I Won't Give Up (A Big Time Rush Fanfiction)

Bonding

Here's another chapter, you guys! I'm gonna try to write another chapter for my FFnet story too, as well as the next chapter for this :)

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Today was my turn to get injected with the poison that is chemotherapy. I wanted to say that I hated everything, but with the exception of this problem, my life hadn’t been too bad. To keep my mind of the fact that I felt like puking, I just thought about all the positive things in my life. Mom loved me, I didn’t really have any friends but I was making new friends in the hospital, I was rich (not that money is everything), I had a nice home to live in, and...um...I wasn’t living on the streets. 

Okay, as true as that all was, I didn’t feel it helping. Before I could even have time to think, I was grabbing the basin and throwing up. This was definitely the worst part of chemo. Well, that and the fact that my hair had thinned out to the point that I had to wear a baseball cap to cover it up. 

“Do you ever wonder what would happen if someone, like, could actually heal themselves at will?”

I turned to glare at Kendall. Okay, someone remind me why he wasthe one watching me while Logan was busy canoodling with McKinley in the cafeteria and everyone else was off doing God-knows-what. Here’s what I thought about Kendall Knight. He was stubborn, rude, irritating, aggravating, obnoxious, did I mention irritating?

“Whoa, don’t get your panties in a bunch! I was just saying.”

“Yeah? Well, I’m sure that if we could all heal ourselves at will, we’d have done it by now.” I growled, cringing as I handed the basin to my nurse. 

God, I hated that look he gave me. That innocent look like I was the crazy one. If I was so crazy, then I would know.

“Cool the attitude, alright? I was just trying lighten the mood.”

As hard as I tried to hold back my scoff, I just couldn’t do it. I scoffed at him, narrowing my eyes in an aggravated glare. I had never had the desire to kill someone, not even Kendall, but I was tempted to lock him in a closet and throw away the key. I wish Mom had stayed instead of going downstairs to the cafeteria, but she hadn’t eaten all day.

“What? Don’t think I’m capable of being nice?”

“Didn’t think it was possible.” I said softly, pulling the hood of my Minnesota Wild hoodie over my hairless head. Was it even possible to feel worse than this? Every time I went to chemo, there was always a part of me that kind of welcomed the idea of death. Of course I didn’t really want to die, but when I felt this horrible, I kind of didn’t feel like I’d care.

“Well, you’re wrong. Again, I’m jusssttt saying.”

‘I’m just saying.’ Oh, shove it.

“Look, I’d prefer a little peace and quiet right now, so if you could just shut up for five minutes, that’d be awesome.” I turned onto my side, my back facing him. I could feel the nausea getting worse, but I’d found that if I laid in a certain position, that it lessened it a little bit. Focusing my mind on something else was even more helpful.

Surprisingly enough, he actually obeyed my request.

For a couple minutes.

“So, I noticed that you’re a Minnesota Wild fan. That’s my favorite team.”

“Mine too.” I said in a low whisper. Well, I guess that’s one thing we had in common. Before the diagnosis, I’d played on my school’s hockey team. I was in the running to be captain for senior year, but that would be going to another guy. I was happy for him, but there was a part of me that wished that I could be the team captain.