Young and Married

Chapter XXV

Chapter XXV

Natulog ako sa cottage namin ni Zack ngunit hindi ko alam kung doon din ba siya natulog o kung saan siya natulog. Sa sobrang pagod ko kagabi at dahil sa takot na baka mapahamak ang mga anak ko sa nararamdaman kong sama ng loob at stress ay pinilit kong matulog kahit na sobrang daming pumapasok sa isip ko.

"Mukhang nagpuyat kayo ni Zack kagabi." nakangiting bati sa akin ni Ate Stella habang naghihintay kami ng agahan. Nasa gilid ko si Zack, tahimik at walang emosyon.

Wala sina Alexa at Clinton. Walang binanggit si Ate Stella kung nasaan ang dalawa. Sina Mama at Papa ay maagang nag-almusal at maaga ding umalis para sa island hopping nila.

I just smiled at Ate Stella. Hindi ko alam kung napansin niya ang kakaibang tension sa paligid namin. Hindi kami nag-usap buong almusal. Tahimik akong kumain at ganoon din si Zack. Nang matapos ang pinakatahimik na almusal sa buong buhay ko ay nagpaalam si Ate Stella na mamasyal siya sa resort.

"Sasama ako, Ate Stella. Gusto ko ding mamasyal sa resort." I said.

Umiling si Ate Stella sa akin. She held my hand and looked into my eyes straightly.

"No, Paige. You and my brother needs to talk. Kung ano mang pinag-awayan niyo ay pag-usapan niyo. You have to fix it before it get worse."

Nagulat ako sa kanyang sinabi ngunit nanatili ang aking ekspresyon sa mukha.

"Maybe not now, Ate." I whispered and smiled a bit.

"Kapag hindi niyo 'yan inayos ngayon, baka hindi niyo na maayos sa susunod."

Without waiting for my response, Ate Stella walked away from us. I was left alone with Zack. The silence between us is almost deafening.

Pinag-iisipang kong mabuti ang sinabi ni Ate Stella. Totoong dapat ayusin namin ang away namin kung gusto naming magpatuloy sa relasyon namin. Mahirap magpatuloy sa isang relasyon alam niyong dalawa na may lamat, may duda, may galit at may sama ng loob. Inaalala ko din ang aking pagbubuntis dahil natatakot akong mapahamak ang mga bata dahil sa stress na nararamdaman ko.

Sa kabilang banda, gusto ko munang pahupain ang emosyon sa pagitan naming dalawa. Gusto ko na kapag sinubukan naming mag-usap at ayusin ang mga bagay na pinagkagalitan namin ay nasa matino kaming pag-iisip at hindi iyong pangungunahan kami ng aming mga nararamdaman dahil magkakasakitan lamang kami pareho kung iyon ang gagawin ko.

"I'm sorry, Paige." Zack said.

I looked at him and he is looking at me, too. His eye bags are evident, making me infer that he did not slept. I held my breath and calmed myself before speaking.

"I'm hurt, Zack. I don't understand." I said with full honesty.

"I know. I'm angry with myself for being such an ass." he said. "But Paige, I really, really am sorry."

"What you did to your brother and me is wrong. Do you know that?" I asked while punishing him with my dagger looks.

"Yes, I know."

"Do you really want me to forgive you?" I asked.

"Yes. I will do anything." he replied with full conviction and the sincerity and hope in his eyes are apparent.

"Apologize to you brother." I said.

Bahagyang umawang ang kanyang labi nang maintindihan ang aking sinabi. Pagkatapos ng ilang saglit ay nagtiim ang kanyang bagang. Mukha siyang nagpipigil ng emosyon. Ilang saglit pa ay nagpakawala siya ng isang buntong hininga. Tahimik akong naghintay ng kanyang sasabihin.

Hindi ko alam kung anong sasabihin ni Zack sa aking sinabi. Hindi ko din alam kung galit ba siya dahil sa aking hinihiling. Ang pag-aalinlangan niyang magsalita ay isang malaking patunay kung gaano kabigat para sa kanya ang aking hinihiling.

"Do you really want that?" he asked.

Tumango ako.

"I won't." nagulat ako sa kanyang sagot. "You don't know and you don't understand what he have done to me. If you will keep on insisting that favor, then it's better for us to separate ways." he said. Tumayo siya at naiwan akong mag-isa na gulat sa kanyang mga sinabi.

I feel angry with him because of his reason. His pride and ego is hovering over him and it's killing his sanity.

I held my stomach as I try to calm myself. Sumakit na naman kasi ito. Medyo nag-aalala na ako dahil naramdaman ko din itong sumakit kagabi. I think I need to go back to the hospital and have a check-up to be certain that there is nothing wrong with my children.

"Can we talk?"

Nilingon ko ang nagsalita at nakita si Clinton. Nakapamulsa ito. He look stressed but his manly features are still evident making him look snob and serious. Umupo siya kung saan umalis si Zack. Nanatili ang kamay ko sa aking sinapupunan.

"What did you do to Zack to make him that angry to you?" I asked.

Nilingon niya ang maliit na pigura ni Zack na malayo na mula sa aming kinatatayuan. Pagkatapos ng ilang segundo ay ibinalik niya sa akin ang kanyang tingin.

"What did you asked him to do?" he asked.

"I asked him to apologize to you."

Tumango siya at mas lalong sumeryoso ang mukha. From his looks, I can see that this is also a serious matter for him. Anong nangyari dati upang magkagalit ang dalawang magkapatid?

"Four years ago, he took his entrance examination. He originally wants to be a pilot. One week before his medical exam, I took him to a party. We got into a fight. I was drunk so I left him to call for help because I can't fight. When I returned, his eyes were badly injured. He failed his entrance exam."

"What happened?"

"And then almost one year ago, Alexa broke up with her. Zack lover her so much. She broke up with and it broke him, too. But she did not broke up with him without a valid reason. She was depressed and suicidal."

"Zack became impatient because he wanted to start a family with her but she's unstable. She knew that their relationship won't work anymore. Their relationship was broken because of Alexa's rejection to marry Zack. Their hearts were broken, too. Alexa flew to Europe and met me," he looked at the sea before speaking again.

"I talked to your father before flying to Europe and he asked me to wait if I am really serious with my feelings for you. I knew that it would be tough because I am not sure of your feelings for me. You're young and I'm what? 28 years old? Your father even called me a pedophile. I called myself worse than that. What can I do? I love you. So I decided to try to forget about you again. I met her. We clicked but it didn't last because I discovered that Alexa's my brother's ex-girlfriend. Zack was furious, I broke up with her."

He looked at me once again. I can't explain the emotion he's showing me. My heart broke because of his confession. He tried to smile and try to wash away his frustrations. His tears are about to drop. I bite my lips as I watch him restrain himself from showing his emotions in front of me.

"I really, really love you, Iris. But what can I do? I don't want to hurt my brother anymore."