hard to love

chapter 40

jaxs POV

i couldnt believe what tara just told me. taylor was gonna leave too but she didnt even bother to tell me. i walked in to the clubhouse and went to my dorm and slammed the door. a few minutes later taylor walked in.

"get out trager." i told her without looking at her i knew it was her without looking up.
"not happenin teller." she said sitting on the bed next to me.
"is it true." i said not fully asking but stating the fact.
"somewhat i got-" she said.
i stood up "how is it somewhat youre either leavin or not. which is it taylor?!" i yelled.
"if you would fuckin let me talk you would find out!!" she yelled walking up to me. we were toe to toe and in each other face.
"theres aint shit to find out. how long have you known? how long until you leave?" i asked stepping back trying to calm down. i couldnt believe she didnt tell me, that was the main thing i was mad about. she knew she could tell me anything.

she sat back down on the bed and got a cigarette out.
"a recruitor came to the house a while ago and offered me a full ride to the new york film academy. i dont plan on going. if anything ill do their online classes and if theres anything i need to do in person they have a campus in LA i can just drive to. im not gonna go jax. i told the guy i couldnt. i was going to tell you but the right time never came. i knew you would think i was gonna leave even if i told you i wasnt. then when you told me tara was gonna leave i didnt want to add to the shit youre going through." she told me. i felt like a jackass.

"tay you should do it. thats amazing they picked you. you said its hard as fuck and takes years look how quick you got picked. im sorry i got mad. i just thought you were gonna leave me too." i said sitting down next to her and pulled her into my side.

"its amazing and rare but if anything ill just finish at stockton then open a studio here in charming. i dont NEED art school. and if i decide to go itll be to the one in LA. no matter where i am im alwats here for you jax. youre my soulmate." she told me.

"you deserve to go tay." i told her kissing her temple. "and if people didnt know any better theyd think we were together." i said laughing.

"oh im sure they think it. but im serious im always here jax even when youre an ass and piss me off." she told me wrapping her arms and legs around me from the side.

"and im gonna always be here for you. and what are you a damn spider monkey now!" we both bustrd out laughing cause of how she was wrapped around me.

i stood up and shifted her to my back. "lets go see about that cabin trip tonight." i said walking out the door. i paused so she could close it behind us.

we walked to the bar and everyone was sitting around. they laughed when they seen me giving her a piggyback ride.

"yall good now?" ope asked passing me a beer. god we really were some alcoholics.

"yeah were good. cant stay mad at her she would kill me." i said seriously

"what happened now? yall really do fight like brother and sister." clay said. i felt taylor squeeze me, wasnt sure why.

"i got mad about new york but were good now right tay." i asked turning my head to look at her and i knew instantly i fucked up. she was squeezing me to tell me to shut up. fuck.

"what about new york?" bobby asked.

i looked around before i realized happy and chibs knew cause of the looks on their face. taylor pushed herself off me and i let her down.

"i got offered a full ride to the new york film academy." she told everyone. they started cheering and congratulating her. "wait. im not going guys. if anything ill do online and if i need to they got a campus in LA." she said.

"even if you dont go you still got picked nicole. be proud of that. youve said they dont just pick anyone look at you, you got in. dont down play that shit." bobby said hugging her and kissing her head.

"shit you dont need them youre great as it is thats why they picked you baby girl. lets have a party to celebrate?" clay asked.

"well us kids were wanting to see if yall didnt need ope or jax if we could go to  the cabin tonight?" taylor asked clay then looked around at everyone. all the guys sighed.

"if thats what the princess wants. yall go ahead. well celebrate another time." clay said hughing her.

"okay since yall need a excuse to party apparently what if we went next weekend instead of tonight?" she asked. everyone started cheering once clay said that was good.

taylor walked over to lyla, opie and me.
"now we get a whole weekend if yall still want to go." she said more like asking if we wanted to go.
"hell yeah ill go. little time away will be nice." lyla said.
"yeah then we can have our own celebration." opie said pulling taylor in between his legs kissing her.
"jesus. thats my sister." i said acting grossed out.
"oh shut it jax." taylor told me slapping my arm laughing.

"im gonna go tell ma. before anyone else does. and see if she wants to help me get everything for tonight." taylor said before she walked out the clubhouse.