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"Ok Miss Breeding we are actually able to perform the abortion today but the ball is in your court. If you are not ready you could always schedule a appointment and come back another day, you choose." The nurse exited the room where I was left alone to think about what I was about to do.
Honestly I didn't wanna go through with having this procedure because I know it would be wrong, but I was practically carrying a child for the man who caused all of the drama that was going on in my life. The worse part was bringing another child into this world to be fatherless was something I wasn't ready for. I was only five weeks pregnant so I had time to think all of it through, and besides a lot of my family knew about my pregnancy, knowing them they were gonna ask questions or just off the back know what I did. I got off the table and went back out into the lobby, walking over to the front desk where I was met with the kind middle age nurse who was assisting me. "Can I come back, I really came here today unprepared and I am so sorry for wasting your time," I didn't even realize I was crying.
She got up from behind the desk, walking around to me. "Sweet heart listen to me, if you know that your not ready to do it then why get ready. From you walked through those doors you would of done it by now if this was something you really wanted to do. The fact that you have to leave and think about it is already a answer for you." She squeezed my shoulders, "You enjoy the rest of your day ok and stay safe." I turned on my feet headed for the door but it felt as if I was never gonna reach. I wanted to be out of that building so so bad, but it was taking forever.
I finally reached into my car, throwing my hands on the steering wheel, pressing my face down onto it. Letting all of my hurt out, I wasn't crying lately because I was trying to be strong for everyone else but look how it's turning out. TAP!,TAP!, I jumped how frightened I was. It was the nurse from inside the clinic, I rolled my window down. "Hey I just wanted to give you this," she handed me a business card for a counselor. My life must of been written all over my face the fact that she could come all the way down here just to pass me a card to get counseling, I really must of needed it. "Thank you, it was nice of you to bring this down here for me I appreciate that a lot." She walked off leaving a warm smile behind, I started up my car and headed on my way to pick up Nathan.
Maci had her grand opening today so all of the kids and everyone else was down at her new store for the soft opening. I wasn't able to make it because this was the only appointment they had available and it was my only fixed day off. I was happy for her and the blessings she was receiving, I think she did deserve it. Her and Nick was supposedly done but I caught her this morning sneaking out the house doing the walk of shame when I dropped Nathan off. It wasn't my place to address it but I just hope they know what it was they're doing because I wasn't about to stress myself out with them about it because I'm stressed out enough. When I pulled up to the store I was amazed at how beautiful it was and the turnout of the crowd it had gotten for the opening. When I got inside everybody was just busy with either assisting customers or restocking items. As soon as I started walking into the main section of the store Nick pulled me by the arm, "Hey, how you got here before me."
