The Most Beautiful Thing

Chapter 23

Chapter 23
Set you free

Narating ko ang building ulit habang patuloy ang luha ko. Sinalubong ako ni Vee and when I saw her, I hugged her agad at saka umiyak.

"W-wala na siya Vee.." I cried.

Hinawakan ni Vee ang buhok ko habang nakayakap ako sakanya. The people who are passing by are looking at us pero wala na akong paki. I'm too hurt to care.. gusto ko lang ilabas ang lahat ng nararamdaman ko.

Sobrang sakit pala makita na ang mahal mo, and the only guy who really loved you walk away from you. He's the most beautiful thing that has ever happened to me... and yet pinakawalan ko pa siya.

Max is my the one that got away. We are just a pair of  lines na once nag-cross, pero maghihiwalay din. Kung ano man yun, a 5 day fling or what you call it, ngayon ay wala na. Pati narin siguro ang friendship namin.

"Shhhh... it's okay Ria.." she said.

I wanted to believe her. Gusto ko maniwala na everything will be okay, even though I know it will take time. Pero sana, maging okay na ang lahat. Please spare me from all the heartaches I will feel dahil sa ginawa ko.

If love is a wonderful feeling, why does it require sacrifice? Bakit masakit?

KINABUKASAN, nagising ako sa bed ni Cassie. Lahat kami ay nag-sleepover, and this is the day one of my heartbreak journey. Pagod na akong umiyak, pwede bang ngumiti naman?

"Good morning!" Cassie said as she entered my room. "Are you ready to battle your sadness today?"

Sa likod naman niya ay pumasok si Jane and Vee na may hawak na peanut butter pancakes, my favorite. Ngumiti ako sakanila at nilapag nila yun sa bed, umupo naman sila sa dulo.

"We're going to school today.. pero naisipan namin mag black market later since wednesday ngayon! Are we g? Let's go bad decisions?" Cassie said enthusiastically.

Tinignan siya ni Vee at bumalik sakin ang tingin nito. "I don't think it's a good idea, Cass.. she's still healing from everything that has happened and I think we already had too much alcohol.."

Tumingin naman ulit sakin si Cassie. "What? Drinking is a good way to forget!"

Hindi totoo yun, alam ko dahil matagal ko ng ginagawa yun. In fact, I met Max because of that. But to be honest I think I'm fed up with just staying here. Siguro nga tama sila, I need to unwind.

"Okay.." I said.

"We'll go?" Jane asked me again and tinignan naman si Vee. I know both of them doesn't want to do this because of me at alam nilang I'm still going through it but I want to assure them na okay ako.

"Wait, I'm not forcing you ah!" Sabi ni Cassie because napansin nya ang tingin ni Jane and Vee sakanya. Tumawa naman ako. I nodded in reply at nginitian siya.

"It's my choice.." final kong sagot sakanila.

Pag-tapos non ay lahat na kami nag-ayos for school. Lahat kasi kami may pasok ngayon, and hindi kami pwede mag-absent. We all went to school using Cass' car at nag-hiwalay na kami for our class.

I don't know how I survived the day, knowing that pumasok pa ako despite what I'm feeling. I have to go to school even if wala na akong motivation pa pumasok since this is my last year at kailangan ko ipasa ang mga subjects ko in order to graduate. Finals are coming at next week na yun, so kailangan ko umayos.

Same old, I talked to my friends, got through this day and also just... wrote. Nag-sulat lang ako the whole day and even though may ngiti ako sa labi habang harap ang iba.. I'm hurting. Maybe that's what I'm feeling... depression hits you up not only at night pero also sa umaga when you're around people, struggling to get through the day.