Broken Hearts And Bruised Egos -Book 1

Chapter 17- River

I'm glad that I got to spend some more time with Blaise today. I think I put too much pressure on myself at first to find out if I had feelings for him. Once I decided to just go with the flow and see what happened it was much easier.

With Trevor I didn't really have time to process what was happening. We kissed and things progressed rather quickly, a little too quickly. I've never even had a boyfriend before. I don't know how to act or what to do in a relationship. So this time with Blaise feels much more my speed. Taking things nice and slow and seeing where it leads is a welcomed approach.

I won't deny that I feel something for Trevor, I absolutely do. I may not be experienced in relationships but I know there is definitely something there. Whether it's just an infatuation or its something more, That is what I need to know.

I went from never having a boyfriend to having two to pick from. I'm exhausted and terrified. The fact the Trevor and Blaise have been best friends for years is really weighing heavy on me. I don't want to be the cause of an ended friendship.

I needed to talk to someone about this. I decide to start with the person who knows me best in this world. My mom.

I head downstairs and find her sitting on the couch wrapped up in a Blanket crying, watching a movie.  The Choice, its her absolute favorite movie of all time but she cries like a baby every time she watches it. I can't believe she still gets this emotional watching this movie after having seen it a million times. I sat down in the recliner and smiled at her. I know better than to interrupt her during this movie.

As I'm watching the movie with her it becomes more clear to me why she gets so emotional. Now that I know about Nathan it makes perfect sense. The male lead has a southern accent, he's charismatic and seems a lot like how she described Nathan. But in this movie the guy fights for love, he doesn't run from it. This movie reminds her of him and has the ending that she wished she could have had. I have so many more questions about her relationship with Nathan but I'm also afraid to push it.

Once the movie was over I gave her a few minutes to compose herself. She grabbed her phone and excused herself to use the bathroom. When she came  back she had a glass of wine in her hand. She wrapped herself back up in the blanket and sat down on the couch.

"How was your day?" She asked smiling.

"It was good. Blaise tried to teach me how to play the guitar, I'm terrible at it."

She laughed. " Did you really expect to be a pro after one lesson?"

" No, but I thought it would be easier."

"So where is Trevor tonight?"

"Out of town, he's helping his godfather pack up his stuff to move up here. Trevor's father just signed him to the label as his new country artist. He will be gone for four weeks."

" I see. I'm surprised he left at all." She said eyeing me, taking a sip of wine. " He seems to be quite attached to you already."

" I know. That's kinda what I want to talk to you about. Between him and Blaise, I have no idea what I am doing."

She laughed, " Honey none of us really knows what we are doing, we are all just winging it."

" Yeah but I went from being invisible to having two guys trying to date me at the same time. I kind of feel slighted. I always thought I would meet a boy in high school in class and we would  become friends and then somehow just awkwardly end up dating. Then we would go to football games, homecoming and proms together. We would probably go our separate ways for college, meet new people and gain life experience. Then maybe we find our way back to each other as adults."