Don't Hug Me I'm Scared {Billie Eilish}

{88}✔️

A/N: Long chapter 🤠🤠

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Dahlia's POV
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I furrowed my brows and murmured to myself for a few moments before slowly allowing my eyes to flutter open. I immediately squeezed them shut again after getting an eye full of the sunlight that was streaming in from Cadence's window. I was still for a few moments, hoping to drift off again, but then I realized that there was a weight on my hips.

I turned my head around to look at what it was and my narrowed eyes immediately widened once I saw that it was Billie. Her arms were wrapped around me, and the longer I was awake, the more I noticed how close she was to me. I could feel her head resting on my back and I could hear her deep breathing and the small snores escaping her lips now and then. Her hair must be over her face, as it always seems to end up when she's sleeping because I can feel it tickling my neck. I can smell her scent, and she smells like vanilla, just like always. Her arms are holding me tightly, her front pressed into my back.

Just like when we were together and we'd fall asleep and wake up like this. I feel so warm and content, and comfortable. I feel safe. I feel like she's engulfing me.

"You'll definitely know when you love her because it'll feel like you're enveloped in something." Dad had said. "It might feel like how a nice, warm blanket feels when it's draped over you. Might feel like you're in a big group hug...I don't know. For me, it always just felt like I was being weighed down. Not in a bad way, in a comforting way."

Fuck.

Why do I have to love this bitch so much? I hate this shit.

I contemplated moving away from her, waking her up, or getting up and leaving the room just like it seems everyone else had done because there's nobody here except for us, but I couldn't.

I miss her so fucking much and I hate it. I just want to pretend that we're still with each other for a while. I'll just lay here, in her arms, until she wakes up, and then I'll pretend that I've been asleep the whole time.

That's what I did. For about thirty minutes I just laid there, taking in the feeling of her wrapped around me. I don't know why I decided to do that. It just made me feel worse.

I tried to pretend we were still together, but we're not, and I just couldn't seem to quit thinking about that.

It seems like this whole 'breakup' thing is coming in waves. The night we broke up I was fine. I was mad at her and I just didn't think about it much. The next day I woke up and I felt pretty much normal. It was weird not talking to her that whole day, but it was whatever.

All the days since then I guess I started thinking about it more and more, but as sad as it made me to think about, it's never hit me this hard.

It's really over. It's really over, and this is the first time I'm really, really thinking about that, and now I can't stop crying.

Fuck. This is not the right time for this.

I was going to get up quickly, not wanting to risk someone coming in and seeing me full on sobbing, wrapped up in her arms, not wanting to spoil what's supposed to be a fun weekend for us, and also not wanting her to wake up and see me crying, but that's exactly what happened.