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I had another session with Dr.McGregor for twelve o'clock but I was running late, I spent most of my morning with my family. We picked up the girls from Vanny's house this morning after our long intimate night, Me and Maci didn't just end everything at the club we went back home and she put my ass to work. She made me want to change that promise ring into an engagement ring right after that but I am not gonna do that until I had faith in my own self that I wasn't going to fuck things up between us ever again. Believe it or not last night was a close call because honestly had she not showed up I probably would've fucked tiny.
As I sat in the parking lot of Dr.McGregor's practice I was in deep thought, thinking about the many issues I face on a day to day basses and honestly, I'm tired. I'm tired of hurting the people that surround me and I'm tired of getting hurt by them. It was going to be in my best interest that after my session today I'd go looking for my brother to make sure everything was going okay with him. I also wanted to let him know that I forgive him for that stunt because only God one knows why he did that, to begin with.
"Good afternoon Mr.Breeding your running late as usual, you better be glad your one of Doc's favorites," the receptionist that sat behind the desk in the lobby said to me as she looked over her glasses. I didn't bother to stop and talk I just gave her a fake smile, a nod and I continued with walking straight to the office where me and Doc normally meet. I knocked on the door twice before entering, it was very obvious she was waiting on my ass because her legs were crossed and she was tapping on her watch.
"I know I'm late you don't even have to tell me, that's my bad I got so caught up with my girls this morning and end up losing track of time."
"It's ok, I'm happy to hear things are going great in your household. First things first I wanna know how did your Thanksgiving dinner go I remembered you told me it was going to be held at your sister's house."
Before I started talking I let out a loud sigh, taking my hat off my head and placing it in my lap. "Wow, where do I start, well for one me and my sister got into it over her new guy friend whom I've never met one day in my life, it's like he just magically popped up outta nowhere. Then after that died down we got into it again because she didn't want me to take my daughter upstairs in her guest room which I thought was dumb at first but then I found out why."
"Ok and what was the reason for her to be behaving that way," Dr.McGregor said while using her hands to talk.
"Well um, I can't really say because ah I mean um I just can't tell you." I watched as she raised her eyebrows at me which wasn't a surprise because I know I was sounding really crazy especially this being the place I'm supposed to talk my problems through and share most of my life with but that topic right there was something I wasn't ready to open up about.
"Well you do know we come here every weekend to talk about the things that are happening now and in your past, that affects you and the way you act right?"
"Yeah I do but that's just something I'm honestly not ready to bring up right at this time, maybe in a session a few weeks from now and I think it's clear for me to talk about it, is that okay with you." She just shook her head at me which made it clear that what I was saying to her was total bullshit.
"Okay well let's talk about your feelings towards your sister's new male friend, it seems to me that you have an obvious issue with him and you also mentioned the fact that he just magically appeared, is that the main reason."
"It's apart of the reason but not the main reason, he's the so-called brother of my nephew's dad and I just find it really creepy that he wants to be around my sister now that his brother isn't around. His brother did my sister dirty and my nephew just got to know his dad about two months before he died so why the fuck someone from his side of the family stepping in like he was number one dad. That nigga told my sister straight up my nephew wasn't fit for his lifestyle so they had to go, that tore my sister apart but after she had him she was put back together like nothing happened and you know why too because my sister had me and my other brother by her side to be the father to him he needed and for some strange ass, clown ass, pussy ass, nigga to come and play daddy with him only to probably do the same is a slap in our faces." I didn't realize it but I was tearing up, I was talking so much that I didn't stop to catch my breath because to me it was a touchy ass subject.
Doc pulled out a few tissue paper for me to wipe my eyes and my runny ass nose. This was my first session I found myself crying hell it was my first time crying over this situation because I'm watching shit play out right in front of me. "Thank you, look the reason I'm hurt even more was because I'm seeing how my sister is changing on me and I know it's because of this dude. She's saying things to me I never thought I'd hear her say and I don't know if I'm really pissing her off because this dude might be around for a good reason but that's my sister and I'm gone always feel some type of way about any nigga that comes into her and my nephew's life because I know the bullshit she then dealt with."
"Ok, I hear everything that you're saying and it's fair that you feel this way because you were always her protector but she may also feel like sometimes you're being overly protective and maybe you are. Your sister is an adult, a human being who will have to face her own battles and get through them on her own, if she asks you to stay out of her business respect her wishes until she says herself it's ok to step in because I'm sure you don't want to lose her or stop speaking to her over something she's asked you before to stay out of. She's a big girl who has her own life let her live it because you won't always be around, continue working on Nick, continue with trying to make Nick a better man for the woman he loves and for the two kids he's trying to raise stop intervening into other people's lives and focus on yours and see how that turns out for you. Now you know the drill come in late sessions get cut short so that's it for today."
We both got up and gave each other hugs, something she recommended says that it makes you feel loved and I totally agree with that. "Okay well you enjoy the rest of your day and I'll go and find my way home to MY FAMILY," I said while putting emphasis on family. I looked down at my watch checking the time as I unlocked my car and jump right in only to see that it was just one thirty in the afternoon so I called Maci up and asked her if she wanted to do something with the girls, just to keep my self out of other peoples business and more involved into mines.
