ANGEL

MAYA - PART 3

At our room, we are fifteen pupils and ascendants, me, Bronce the weeping girl that has my age, my length but not my hair and resemblance, while she has mat black curled hair, fat cheeks, brown eyes and one look of fearful that just Bronce has, I have a long and straight blond hair that run down through my backs, black eyes and blushed cheeks, besides us, a redhead girl that has her hair so orange that´s almost a livid and strong blood-colored red and she´s so excited and lively as myself when to learn the techniques, a boy of brown hair and green eyes with showy freckles at his nose and that always wander back and forth through the halls of the domain with his handful of books and notes to never forget anything, I remember that once he pronounced one of his spells of perception through the mirror, one precious and deft spell that Nizara taught us and that consist about keep your gaze fixedly into the mirror and penetrate slowly into yourself, with the help of some words, bring forth the perfect flow that´s the source of your main feelings but sufferings too, it stay located at the inferior part of your heart and you have besides the words, to use your fingertips and gently with them, touch the surface of your chest and push it up till touch the middle of your forehead, then you concentrate your gaze into that point and will move it away from you, the farther you can and keep the flow there; this spell it´s very good and many times work, it help certainly to eliminate if not totally at least partially your emotional flow from you, besides it grant power, balance and strength enough to make you get through the first proofs faster…

But it didn´t happen with the boy.

Instead of Instead of move his flow away when he touched his forehead, he keep his fingertips too long there and result it´s that the flow stayed there and he had many troubles with it; firstly he passed out after the magic finished and turned weaker than usual, but the worse it´s that his main emotions stayed concentrated inside his temple and each time he expressed some feeling, even the smallest and more insignificant he had strong headaches, but very strong and even with all his intelligence and brilliant capacity to learn and absorb new spells and techniques of control, he hadn´t come to the level where you know how master and lead the more acute, weakening and real pains that one still being have as  the oldest ascendants, then it made he lost his control and scream certain times, he should have made more effort at least but mainly wait a little more to control and domain completely the art of the magics, especially the biggest and hardest ones, he´s just an seven years old boy as me after all and everything here at our rising it´s about control and neutrality, if you fly off the handle with your own conscience, you won´t die, worse, you will have to spend the rest of your life of one progressive and destructive way, spoiling and damaging your spirit with the curse of the alive, the real life and its burden.

The other children are one curious and hurried girl that are clever at her way, but too much impetuous and impatient, i am sick to hear her talk with Nizara Blank and ask to let her go through the next levels and proofs faster than the others, i know she must has her reasons but i don´t know if all this haste will help her to conquer the unreality so gloriously as she hope, well, up to now she has done everything perfectly and her domain upon herself seems to me impeccable, all of us are trained and warned to never make friendships with anyone, neither become attached with our own bodies because even it will disappear once that the rising´s complete, but each time i feel her presence, i even need to look at her, i feel something´s wrong, i don´t know why, i was not supposed to feel it, that make me remember i am just one more stupid, weak and incompetent girl that if don´t stop to feel shudders through her body as some kind of premonition, will have to deal with her merciless being and the dying spirit.

Between all of them, still have one boy with big glasses that each thing or person he stare to, he seems to be with his eyes at the dead point, as one statue, completely hypnotized, some shy girls and boys at the bottom of the room that arrived at our class this year and therefore, are beginner at the domain and beside them, farther at the left, is Neyk Moron, one boy with an gray-blond hair, darker than mine, blue eyes, a little taller than me and that always keep with his arms placed behind him, clasped together and his expression it´s most times, serious, pensive and depressive, i heard once that Neyk Moron is cousin of Bronce Kadu, the weeping girl of earlier and i had to think they have nothing to do one to another, while Bronce is most times emotional, weeping and sensitive, though i know she doesn´t want to be so, Neyk is the total contrary, the few times i realized him, i saw him concentrated and dedicated with the training of the proofs and control, he´s not so advanced as the other girl but he doesn´t seem to be weak and scared as Bronce; certainly he doesn´t even talk with her or show some kind of affection with her, he know he can´t, neither at his thoughts and interior, but i realize that some time or other Bronce give some long stares at him and or Neyk pretend no one is looking at him or when he does, he move his gaze away quickly, probably afraid that Nizara can notice and decide if she send him to the reality of the mysteries or not, but firstly if he really feel afraid sometimes, that´s a bad signal. i look at Neyk out of the corner of my eye and see that he put his hand on his chin and his elbow it´s supported on his other arm that´s crossed on his abdomen, an typical position of thinker, one time watching the cabin with the magic and surprising bubbles and other watching the movements and neutral expressions of Nizara that is at our front, deciding who from all of us will be the first to face the cabin; but something it´s telling me that this time, it won´t be control and domain our main mission.

 

At length when we are placed and lined up already into the silent and mysterious room, Nizara give two slow and reflective steps forward the cabin as if thinking about something with her green-blue fire-looking up hair and her  white mantle-gown with sleeves so long that an part of the cloth fall down upon her hands and at her feet as well, covering it; as Nizara herself told us one day, the gown it´s illusory and not only her, it is the mirror of her not-being soul and cross over her bright skin, giving the idea of juxtaposition, but especially of emptiness before everything she has left behind, mainly herself and the immaculate constant of have let the rising free and prosper her as unreality; now i understand perfectly why Nizara has the white mantle and we have the black mantle as clothe, as weak, emotive, confuse and living real being that we are, we never could cross over the white cloak over us because that´s not the real state of our souls and spirits, our souls and spirits are controlled by sufferings, pains, injuries, emotions, fears, troubles, confusions and affections, everything that certainly damage and would condemn us forever if not by the ascent, the rise and the unreality that give us the illusion of being everlasting strong, chaste, unshakeable and perfect as Nizara seems to be; i say only seems because she´s not really here, her hair it´s false, her white gown it´s the transposition of her stainless soul and her soft and angelical voice that run through our ears as one feather brushing on our skin and that give us shivers, the high conjecture into our minds. Then, that´s it, the color define your condemnation or freedom, your reality or unreality, your glory or ruin, your good performance or failure. From the four years old to six years old you begin at the domain, taking your first steps as one new born baby, but very timidly and slowly because the base of our domain tell us the shock of impact from your first and basic understandings and acknowledges from the great world outside there, namely, Maya itself and all its grandeur, fantasy and spiritualism will converge sometimes with what you will learn here, even being part of the same complexity.