BroKen~ Book 1

Virgil (Ch.21) <The End>

Well happy birthday to me. It's been a month but the past won't let me be. My photographic memory, now a curse as visions of the past cross my mind for the 5 time this hour.

I did it... I actually did it. I made a promise to myself and Elphie. OH MY GOD ELPHIE! I.. Didn't even. I didn't even try to help you. You told me not to and I listen but even after. I... I didn't.

I sat in the middle of my bedroom crying into my arms. The lights in my room flickering uncontrollably as thoughts of what happened flooded my mind. Pain shot up through me as I started to lose control. I wrapped my hoodie around me and slowly climbed into bed hoping the pain would soon subside. It's been like this for a month now. I'd finally start to calm down, a thought will pass my mind and I'm freaking out all over again. My body can't handle the constant surge of power.  Another surge of pain blast through my skull as my thought take over again.

They all saw it. They saw that side of me. Patton... Logan... ROMAN. They were scared, so scared of me they couldn't move. They... They...

"Kiddo? You in there?" NO NO NO NO! Go away, please go away. I don't want to see that fear again. Please, Dad just...

"GO AWAY!" I didn't mean to say that out loud. My voice warping worse than ever since the seel broke. I heard Patton walk away and I know hurt him. I didn't mean to! The pain flared up again as another surge of energy caused the lights to flicker again. I wrapped my self farther into my blanket, falling asleep to the sound of electricity buzzing around me.

My dreams were filled with screams and pain. Red and black covered my vision as I drowned in the noise. The screaming got louder and louder, and an intense banging sound surrounded me matching the pace of my heartbeat. I couldn't escape it, no matter how much I tried.

"Anxiety!" I shot up out of bed just in time to see my door flying off the hinges. Roman was standing there holding Bast in his arms, a look of worry etched on his face. 

Stop just stop.

Bast jumped down and just sat beside the door, still in cat form.

Stop being worrying about me!

Roman could see I was struggling. He started to walk towards me but I flinched causing him stop in his tracks.

Stop being sad for me!

Another step and the lights started to flicker.

Stop being scared for me!

Another step and the air around got thick. 

Stop being scared of me!

I started to lose my breath. My pulse getting even faster despite never having calmed after the dream.

Stop caring about me!

Roman got even closer and my head started to hurt. I couldn't take it. I just want this to stop.

Stop caring at all!

Pain flared throughout my body, and the lights began to flicker.

Just stop...

Roman took a step back.

Please just...

He actually... took a... step...

"LEAVE ME ALONE." Intense pain shot through me , making my whole body feel like it was melting, as a wave of energy shot out from me. It knocked Roman out of my room and pinned him against his own bedroom door. I watched as my wall slowly warped, filling up the hole made by my missing door. It took only a few seconds for the doorway to fully vanish but during that time... Roman never took his eyes off mine.

I allowed myself to collapse onto my floor, the fatigue, having gotten the better of me. Tears fell from my eyes, blurring the room around me, until all I saw was white. The door was gone. The door to the mind palace was gone. My house was no longer connected... I was no longer connected to them. 

A feeling of emptiness washed over me making the room even colder. I don't have anyone anymore. Not Roman, or Patton... Or Logan, or... Elphie. She needed me and I didn't do shit for her. She was there for me and I couldn't even muster enough courage to save her fucking life. Instead ROMAN SAVED HER, but he couldn't do it again. No one can do everything. He... and I STILL couldn't fight. I STILL couldn't help her and now shes. 

My face burned as the tears finally spilled from my eyes. The tears burned my skin like acid to paper.  I just laid there on the floor, this pain is nothing compared to the rest of it. I fell asleep again to smell of burning and the taste of salt.

"Nyah... SPIDERS!" I was startled awake again. I grabbed my blanket off the bed and wrapped myself like a burrito. I don't know what woke me up but I am still not ready to deal with anything. I put my headphones on and closed my eyes. 

Whispers broke through the music. Where there people outside my house? I got up and looked out my window, but saw no one. I took my headphones off, set them on the nightstand, and opened my window, hoping to at least hear whatever was making those sounds.

"But if need be, I will destroy them for you, Patton?" Roman? No, it can't be, he was just at the mind palace. They don't know where I live, they couldn't possibly.

"Thanks, but let's call them what they are Roman." WHERE ARE THEY? There is no denying Dad's voice. But... How... Why...

"Spider Curtains"

"Creepy crawly death dealers." Wait, Spider curtains? MY SPIDER CURTAINS?!

"Okay." I ran out of my room and glanced down the stairs. T-Thomas was j-just s-standing there. H-how d-did they g-get here? Why b-bring T-Thomas?!

"Alright, like, if this is his room... Where is Anxi-" I snapped

"What are you doing in my room?!"