conversations // prinxiety ✔

♥ 40 - tell me ♥

(a/n: i love reading the comment threads, like yEs MY CHILDREN MAKE FRIENDS I LOVE YOU ALL

also this chapter is just me stanning the idea of logan being aggressively loving because "WE GET IT, YOU'RE ADORABLE"

and this chapter is pretty shitty oops i changed some stuff so idk if it makes sense now)

*patton's pov*

I couldn't even think about doing it. Obviously, it was the right thing to do, but... I can't be aggressive! (Usually.)

And what'll happen when none of us can lie anymore? We'd all be so much more vulnerable than before.

I cried into the pillow next to Logan. He slowly woke up and noticed me, so he put his hand on my cheek gently.

"Are you nervous, darling?" he whispered.

I sniffed and nodded.

His voice was dry and tired. "What you are feeling is completely normal. This is a scary plan. But you are one of the strongest people I know, and we can get through this together. When we do it, I'll be right there by your side and Deceit won't see us, but Virgil will know were there. He's not going to find us, okay? He'll be gone soon and we'll all be happy, okay?"

"...but- but what happens when none of us can lie anymore?"

He didn't answer for a seemingly long time. "I'm... not sure. But I'm sure we'll all be happy. Who knows? Maybe there'll be a new Deceit to take his place and he won't be as... psycho. That's a theory from most facets in the mind, and it might be true. It seems very likely, but we cannot be sure, for a trait hasn't died before. Other than Roman, but he isn't truly dead anyway. And Virgil, but he didn't die-"

"What happened to Virgil that you guys aren't telling me about?"

*logan's pov*

How could I tell him?

He'd be heartbroken. Virgil said he took out those memories from Patton and put just a couple of mine back.

How could I tell him we were the reason he nearly died?

I guess I stayed silent for too long, because Patton said, "Hello? Logan, why are you ignoring me? You always do that!"

Ignoring?

Always?

Suddenly, one memory came rushing back.

"Lo, I love you a lot. But you keep ignoring me! Like, whenever we're doing a video, you don't pay attention to me... And then you act like I'm not there sometimes when I try to talk to you..."

He was on the verge of tears. "And it seems like you don't tell me anything! Do you not trust me? Am I not good enough for you?"

I didn't know what to say so I stood there with my mouth dry and slightly opened. Finally, I said, "Patton, I- I never meant t-"

"It's like you don't care about me... And I feel like we should break up."

"...Patton, I- I mean," I choked on my words, "i-if that's what you feel what's best."

And he left.

"It seems like you don't tell me anything! Do you not trust me? Am I not good enough for you?"

Oh God. It was happening. "Patton, I- I never meant t-"

"Seriously! Do you think I'm stupid? Just tell me, Logan!"

"Your entire life would be fucked up if you knew, alright? Trust me, you don't want to know."

"Why don't you think I can handle it?"

"Because- I- I care about you and I know you'll end up hating yourself."

His expression softened. "...what happened?"

Then, everything came back. It seemed like Virgil took out almost every trace of Deceit from us.

"I still need to talk to Virgil about it... I don't know if he wants you to know."

He huffed. "Fine."

He turned over and muttered, "good night."

♥

Neither of us fell asleep, but we were both pretending, until long after.

When he did fall asleep, I heard him talking.

"...hate myself? I already hate myself, why should it matter?!" he mumbled in his sleep.

I sat straight up and shook him awake. He looked at me in confusion.

"What the FUCK did you just say, Patton?!" I demanded.

He seemed like he was trying to remember, before his eyes widened and he realized what happened. "Lo, I-I didn't... I didn't mean it..."

"All of us are kind of fucked up, Patton! I don't tell you some things, but you don't tell me some things, so why were you so angry?!"

"Because! I..." He didn't continue his sentence and he looked down with guilt.

Looking at his face, I heard the same words over and over again from the day we broke up... that he doesn't know about.

"It's like you don't care about me..."

"It's like you don't care about me..."

"It's like you don't care about me..."

"It's like you don't care about me..."

"Logan, it's just... Sometimes, it's like you don't care about me..."

I felt horrible. "Are. You. Serious? I care about you more than anyone in the world! Why don't you understand that? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? Just because you don't like yourself doesn't mean that there aren't people who love you! You aren't stupid at all! Fuck off, you are the greatest thing that's ever happened to me!"

He blinked several times in confusion. "I-I'm getting mixed emotions from you... Um..."

"I love you so much! I love you and I would buy you a palace if I could! I could be your servant if you really wanted me to! I love you more than life! Nobody in the world cares about you more than I care about you, okay? And I hate keeping secrets from you, but I promise, I'll tell you soon!" I yelled.

He smiled slightly at me despite my yelling. "Iloveyoutoopleasestopyellingatme!"

I took a second to cool off. "I apologize. I became aggressive for no good reason. You have every right to be worried that I'm keeping things from you. But I swear that you will know soon if you really want to, okay?"

He pursed his lips but nodded.

"I'm sorry."

He buried his face in my chest. "I love you."

"I love you more. Good night. Sweet dreams."

♥

*virgil's pov*

They're cute together, but they really need to learn how to shut up while I'm sleeping.

I fell asleep soon after it was quiet again though.

I imagined Roman singing me to sleep and telling me, "Dulces sueños" before he fell asleep on his own.

At least I had a bit more time left before things got hectic again.

(a/n: moxiety or analogical? bc i want a second book to work on)