hard to love

chapter 88

taylors POV

its been two days after we took care of the sick bastard i had tyler and kate fly the twins to charming. opie rode with me to meet them at the airport.

"what if they dont like me tay?" he asked looking at me from the drivers seat with a worried look

"they will love you ope. they dont know any of the bullshit, i never told them you didnt want them, i just said you couldnt be there right now and i would explain when they got bigger. once theyre old enough ill just tell them we miscommunicated and you actually didnt find out when i thought you did. i dont want them to ever feel that pain. stop worrying they will pick up on that."

"im so sorry taylor. i know nothing i do or say with ever change any of it but i wish i knew, i wish you never left charming. i wish i could have seen you pregnant, i bet you looked so beautiful, i wish i would have been in the room when you had them, i wish i didnt miss out on everything. but im not going anywhere, every day from now on im taking care of whats mine." he said reaching over and squeezing my thigh.

i knew he was silently including me in what was his. we havent talked about us. we have talked its been about the kids, i tried to tell him as much as i could. i could tell he loved them as soon as i told him they were his.

i felt like the worst person since i basically kept them apart. i should have known he would have wanted our kids i just really thought it was him.

"whats going on in your head tay?" he said me

"i just wish i wasnt so stupid. im the worst person and mom for basically keeping yall apart. i should have known you would have wanted them. i cant help but feel like i fucked up their lives. and yours. i know you got some shit in your head trying to figure this out but i feel so responsible for you not knowing them. im so sorry ope. i should have come back and talked to you in person but i was so scared you would reject them again and i was scared i would feel so bad for them which could make me lose the pregnancy."

"taylor stop that. honestly its neither of our faults. just know the moment i found out about them i loved them with everything in me, i didnt think it was possible to love someone this much let alone two people. but fuck i cant wait to meet them and do dad shit. i need to work on my dad jokes." he said making me laugh

"oh god. dont worry i hit them with the mom Jokes alot. they sometimes get it and tell me im silly. just know they are already extremely sarcastic so be prepared."

we got to the airport and i showed him where to pull around to for the private area. we got there a little early.

"you ready daddy?" i asked him with a smile

"hell yeah but hell no. and jesus i dont think i can handle you calling me that with out them around." he said as he adjusted his pants

i blushed "shit sorry ope. i wasnt meaning it like that."

"i get how you meant it but i think hearing you call me that will always get to me." he said winking.

i couldnt even go there right now but did i love when he winked at me eith that flirty smirk.

i shook my head "i dont think right now is the time to even go there ope."

he looked at me sad "yeah alright."

"ope please. i just got back. there so much shit go on and my head is so fucked. im not the same opie. you gotta get to know our kids and we need to figure out this co-parenting shit."

"yeah i guess youre right. we can take this day by day."

we watched the jet land. i looked overto opie "you ready?" i asked him and i could tell he was nervous. "hell no. what if they hate me?"