SEEEEEEE

🎆🎇🎆🎇🎆🎇🎆

(It probably won't still be the Fourth of July by the time I publish this but hey it's the thought that counts)

Luke:  
"Luke! I need more shorts!" You complained as you tore through your closet. None of your old shorts fit, with one exception, and you were wearing them.

"Whyyyyyyyy? How many pairs of shorts does one girl need?" He sighed loudly from his bedroom across from yours, obviously opposed to the idea of taking you shopping.

"More than one," you shot back irritably.

"Just get the poor girl some more shorts," you heard Ashton mumble to your brother. They had been "working" on a new song in Luke's bedroom for a while now, but you doubted any real work was getting done.

"Yeah! Listen to your boyfriend!" You teased, knowing it would rile him up.

"He's NOT my boyfriend Y/N."

...

Three hours later you were standing in the middle of Kohl's wondering where you had gone so terribly wrong in life.

Luke ultimately was persuaded by you and Ashton to go shopping, pulling Calum and Michael along for the ride.

It was terrible. Shopping with four overgrown children was really the worst thing ever.

You were hunting through the juniors section, trying to find something you liked while Calum constantly knocked things over, Michael only grabbed you things not your size, Luke complained it was all too short, and Ashton... well you actually weren't sure where Ashton was, he had just kind of melted into the denim landscape a few minutes prior.

"Oh fu- crap!" You looked behind you and away from the display of rompers to see Calum furiously trying to pick up like eight pairs of shorts he had miraculously torn off of their rods.

"What about these?"

You nearly had a heart attack as Michael popped up next to you out of nowhere, holding a pair of denim short shorts.

Before you could tell him that those were outrageously big, Luke too magically appeared to voice his opinion.

"NO! No! no! nO NONONO!" He shook his head furiously.

"Mama Mia! Mama Mia! Mama Mia! Let me go!" Ashton's voice floated over from the dress section.

"The inseam," Luke's drama pulled you away from going to investigate the illusive creature that is Ashton, "IS LIKE HALF AN INCH?! WHAT DOES THAT COVER?!" He shrieked and ripped the shorts from Michael's hand. In order to demonstrate his point, he held them up so that his face could be seen right through one leg hole to the other. "THIS IS A DENIM THONG DISGUISED AS SHORTS?! THEY'RE SELLING JEAN-THONGS HERE!" With that outburst he again disappeared, taking the offending shorts with him.

"You could've just said no," Michael called after him.

Calum laughed at that, and the gum he had been chewing fell out of his mouth onto the floor.

He let out a noise you could only describe as a dying seal and promptly scooped up the little white mass from the floor. "Noooooo," he frowned.

Ashton leaned through the display right behind Calum, so that only his face popped through the collection of taco-themed shirts. His neck craned so that he could whisper into his friends ear.

"I dare you to put it back into your mouth." Immediately after he retreated back into the shirts, but you could still see his eyes poking through as he watched. And waited. Like a predator stalking his prey.

"No?!" Calum looked legitimately disgusted by that.

"I'll give youuuuu," Luke again decided to make an appearance, rifling through his pockets, "thirty-seven cents, some lint, a wrapper, and a condom." He pulled out all of the items and laid them flat on his palm for Calum to inspect.

"You just keep loose condoms in your pockets? Not like in your wallet or something?" Michael seemed confused as Calum examined the lint more carefully.

"Never know when you're gonna need one," Luke smirked cockily, earning a loud harrumph from some rustling jeans nearby.

"I'm not sure this is worth it," the bassist admitted, looking at the nasty piece of gum in his hand warily. You were like twenty seven percent sure it had a random hair stuck to it.

"I'll give you a blowjob," Michael wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"Deal," Calum grabbed it all from Luke's hands in one fluid motion, then stuffed the floor gum back in his mouth.

You almost gagged at the sight as Luke let out a loud "ewwwwww" and Michael turned a light shade of green. "You better brush your teeth later."

"Anything for you babe," Calum winked and blew a bubble.

"I am actually disgusted," you announced, looking at Calum with a mixed glare of disgust and amusement.

He shrugged, "if nobody else was around I probably would've just picked the hair off and chewed it anyway."

"GROSS! WOW OKAY I DIDN'T NEED TO KNOW THAT," you pressed your hands against your ears and began to walk away.

"JUST BEING HONEST!" Calum yelled loud enough for you to hear.

"I WOULD'VE PREFERRED A LIE!" You replied.

A hand holding a hanger with a pair of shorts your size came flying out of a rack of bikinis. You recognized the bronzed skin and long fingers as Ashton's, and felt a lot better knowing someone was in task. You took the shorts and thanked him.

You thought you heard a mumbled, "you're welcome," before the bikinis shifted, signaling Ashton leaving.

"Y/N WHAT'S THE INSEAM?!"

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That was random huh

Idek anymore my dudes