Dysfunctional (Sequel to Soft Whispers)

Lies

"I didn't write this" Chresanto stated as he looked at the note that I managed to dig out of my bag. "It's not even my handwriting". He looked up at me, "Bri, I didn't write this. I'd never". 

I rubbed at my temples as I sat on my bed. For God's sake, this was ridiculous. 

Okay.

"The only reason I stayed in the waiting room for all that time was because you wouldn't let me see you".

I wouldn't let you see me because of what "you" had writen.

"Do you really think I'd write something like that?" He asked lightly. 

No, that's why I was so sad.

I watched him as he walked over and sat down next to me, he nudged me gently and I nudged him back. 

"You think Shania wrote it? She hasn't messed with you in a while" he stated. I shrugged a little. 

Yeah, maybe.

I messed with my marker as I bit on my bottom lip and I began to think, I looked at Chresanto.

Would you really break up with me for being depressed?

"No". 

Oh. Okay.

"You don't believe me, do you?" 

No... I'm sorry.

"It's okay" he said before kissing my cheek, "I really wouldn't though". 

Yeah?

I laid down as he continued to sit on the edge of the bed, he looked at me and said "yeah".

Tell me something.

"Okay?"

Who were you talking to? The second day you came in and kissed me.

"Oh, I was talking to my dad" he stated, "he wanted me home because I had yet to finish chores and all that other shit, but I said that I couldn't leave yet".

Oh.

"Yeah, and the reason I didn't come yesterday was because he wouldn't let me leave".

Oh, okay. 

I was waiting for you.

"You were?"

I nodded a little as I closed my eyes, I messed with my hair.

"Are you tired?"

I shook my head a little but kept my eyes closed. I suddenly felt his lips against mine and I kissed him, he kissed me back and placed his hands on my sides.

I'm still mad at him.

'He said he didn't write it'.

I don't care.

I felt Chresanto begin to press kisses on my neck and I opened my eyes.

"Sorry, sorry" he apologized, he pushed himself away from me. I shook my head a little, trying to let him know that it was okay... That I kind of liked it. I let my fingers take a hold of his shirt and I pulled him back to me. He looked at me.

"I can just go" he said lightly, I shook my head a little. I went back to kissing him. He slipped his hands under my shirt and I felt his fingers trace my scars, "I wish I knew what it felt like" he murmured, "just so I can help you really cope with it".

I looked up at him and wondered if he really meant it. There was suddenly a knock on the door, "hey, Bri, I wa- Wow, okay". I looked over and saw Ray, he was looking at us. "Sorry to interrupt".

I grabbed my whiteboard:

We weren't doing anything.

"Doesn't look like it".

He's kind of right.

Chresanto moved his hands and inched away from me, I sat up and looked at Ray. "I just wanted to know if you liked the party, but I'll come back later and ask". I watched him leave.

I looked at Chresanto and he shrugged a little, "well".

Well?

"Where were we?" He asked curiously. I looked at him and smiled a little.

You know exactly where we were.

He chuckled and kissed my lips, "right" he murmured. He went back to tracing my scars and I wished I didn't have them. His fingers were light against them and I wondered why he always liked to trace them.

His hands found the waistband of my shorts and I mentally asked myself if I was going to stop him or not. He stopped on his own, "I'm moving too fast" he suddenly murmured, he wasn't talking to me; more to himself.

I looked at him and watched as he sighed, "I'm gonna go" he stated, "I'll come by after school tomorrow". I watched him as he slipped on his jacket and left, I sat up and carefully messed with the ring Jacob bought me when he was alive.

'Jacob, are you a virgin?'

Yes.

'Oh, okay'.

Why do you ask?

'No reason, I was just... I was just wondering'.

You want to have sex with Chresanto, don't you?

'I don't know'.

Hm. Okay.

'What? No yelling, no anger? Nothing? Are you okay?'

Oh, I'm perfectly fine. I've just come to the realization that he truly loves you and that he cares for you. He's going to make sure you're okay. There's nothing I can do anyhow, I'm dead, so I might as well get over my feelings and let you be happy. So if you want to have sex with him, then you can. I'm not stopping you.
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Sorry for any mistakes, I didn't proof read. I'm getting tired of this book, I don't find it interesting anymore, but I guess if people are still reading it then it doesn't matter what I think, as long as I continue to update. Anyway, there's fifteen chapters left to this book. 
Love,
Me.