BroKen~ Book 1

FlashBack

"So Why do I have to do this?"

"Virgil I told you this already. This exercise is meant to help shape your control over the illusion. By creating small things for long periods of time we can start to work up a tolerance and that will allow you t..."

"No, I meant why are we doing this AGAIN? This is the second time today you've asked me to create an illusion."

"You are doing again because earlier today I had you attempt to make a pen and instead you made notebook... without any paper."

"Elphie... Look I said I was sorry. I just could think of a pen."

"That's precisely the point, Virgil. You let your thought wonder too much and it causes your spellwork to backfire. Besides..."

"Jumbled up thoughts equal missed opportunities... Yeah, I know."

"Ok then, make a pen." 

Imagining a pen is easy. In fact, there's no issue for me there. When I close my eyes I can see it there, clear as day, a black ballpoint pen with a rubber grip. Like I said easy, what was difficult was keeping my thoughts straight. Last time I did this my thoughts wandered.

It's a pen.

A pen is used to write.

You often write in notebooks.

You use notebooks in school.

If you're in school your a student.

Unless you're a teacher.

Logans a teacher.

He had a notebook.

So did Roman.

Patton had a diary.

I had a diary.

Last time I saw it though...

I ripped out all the pages.

And once again I was staring at an exact copy of my journal. Right down to the doodle on the back, and no pages. I cursed myself under my breath. I could tell Elphie was a bit upset. Not because I failed, no just that... She just... knows I keep thinking of home. 

She's been trying to get me to forgive myself and go talk it out with them since I joined her but... I'm too scared. Not only that but I didn't exactly leave on good terms... Well, actually I didn't leave on any terms really. 

The day I agreed to join up with Elphaba was one of the hardest yet easiest days of my life. I went home for the last time and just grabbed anything I could manage. I knew I was making a lot of sounds and my anxiety started to get the better of me. After all, you can only make so much noise before someone comes asking questions.

The one thing I regret the most about it was I couldn't grab my picture. I tried, but I was startled by someone just standing outside my door, and I ended up dropping to the floor breaking it. I left quickly after that, just managing to miss whoever it was as they opened my door.

Since then she has been trying to get me to go back, even if it's just to talk. She's been trying to teach me not only "Magik" but also ways to cope and function. Honestly, she's like little fusion of Logan and Patton. A teacher and a Parent... She would teach me ways to cope with my chronic illnesses and ways to deal with my anxiety. She once spent the entire day spewing off mantras like there was no tomorrow, but you know it helped. Even if a lot of them only made me laugh. 

"Virge, why don't you go take a break. We'll try again later." I could tell Elphie was tired. She hasn't been sleeping well since she the letter from Glinda. I worry about her. I have this... feeling that something really important is going to happen... but also something REALLY SCARY!