Out of her league

Chapter 37

Tanya's POV

I woke up with a jolt. Was it all a dream?

No, it wasn't.

And I honestly don't care.

But I do.

His bloodshot eyes and his tightening jaws told me everything. He never liked me in that way. He never did. It was just me, being the stupid me, falling for someone way better than me and getting my heart broken again. I felt a lukewarm teardrop dribble down my left cheek. I know I shouldn't be crying. Cuz what's the point? I still don't regret it. Kissing him. I never will regret that. Although I know he probably can't easily forgive me for that. He can stop talking to me or even move out of this house. The taste of his lips will still linger on my lips. If I said I wanted more, that will be greed.

It was 6am in the morning and Sidd's bedroom door was still closed. Of course. Who woke up at this time on a Sunday? Seriously? But something in me wanted to go and find him; see what he was doing. But I can't just barge into his door and invade his privacy. I am just his friend. Possibly not even a friend anymore ... just go inside the freaking room No, I shouldn't. But I found myself walking towards his room anyway. Such a nosy idiot. I have never been this nosy. But here I am. It's my feet's fault, not mine. I can always try to reason, but I know that I have changed ever since a certain someone moved in here. For some reason, the first thing I did was to place my ears near his door. I donno why but well... it was eerily silent. He's sleeping, you stupid fish.

I opened the door trying not to create any noise and yet there was a slight creak sound from the hinge of the quite old-not-so-old door. Oh god. The last thing I wanted was for Sidd to think I was a crazy stalker. Oh, I forgot that I already looked like one. I realised my eyes were shut tightly. Probably cuz I was scared of seeing him awake. I opened my eyes to the sight of Sidd's eyes blankly fixed on me. He was lying on his bed facing the side of the door and he was covered with a plain yet fluffy maroon blanket. He had no expression in his face. But his cheeks were tinged bright red and his brown eyes fixated on my eyes and I could feel a shiver run down me. I felt exposed. He was looking right through me; his eyes did not move around but somehow I felt like somehow he was still scrutinising everything in me. His eyebrows creased and his hands moved out of his blanket and he took his blanket away and sat up.

"Why are you here?"

He was not wearing a shirt and he was wearing a pair of grey sweatpants. That's when I saw those godly... oh god... I had never seen such perfect abs before. I am ogling at him. Lord, I need to stop myself. How the hell could someone look so perfect? A sharp cough. Who dat nuisance? That was Sidd.

"Uh-uhm sorry," I croaked out. Embarrassinggggg.... I probably looked like I was glaring at the floor but no, I wanted to glare at my own self. "Why are you here?" He questioned me with his raspy voice. Um, no reason, just wanted to creep you out, that's all. Continue sleeping while I admire your beauty till you wake up again. I wasn't going to say that. "Uh..." what the hell am I supposed to say? "Uh.... um.... sorry for what happened last night," although I did not feel sorry because... how could I feel sorry if I did not regret it ? I looked up out of curiosity. At this point of time, I would be lying if I said I was not sad, but I knew it. I knew he deserved way better than me and there wasn't even a flicker of hope in me that told me that he liked me back and so, why was I going to try?

It's the change in the shade of his eyes that I saw first. A tinge of red occupied the whites of his eyes and his eyes turned the darkest brown I had ever seen. Those show anger. Fury. There was flame. And then it changed to the Colour of copper, his eyes looked softened. Like he was sad.

"It's okay, I know it was a mistake,"

"It wasn't"